Do you think ill marry my bf?

Question

we both talk about marrying each other, are totally in love and have the perfect relationship but he says he wants to get married in 4 years time, this i dont mind (although i would love to get married sooner) but do you think he's deliberately putting it off for some reason? I'm 19 he is 21 and we've been together and living together for a year. thanks so much for your opinions

Answer 1

mmh its long en why are you staying together fr fun or what hey wake up gal then know ur just having fun dont have a kid before marriage i tasted it en its bad

Answer 2

I cant tell you what he is thinking.  He either he knows you are young and need to grow up a bit before you make such a huge commitment or sees no reason to marry you since you are already living together and basically have a marriage.

Answer 3

No, unless you nag him into it.

Answer 4

If you guys are living together why not just get married? I told my bf that i wasn't moving in until we were married. Why don't you ask him? Maybe he's afraid of something..  

Answer 5

I am assuming he wants to wait to graduate college, or at least until he turns 25? That sounds reasonable... Whether or not you get married in 4 years we won't know for 4 more years, but I don't believe he means it as any kind of a brushoff, I'll take it at face value that he is sincere...  

Answer 6

There is nothing wrong with waiting. I'm sure when you do ( and he does) get married.. you only want to do it once. He wants to make sure this is truly what he wants.. and there is nothing wrong with that. Time isn't going anywhere.. so be patient. If it's meant to be.. it will.

Answer 7

Best to wait 4 years to make sure of marriage than to marry now and divorce in 4 years because it didn't work. If the relationship is still strong in 4 years then it would have been worth the wait. If the relationship doesn't last 4 years, then you won't have a messy divorce.

Answer 8

There could be a particular reason that he wants to wait. I'm in that same situation. I love my girlfriend and I know I wanna spend the rest of my life with her. I'm in the military and she lives far away from me and she's planning on going to school there. She has no problem coming to live with me but I don't want her to give up her education because of me. I love her very much and I tell her I'll always be here no matter how long it takes. My girlfriend wants to get married as soon as I get back from my deployment but I'm trying to not mention it much because I'm still looking for the perfect engagement ring. Just have faith in your guy, that is if he hasn't given u a reason to doubt him. Just because you're not getting married right this second, doesn't mean he doesn't want to spend his life with you. Trust me! :)

Answer 9

I feel 4 years is a longer period, it would have been better if it could be arranged a little earlier say within 2 years

Answer 10

Well I don't know how long you have been living together, but it could be that he has reserves about you and him and it will take that long to make up his mind. Is he going to School? if he is, it could be that. Or he wants to make sure that he has enough money to take car of you. You need to tell all the facts girl, for someone to give you advise.

Answer 11

OK...im not sure whats going thru his mind, but i can understand where he is coming from...he may be scared...it has been proven that before the marriage, everything is more likely to go over pretty good...but did you know that the percentage of divorces during the first 5 years is high as h**l!!!!!! think about it, you are saying that you have the perfect relationship...thats a reason to be concerned upfront...dont go into marriage thinking that you will always have the perfect relationship b/c its probably going to be nothing like that. the ball game changes when that ring goes on that finger and the vows are said...take these four years as a time frame to look at your situation and really think about things like, can i see myself at age 68 still living happily with this person...if something happens to him or myself, can i trust that we will always be here to help and love on him...and thats a BIG question there....say (god forbid) you are 72 years old and you are still as healthy as an ox, but he is74 and has all types of illnesses and sicknesses, say he cant take care of himself at all, do you love him enough to really take care of him...i.e. bath him, wash him, feed him, basically be a live in nurse to your husband, b/c thats how it was intended to be...now if it was in reverse do you think the outcome woll be the same? Respect his 4 year wishes b/c i believe he is watching out for you guys long-term success in  your marriage ...( i should be gettin paid for dis s***)

Answer 12

So, you want me to tell your fortune?  "Difficult to see.  Always in motion the future is."  That said, I predict that the answer to this depends on one factor.  If you get pregnant, he will NOT marry you, but if you don't, he will, and you will live happily ever after.

Answer 13

No!!  HE is already living with you and getting all the Goodies what more can he WANT!!

Answer 14

if your is true love,he will surely wait for 4yrs and marry u.may be he wants to find a stable job first.wait,if he is worth waiting for.

Answer 15

I don't think there's anything wrong with waiting that amount of time - in fact, I think he's smart for it.

Not to say relationships can't work if moved quickly - my husband and I moved in together after 6 months of dating, and married only 1 year later.  However, it's not typical.

If he's not ready to marry and feels he needs a few years to do so, allow him that time and space.  You don't want to force him or rush him into marriage - trust me, you will end up divorced (or at least unhappy) so fast your head will spin.  Besides, 4 years isn't so long to wait when you're only 19, right? :)

You need to wait 'til at least 21 anyway so you can have a champagne toast at your wedding!!

Good luck!