Do you like this poem I wrote down?

Question

*****

FINAL PLACE SANS RESTING

I’ve been set free

from the sorrow and pain,

from the shackles and chains,

in the ground I’ve been laid,

I’ve no more fight

for ropes and restraints,

for the frowns and complaints,

or the guilty mistakes

I’ve no more rhyme

in words that atone,

it’s here I roam

in the forest of stones.

*****

Answer 1

But your words echo throughout eternity. (through time and space and in our hearts)

Just think, no more shaving or trimming.  There's a plus I bet you hadn't thought of.

Re the "forest of stones" line, if one falls down and there is no-one near to hear it....

Answer 2

There is something to be said for assonance. As for the message--please, not yet!

Answer 3

i absolutely love it!! : )

Answer 4

Time will tell.  We'll all be free eventually.  When they finally put me down, please no concrete vault, embalming fluid, or makeup!  Pour a good bottle of Single Malt, Viello Añejo, or Napoleon VSOP in me if you have to.

Answer 5

whoa that's great!ur  a great writer maybe you'll have a good future=]

Answer 6

ITS MARVELOUS!

Great job! I really enjoyed it.

Answer 7

i love it =P

ur sooo good.

tnx 4 sharing

Answer 8

Edelle predicts for you a good future...

I agree!

Answer 9

John Donne would love this graveyard musing, this would be great on a headstone.  A throwback to earlier days in N.E. where I was born.

You should see some of the rhymes in my family's cemetery!

Answer 10

Yes.  

Answer 11

its actually very good!

im impressed with the rhymes you chose, because when most people try so hard to rhyme their poem loses its sense, but not this one!

good job  

Answer 12

Yet another masterful scribe has shared his pen with paper.  Beautiful, my friend and mentor.

Answer 13

The spirit still roams--I knew there was an afterlife.

Loved the scheme in this. I can't really explain in terms of prosody why, but it worked for me. Maybe it's the way the first line of stanza one and two are tied together with their consonants and then two and three are tied together with their vowels. Did you do that on purpose? Does that mean it's ABBB ACCC ADDD, or am I mistaken?

Answer 14

The last line redeems this from the mediocre (well, mediocre coming from you...from anyone else I would class this as brilliant)

Answer 15

Oui.  

Answer 16

Love that last line! This poem makes me think about things I usually try to avoid, yet you have written it so beautifully and there is something comforting about the first stanza...to be free.

Answer 17

no

Answer 18

I love it!

Answer 19

Of course it's excellent.....but I so hate thinking about the afterlife.....the forest of stones.....Here's wishing all of us long, happy, healthy lives!!!!

Answer 20

I like it, it sounds like something you just pulled out of your head right then and there, no forcing the words through. That's what i like about it, it comes natural and with so much emotion like your at a writers block or something. Either that or you finally finished something and with pride you wrote this down. I say it's very contimplative, it makesw me wonder so many things, which is what most good poems ought to do( keep you guessing) and not spell it out right there. Terrific and Excellent!! (:

Answer 21

wow

i really like it

its seriously really good to me

Answer 22

i like the forest of stones. its makes me want to play zelda...