Do you think its okay for parent to hit kids as form of a punishment?

Question

Parents: would you like somone to hit you when you misbehave

Answer 1

How many that have answered here are actually parents? Or just giving their inexperienced opinions? I am a father. I was disciplined as a child by a spanking when warranted - I turned out ok. Going forward, I have no intentions of 'hitting' or 'beating' my son, but he can count on a spanked tush for those times that a simple scolding, or grounding won't work.

Edit - Ilvecount... you said everything I wanted but did not have the time to I agree completely. There is a line that separates a spanked bottom, from a beaten child, as long as you do not cross that line, no - one can tell you how to raise your children.

Answer 2

a parent should have the right spank their children. as long as it isnt excessive nor abusive.

You always hear there are better ways such as time outs and reasoning with the child. How can you reason with a child? doesnt make sense. Those options are working so well in todays society, NOT!.  My wife tried them and they NEVER worked. I know some people will say you didnt stick to it or didnt enforce it properly but that is far from truth.

There was more respect for parents from their children when corporal punishment was prevalent. in my opinion the time out generation shows less respect for everyone and everything.

one of the responses to this question was that spanking warps a childs sexuality. That has to be one of the dumbest things I have ever heard. would love to hear how the person came up and justifies that comment

Answer 3

Oh my gosh!! If you hit your kids to punish them, it's just not right!! IT'S CHILD ABUSE!! It really, isn't good. They won't learn anything. Just ground them or take away a privlege. Just don't hit them. In a lot of states, that's illegal.

Answer 4

it depends if you hit the kid unbeilevibly hard and could really hurt them dont do it. hitting is a way of letting out stress. you should never take it out on your kids. if they where being really bad and you give them a little spank i think thats okay. but never do it if someone could really get hurt. theres always other ways to approach it.

Answer 5

Yes, I think it's okay for a parent to spank their child as a form of punishment, if the situation warrented it. I normally don't have to spank my son because he's well behaved but I have before and I would again, if the situation called for it. I wouldn't just hit him for any reason though.

No, I would never let another adult hit me for any reason. No adult should be discipling another adult. Discipline should have been instilled by PARENTS long before a child reaches adulthood. I wouldn't let another adult hit my child to discipline, either. If my son misbehaves in school or elsewhere, it's up to me to discipline him as a his parent, not another adult. I would never hit someone else's child either.

Also, there are forms of discipline that adults/parents have to go through. When you run a red light and is caught by the police, you get a ticket. If you shoplift and is caught you go to the jail or get probation. If you punch someone in the face and is caught, you can get sued in civil court. In some societies, adults are canned for misbehaving. All of those are slaps on the wrists. It's not as if nothing happens to adults who misbehave. Children have to face some sort disciplinary action when they misbehave and usually, the punishment is supposed to fit the crime. So, yes.. there are certainly times when spanking my child might be warrented.

Answer 6

I believe that parents hit kids out of frustration

there is a better way of getting through to that child but the parent may not have discovered it and is frustrated with the child and believes this is the only way to get through to the child

Answer 7

ok, spanking or whipping at kid or even backhanding them as a punishment is NOT child abuse. you're all retarded if you think that is abusing a child. taking away things or "talking" to them DOES NOT WORK. how many children can you reasonably talk to and they listen? i can talk to ADULTS reasonably and still feel like im talking to a 2 year old because they dont have the attention span!

Answer 8

There is a difference between:

Correcting your offspring's behavior

and

Torturing your offspring.

I do believe its ok to "hit" your child. A young young kid can not understand concretely or morally what is right or wrong. You cant tell him or her not to use explicit language on his school peers because it is socially wrong. He won't understand! But if you say to the kid, "Whenever you say F*** you to your school peer (lol) you are hurting his feelings" then give him and example "If I throw a marshmellow at you, will it hurt?" no. "If I throw a big rock at you, will it hurt?" yes. "well when you call another person a F*****Er your are throwing a big rock at them and it will 'hurt' their feelings."

Now if my kid was to do it again and use an explicit word my next form of punishment would be physical. Not torture! Just scare the kid so he understands that you do Not like to tell him twice. He will also learn that he should learn from the first time not the second time. He will know what to expect if he breaks the rules.

That's how life is. And the best time to learn is when they are young right? So let's get these kids on the right track to life.

PS. As I travel the city and join people in social gatherings I notice how many kids are too... i don't know... free, loose, disrespect full i guess. I see parents without control on their children. I seen children hit their own parents or cus at them in public. I seen them misbehave in public. And thats because parents are too nice. "I don't believe in hitting." says the parents. I reply with, "Ok then why is you son hitting me?!" Tell him to stop!"

Haha get my point?!

I think america needs to get a little tougher with their kids. They are the future.

Answer 9

yea

Answer 10

personally my son knows that if I have to spank him then he's in trouble. Sometimes kids know their limits and know that if they keep pushing it then that's the consequence. As long as you don't beat them then there's nothing wrong with spankings.

Answer 11

I do not have any problem with a tap on the hand or butt particularly if in response to a dangerous situation like trying to play with an electrical outlet. however i don't think a child ever should be hit in the face or with any 'weapon' even if it just a newspaper

Answer 12

no I don't think it's okay for parents to hit kids ever...it's also not necessesary. I have 4 well behaved, respectful kids who have never been spanked. It's about having a good parenting style, good communication, set rules and consequences and being consistent. It's only when these things aren't all present that harsh punishment becomes a parents last resort.

