Do you think it seems that Grandparents love their grandchildren more than their actual children? and...?

Question

Do you find Grandparents act as though they feel that they have some ownership over your children?

Answer 1

Well my grandma sure doesnt love me more lol, but then again she is a mean lady that doesnt love my mom either.  But my mother oohh myy , she spoils the c**p out of my son,  she lets him do whatever he wants an it drives me nuts!!!    He even goes to her before me when he wants something especially if he knows i will say no, and tes she seems to think she has ownership.. i will put him in time out and she will go over there a minute later an take him out?!  It makes me so mad lol, he is 5 years old and such a pain if we go to grammas, which we do alot.  Plus she baby sits him when im at work so he gets this idea he can act the same at home...  i do not think she loves him more, because i am her child and thats an unconditional different type of  love.. maybe she loves us the same, but even if she did it wouldnt bother me though because he is my baby and he deserves all the love in the world :)

Answer 2

No.  They probably miss the times when their children were little, and enjoy seeing the next generation.  I think they have less responsibility so they really get to take it all in and truly enjoy the experience of watching a child.  I think the level of involvement/responsibility the parent gives or expects of the grandparent determines whether they show an attitude of ownership over the children.  Not to mention, they've been there, done that, so they may think they know better than the parent in some circumstances.

Answer 3

Never. I let my mom know the rules with my daughter and she respects them and follows them, whether she agrees with them or not. She doesn't agree that my 16 month old should be exclusively on sippy cups, but thinks she should still be on bottles, she doesn't agree that her bedtime is 8:30pm, and thinks she should go down later, but still respects it and puts her down at that hour and gives her only sippy cups.

If there's anything she doesn't agree with, she tells me, but still respects that my daughter is my daughter and we, my husband and I, make the rules and those rules need to be followed.

Answer 4

My mother-in-law is in a very controlled marriage. she is not allowed to walk up to us we have to go to her.

When we accually did that she didnt even talk to her son or myself. she would take our son and walk away from us.

She was never a huge part in her own sons life( my boyfriend and father to our son). and she only wants to deal with our son not either one of us.

I think she believes since she is the "grandma" she has an obligation to my son. She knows whats best for him. and so on and so forth. she could be sitting 100 ft away from us and not come and see Dakota even.

My mom however loves myself and my son equal. i guess it all depends on the realtionship you have with your own parents.

Answer 5

My parents don't act like they have "ownership" over my daughter. They never have. But as far as do they love her more than me... OF COURSE!

My mom always told me having grandbabies is better than having kids because you get to do all the fun stuff and miss out on the waking up every 2 hours to feed them, dirty diapers, punishing them, dragging them to the doctors when they have an ear ache etc.

Of course I am sure it has a little something to do with her getting to sit back laughing getting paybacks for all the years I was a kid too! I wish my mom was as good as she is with her grandkids, to us growing up.

Answer 6

I dont think they LOVE their grandchildren more, but they do SPOIL them more in most cases. With their own kids, they were always there, they had to bathe them, feed them, spend all their money on them, look after them always. With grandkids, its normally a day here, a few hours there and they are happy to see them, they dont spend all their time and money on them. Therefore love to spoil them occasionally, then, when done, they can send them back to the parents.

Answer 7

I want to believe so. My sis has 3 girls and they live in new york and i live in Texas they get way more excited when they come over then I come home... But i guess they had there time to raise me and now it is the girls time to get spoiled...

Answer 8

I don't think that my parents love my children more then they love me, I think they would love them about the same. I think it is just easier to show affection to a child. I have also never felt that my parents have felt any kind of 'ownership' over my kids. They have always repected my desisions on how I raise them.

Answer 9

You know what? If the grandparents are acting like they are the parents perhaps you need to take a good look at how often they are having the kids. I know a lot of parents are gonna say that grands have no say in how the children are raised and that may be true for some. But if you are using the grandparents as free or low cost babysitters, have them taking the kids to activities you cant make it to or watching the kids while you do normal daily activities welll.............. may be they feel that way because they have them so much.

Natalie: Good grandparents do help shape children into great adults. If they dont insist on good behavior they are not doing the right thing for the kids. Grand parents should insist on the children doing the same things their parents insist on.

This can be a constant source of annoyance to the parents who are trying to instill values - grands should assist the parent to this end.

Answer 10

Grandparents don't love their grandchildren more than their children - but they ENJOY them more.  Grandparents don't have to deal with the daily stresses of having a child - they can just enjoy all the good moments.   Grandparents don't have the responsibility for the grandchild's wellbeing.

I've heard of some grandparents that act as if they have some ownership over their grandchildren - sort of a "I know better, been there, done that" kind of attitude.  That has not been my experience with my kids and their grandparents.  Its been a great, loving relationship.

Answer 11

I think they spoil them more which comes off like Love to the kids. Plus the grandchildren go home!

Answer 12

Well i found my daughters grandparents shirt that say "If i knew grand kids was so much fun i would have had them first"

I know my parents love my daughter better then me and only reason i know is cause i know how i was treated and they act like i am the worse mom in the world trying to make her listen cause i use time out and last time i told her i would give her a little swat on the tail nothing major just to let her know i meant business my dad called me a bad mom

but her other grandpa is great with her and i don't think he loves my husband and my daughter any different as he stays with us know as he is older and needs some help so we just love having him here it is great to have a baby sitter so i can go take a shower or run to the grocery store for 30 minutes

but as my little girls grandparents do think they have ownership on my daughter and i have told them if she belongs to them well i need child support and my husbands dad actually ask how much i needed i did not take money but i guess i am just a little to scared to tell them to back off me a little

Answer 13

Grandparents just really love little kids. It reminds them of when you were their precious babies. It's something that can give them a lot of joy.

Grandparents also don't need to worry about punishing their grandchildren or shaping their morals & beliefs. They get all the good times without the pressure of the actual parenting

Answer 14

No. My mom has only watched my son a couple of times and he's 5 years old. It's like pulling teeth to get her involved with him.