Do you think Kids and Babies should be invited to a wedding?

Question

Do you think Kids and Babies should be invited to a wedding?

Answer 1

It's entirely up to the bride and groom.

Answer 2

I personally love kids, and I would not be surprised if they consisted of 1/4 of my guest list.

I don't have any problem with people excluding kids though. These are adult events, and they are pretty boring for a kid. It is ridiculous to expect them to sit there happily for a long ceremony and then through a long dinner with no real entertainment. Some parents think everything their little angel does is cute, and once they get partying the kids sometimes can get ignored. Many parents don't even want to deal with kids, they would rather pay for the sitter than to have to watch them all night.

An invitation to a wedding is just that, an invitation. If you can't find a sitter or don't want to leave the kids at home, then just decline. I hate when people use the "its the couple's day" thing to let them do whatever they want, but it isn't really rude to expect kids to be left at home for an adult event. Its better than the bride being upset with the mom when the kid rolls down the aisle.

If they are invited to the ceremony, they should be treated like any other guests and should be provided with food. It is OK to set up a kids area or to request that they leave before the party gets wild, but they shouldn't just be invited to the part they would find most boring.

Answer 3

Children under the age of 4 should not be invited to a wedding unless their parents will be free during the entire ceremony to supervise them.

An toddler under age 4 has no idea of the meaning of the ceremony and for all practical purposes, will not remember any of it, learn anything much from it or retain how to participate in it.  Infants, do not belong at weddings because it is an imposition on them and on their parents who have no choice but to bring them unless they get a baby-sitter.

Answer 4

I think that depends on the type of wedding.

We are having a very formal evening wedding, and do not want children there because it is late, and very elegant, too many things they can break ect.

My best friend however is planning her wedding and wants children to be there because she feels they are family ans friends too and wants to celebrate with them. She is having a much more fun and small wedding during the day.  

Answer 5

I had kids invited to my wedding.. most only came to the reception .. I had a corner of the hall set up a play area with a car rug, some hot wheels coloring books and crayons and it turned out fun.. the kids kind of are the entertainment on their own

Answer 6

I agree with most others...it depends on what kind of wedding you are planning and also how many of your friends and family have children as well.

My partner and I are just having an informal get together, but the only kids that will be there is close families, so we know there will be no problems.

I have been to weddings were having children turned out to be a small disaster. Weddings can be long and children get bored. I have seen kids yell and cry threw out the ceremony to getting their hands in the wedding cake. Some couples may not mind that, others would.

Persoanally I do not understand why someone would want to bring their children unless it was close family. I know my 3 year old will get bored so why bring him. I like having time out kid free :)

Answer 7

That is completely up to the bride and groom.  What is right for one couple is not necessarily right for another.  It also may depend on how large of a family they have, if people are coming with children from out of town and what time the ceremony and reception are.

I had children at my wedding and had no problems, but then again our families are very close and love children.

Answer 8

That should be up to the bride and groom.  Personally, I really enjoy babies and young children and would much rather seem them there, but not everybody feels the same way.

Answer 9

nope

Answer 10

I personally really enjoyed having the kids at my wedding. They were a lot of fun - definitely made good use out of the dance floor.  

Answer 11

the option should be open in case sum1 can't find a sitter then u and ur party know what to do. it does make kids who can read feel special that they got mail so maybe u could send mom and dad an invite to the wedding and the kids an invite to a "special kids only" party in ur church's nursery or childrens church area. they still get to dress up and up to the parents if they want them in or out of ur way.

Answer 12

in a perfect world NO

Unfortunately more and more couple have their own kids at the wedding and then they look selfish if they deny every one else

Also there is a huge difference between a wedding and a reception.

I think children should not be invited to the reception if it is semi-formal or formal or in the late afternoon or evening.

A very informal -picnic / bbq would be fine for kids. But what parent wouldn't rather have an adult evening without the kids?

Answer 13

no

Answer 14

Yes though it should be up to the parents to choose if their child can handle sitting through the ceremony without becoming cranky. My best friend is getting married next year, and as a mother herself, she told her guests that children are allowed to the ceremony but not to the reception - due to the fact that there will be an open bar and didn't think it was wise to have small children around a large group who we know will be getting very tipsy to all out drunk. My children will be going with me because I know they can sit there and not make a fuss but personally I think a child under two shouldn't attend but like I said it really should be up the parent to decide.

Answer 15

Yes i do, i havent got anything against children and babies and i think they make a wedding.

I had quite a few at mine. My flower girl was only two and she made my church service funny as she kept singing to herself and when the vicar said is there any lawful inpediment why these two people should not marry she shouted oh no really loudly. Made my day

BUT not everybody agrees.

Answer 16

Once you begin inviting children you open the slippery slope of inviting everyone's children. otherwise some parent's may be insulted. Just something to consider although I think only children who are close to the couple should be invited. If you are having children in the wedding party remember that they should also be invited to the reception.

Answer 17

Sure, if the couple likes kids and babies and can afford to have them there.  Otherwise, no.

Answer 18

It completely depends.  I went to a wedding that took place at eight in the evening, and the reception didn't get underway until nine - it was a lovely formal candlelight ceremony in a chapel and a dessert and champagne reception in an art museum after hours.  It would have been an entirely inappropriate place for young children.  They would have been bored, cranky and tired.

