Do you think i should give this letter to someone who abused me?

Question

do you think i can forget it soon?...it took me a long time to understand the fact that you have killed a part of my soul by violating my body...im sure you must be remembering and deriving perverted pleasures thinking of your encounter with me..but do you also know that my mind has become irreparably ill because of the very acts?...do you remember what amount of child like innocence i had enjoyed prior to talking to you...you destroyed my innocence...but i give it to you that i have not been perfect in that aspect , otherwise i would not have tried to please you with my body..do you remember my resistance to your touches, do you remember my reluctance to participate in your perversion?...do you remember my shriek of horror when i saw you first, unclothed...do you remember how you did it all in an 'instant' manner, how you treated a 15 year old tender girl like your s*x slave..you have made me stained, tainted...you killed a part of my core...not a day passes by without the horrifying scenes of what had been done to my body when i was a child.i pray to god, daily for forgiveness, i pray to god to heal me, to make me forget the scars you have caused on me..do you know, after you, i promised myself that i will NEVER fall in love again, and i have kept i till a year or so back..yes, 7 long years...now im hopelessly in love with someone, deeply, spiritually..and i am scared...im ashamed of sharing my body, soul and mind in the sacred act of love anymore..because they are all tainted...tainted by you...i feel worthless and undeserving of a tender look, a tender touch, a tender kind of love

Answer 1

Thats perfect to give to someone like that.

Good job.

Answer 2

Dont. if you send this kind of letter to that 'dog', youll get more from him

Answer 3

yea thats deep and say something to do with ima chop ur p***s off if we meet again hope u rot in h**l pedo

Answer 4

Here's your answer....no. Absolutely not. The very act of violating someone so young regardless of whether or not there was any consent on the younger individuals' part shows nothing other than a will to be dominant and most certainly a lack of self control and wise discretion. If you give this person anything or continue to acknowledge them in any way, you continue to reinforce their reasons for dominating you in the first place. In other words, by expressing to this person this pain you continue to feel in a letter or some other way, you are essentially making yourself weak and giving this person the pleasure of dominating you again. You really don't want to do that again, do you?

      Regarding falling in love and forgiveness....You first need to forgive yourself. We all make big mistakes...everyone...myself included. I'd even venture a guess that this probably won't be your last giant 'mess-up'. It's just a part of life. But here's the good news. Life is so full of joy and wonder and excitement, it is virtually impossible to have one big event ruin an otherwise perfect exsistance! We aren't perfect beings...that is true, but once you learn and adjust you become as perfect as you can be. You sort of center yourself again...'bouy the boat', so to speak.

     Look, you understand you've made a mistake. You know what that mistake was. (Oh, by the way, s*x is not the mistake...who you have that pleasure with can be a mistake, but not s*x itself).... So you know you were wrong to give your body to this person. Fine. Mistake taken note of. You've asked God for forgiveness. Right then..done. You're forgiven. All you had to do was ask. You're forgiven...period. Now learn and move forward. You can only start from where you are. Don't keep living in the past. Here's a news-flash...you can't go backward!  For those who continue to look back, many wonderful things in front of them are overlooked. Whatever you do, don't overlook and forsake this newfound love of yours. Being in love with someone is by far one of lifes' greatest joys. You need to be honest with this person that you're in love with though...never forget that. He's the one you should be sending letters to. Let this situation be known to the one you love. Let him know you are hurt. Give him the chance not to mess-up or take certain things for granted. You will be glad you did because eventually these things in our pasts have a tendancy to rear their ugly heads. It all 'comes out in the wash' sooner or later, and if you love him truly, then prepare him.

          Now from my heart..you are magnificent. I don't even know you and yet I can say that...because it's true. You will never be worthless and undeserving to anyone except yourself. Start from inside you. Go ahead...forgive yourself. It's okay to beat yourself up on occasion...but learn and move on. How many times does a child have to teeter and fall over before they learn to run? I don't know exactly, but I'd venture a guess it's quite a bit. Pick yourself up. Start to walk again. Someone loves you...all of you...regardless of your past...don't let that slip away. And for cryin' out loud!...don't give that other person the benefit of knowing he is still dominating you! Your letter won't hurt him or make him feel guilty at all....only satisfied. If you really want to hurt someone, all you need to do is ignore them completely, erasing any notion in their minds that your thinking of them in any way.

    My best to you- stay in love -R.                          

Answer 5

If you think that passing this letter on to the person who did this to you will bring you some kind of closure, then yes, I think you should send it.

But if you think that giving it to him will just uncover old wounds, then maybe it would be best to keep it to yourself. Do you even want to get back in contact with the monster who took advantage of you so many years ago.

When I was 14, I had an abortion after having someone take advantage of me, and was having a very hard time dealing with the fact that I'd taken a life. I went to a counselor, and she got me to write a letter to the baby; obviously I couldn't send it, but the writing of the letter alone helped me. It helped me come to terms with the fact that it was the right choice for me, and that I had done nothing wrong.

I know the two situations are completely different, but maybe they're similar enough.

I don't know; there's no single way of healing after such a traumatic event, and I think it depends on the individual.

I'm so sorry that such a horrible thing had to happen to you at such a young age.

Best of luck,

xx    

Answer 6

The main focus of the letter for YOU is to get closure. If you do send the letter, please don't expect a response. Even if you get one, don't read it, burn it, flush it, but don't read it. Remember now, you want closure from this. Any contact with this person will open up old wounds that you want to keep closed. Prolonging closure by NOT sending the letter will hurt you more than if you don't send it.

This is your chance to end all the pain, or at least dull it to the point that you can get on with your life freely without it holding you down. This is my opinion on your situation.

Send the letter.

Answer 7

you are so brave to have gone through something like this for 7 years...you should send it but be care-full with the response.  

Answer 8

that almost made me cry to read that.

you should send that to him!

Answer 9

You are not going to guilt trip him with this letter or any other letter. If he is an abuser he will continue being so, and it is not upto you to change him. Get a therapist and sort out your issues. Let the abuser go, it is the past, move on. You need to heal. Don't feel so sorry for yourself. You don't need God's "forgiveness" because you did nothing wrong, you were just young and stupid and used. Like a lot of other girls your age.

Get help for your sexual fears and emotional issues. And forget the past and build a future with the guy you love.

I am sorry if this sounds harsh but this is exactly the best advice for you.

Answer 10

don't be kid again.you realized and reached on a maturity then why again wanted to behave like a kid????Are you going to get something back??? i mean your age or beauty???surly not ................

then what will you get by this act??? nothing.............

Forget that person and try to forget your past.........be optimistic and think only for better tomorrow.