The most recent wedding I went to was held at four in the afternoon in the country.  It was a fairly informal affair (the bride wore a tea-length gown, no train, birdcage veil) and there were many children present.  The reception was in her sister's back yard, with a rented dance floor, a DJ, catered supper, and although she had all the trimmings, because it was outdoors it had a very casual atmosphere and the kids were allowed to just be themselves.

I think it really depends on the couple and what their vision of their day is.  There is no rule that says a couple must (or even should) invite children.

Answer 19

Some weddings are fashionable affairs intended to indulge the bride and groom with "one special day" and to provide all their friends with a stylish night on the town -- or on the bride's parents -- replete with free alcohol. Children are neither stylish, nor indulgent; nor should they be exposed to drunken adult partying. Of course, neither are respectable maiden aunts either stylish nor indulgent; and well-bred persons of any any age should be spared the display of drunken adult partying.

Other weddings are the joyful celebration of new family ties being formed within the context of existing supportive families. The children of those families will, for the next several decades, recollect the weddings at which they danced with their daddy, or saw the first wedding where they saw the groom kiss the bride, or what a lovely dress the bride wore. They will share and talk about those memories at family parties, and laugh and build relationships around their memories: and one day the children of that bride and groom will be attending those earlier children's family weddings. And the bridal couples from such families, who chose to have a fashionable adult affair, will find that their affair is simply not reminisced over. Unfortunate, but that is how families work.

A wedding with children present is an investment in future family relationships. A wedding without them is an investment in current fashion.

Answer 20

Kids and babies are just as much a part of the family as the adults are, so of course they should be invited to the wedding. I am also of the opinion that babies (i.e. under 18 months) should be welcome to the reception so that they can EAT while their moms are away. Forcing a woman to express her milk because she wants to celebrate a wedding is rather rude.

However I see nothing really wrong with having an adults-only reception (with the exception noted above). Provide babysitting for the kids, and let the parents have a night out. I prefer the idea of the reception being a family party, but that's personal preference. If, however, you don't provide the babysitting then you have to expect that a lot of people will use that as a way to get out of having to attend the reception.  

Answer 21

That's your prerogative.  IMO, I believe that children can be invited, but to keep the kid's guest count to a minimum.  As a school teacher, I know kids get antsy, tired, overwhelmed and cranky.  It's their nature.  A wedding can be a very exciting event for a child, but only for a short amount of time.  The length of a wedding is very long, between the ceremony, cocktail hour and reception, it can be 7-9 hours long.  That's too much for children.  It's too long to ask a child (especially under that age of 5) to sit and be quiet.

For myself, I would only invite children in my family.  This includes first cousins and my nieces and nephews.  I love my friend's children, but I don't want too many kids at the wedding.    Too many kids, gets too noise.  The more kids around, the more crazy it gets.   A few kids can easily be occupied with crayons, games or even a movie on a portable DVD.   When you start getting 10, 15 or 20 kids, they are all going to want to run around and play with each other.  They are going to think it's a party for them.   I don't blame them, kids only think about themselves.

In addition, children also need to have meals and chairs.   That means extra costs.   I believe in family before friends, so the children in my family can be invited.  But, friend's kids can't.   The guest list needs to be limited somewhere and I think it's unfair to not invite an important adult, because a friend's child took their seat.

So,  think the kid's count should be kept low.  I'll only be having 3 kids at my whole wedding and that's only family.  I'm happy with that.

Answer 22

No, I think children and babies should be left at home with a babysitter. Children would much rather be home with a sitter.  

Answer 23

I am always in the minority with my opinion on children at weddings, but I think it's very important that they are included!  They're part of your family, too!  Plus, you're making parents fork over money for a sitter and that doesn't seem quite fair.

If you're worried about children interrupting your fun, why don't you hire a nanny to entertain the children at your wedding.  My neighbor did this and it was just lovely.  They had their own special table with a centerpiece that they filled with paper flowers they made together.  She had crayons, paper, craft projects (they made glittery masks and bride and groom paper dolls).  She said it cost her about $125 with the cost of a nanny and all the children loved it.  They were free to come and go as they pleased, but most of them preferred to sit and play fun games and do crafts.

I thought it was an excellent idea!

Answer 24

Honestly, no. They're too unpredictable, and weddings are stressful enough without having to worry about little Timmy having a crying fit in the middle of your vows.

My philosophy on this is, "leave the kids at home." Most adults prefer to anyway because they get a night out without them (and don't have to feel guilty about it because it's an adult-only reception - they had no choice!).

We're not allowing kids under the age of 13 to our wedding, and we're really happy with out decision. Everyone in our family is more than understanding and has been okay with it. I'm sure some people at other weddings get upset about it, and that's fine. Usually after some time, they cool off and don't care. If it's a big issue for them, they don't have to come.

I personally think all evening receptions should be kid-free. Morning and afternoon receptions is a little easier to get away with.

Answer 25

Yes, definitely! Weddings are family celebrations - from the very young to the very old, and all should be included.

There are many ramifications of not having children at weddings - and I've seen that from this site. There are women getting married who have NEVER been to a wedding, and I think that's just so sad.... While I was growing up, we went to many weddings - not only of family, but of church friends, neighbours, etc. - and so 'learned' how to behave both in church and at the reception.

Families get together for weddings, so are a social occasion usually for extended family, too. Kids get to meet with their cousins, and their great-aunties, too!

I've never been to an adults-only wedding, and I sure hope I don't have the opportunity to - it would be so boring, I would think.