EDIT: thumbs down for being able to raise well behaved kids without spanking them? Obviously thumbs down are from parents who are jealous that they are not capable of raising kids without hitting them...sad

Answer 13

I'm a parent and a psychologist.  Hitting kids does not work.  I know from the research and from my experience as a parent.  I also did an episode on this topic for my podcast.  Here's the link:

http://www.thepsychfiles.com/2007/09/05/...

I think you'll find it interesting.

Michael

Host of The Psych Files podcast

Subscribe in iTunes

http://www.psychfilespodcast.com

Answer 14

It depends on what you mean by hitting. i mean most parents believe that if you hit your kid its abuse. but it all depends on the parnets discipline skills. If the parent can't control their kid enough then they should discipline them in a way that they think would be appropriate.

There are times where a parent is too abusive to their kid. You can never tell. To be safe, i wouldn't try to hit a kid.

Answer 15

Of course it's ok, i just dont think it WORKS because what kind of kid cares if you hit them? They're probably not gonna stop misbehaving if you do that. The best punishment is taking away something they love, or just having a talk with them.

Answer 16

not HIT

but when a child goes too far (ex. pees on their bed, smashes a window on purpose, etc.) discipline is needed.

As I was in my teen years, my parents usually talked things out with me so I could understand what I did wrong. I was never grounded -- and I don't see that point of it either.

but usually when I was younger and extremely unreasonable, my parents would slap my hand or spank me but that was when I was totally out of hand.

So if you're talking about child abuse and hitting with a baseball bat or something, NO. And if it's out of frustration, we're all human! So it's forgivable but not if it's routine. But if it's a slap or something for discipline, I think that is absolutely necessary. However grounding etc. often proves absolutely useless, because every time I know a kid who gets grounded, it happens over and over again.

"Oh, you can't text for a month, bobby" Big woop! so now they're going to die because they can't text! I'm sorry, but grounding isn't very helpful.

I'm proud to say that because my parents disciplined me well, I built up a respectful and friendly relationship with them and I turned out pretty good!

well actually I've been rambling for quite a while now, and why are you asking this, anyway?

*EDIT*

Amen to the person below me;;

American kids in general are wayyy too spoiled.

"Oh honey, every time you get an A in school, I'll give you 100 dollars!"

That is honestly a true story. scary, right? Fortunately the kid wasn't all that smart ;)

Answer 17

To me there is a difference between hitting them (beating)and spanking them.  I always think it's best to discipline them in another way, time out, taking away a favorite thing...grounding. Unfortunately that doesn't always work.  Do you spank a child for spilling their drink no...if you have a toddler who is getting ready to do something like touch a hot stove, I think it is perfectly acceptable to smack their hand or swat their butt and tell them no.  Because we all know that the word no alone does not always work on a little one.  No one has a right to " beat a child".  I think there is a time when the child is too old to be "spanked" too.

There will always be debate on whether spanking a child is right or wrong.  But I also think a parent has a right to decide how to discipline their own child.........again as long as they are not beating the child.   But I think most people would agree that a lot of children (not all) today are not taught manners or how to behave. They think they can pretty much do or say anything they want, without repercussions.  Why do they think this, well because they are acting like their parents in a lot of cases. Children learn by example.

My parents spanked me,  not a lot but when they felt I needed it. My moms favorite was soap in the mouth if I sassed her...which wasn't often after the first time.  Kids test their parents to see what they can get by with.  I find that follow through usually keeps it to a minimum. If you tell your child not to do something or they will get a spanking, a time out, grounded...lose a privilege ......whatever you choose,  follow through if they do not mind you.   I just love the parent in the store who tells little Johnny (in their sing song voice)  Now, Johnny stop running over the nice lady with the cart or in a restaurant....Sally stop throwing your food.......then don't do anything when they continue to do it.   You can bet they do the same thing at home.  We (my sister and I) knew how to behave in public because we knew what happened if we didn't.  My mother was a big believer in follow through, you knew when she said to do something you better mind her.  My mother was also a big believer in praising us too.  

My sister and I did the same when raising our children...and thank goodness they have turned into wonderful, responsible adults.  My thought is, when the government gives us money for food/clothes/collage and a roof over our heads then they can can tell me how to raise/discipline my child. Until then butt out........and I'm not talking about those who abuse children by beating them/ withhold food etc as punishment.  No one should cross the line from spanking to beating.

Answer 18

as a last resort and NEVER out of anger.

Answer 19

If you're talking about spanking, it is an appropriate form of punishment when used rarely.

Abuse is never okay, naturally.  That would cause physical and emotional trauma, instill fear, and promote violence.

Spankings don't cause any form of trauma.

Answer 20

Times have changed and it is absolutely not ok to hit your child.  Human beings have since discovered more effective ways to discipline a child. Negative reinforcement is popular. Consistency and rewards are important for a child's well being (in regards to his/her behavior). But again, physical punishment is not a reliable form (nor is it an acceptable one) of punishment..

Answer 21

no

Answer 22

it is absolutely not ok for anyone to "hit" a child.  it is on the other hand perfectly fine for a parent to spank their child if that is the form of discipline they choose.

Answer 23

does that include spanking?

Answer 24

No it's stupid. I don't get hit, I get grounded. If my parents hit me as a punishment I would just behave worse. I don;t like people ot think that they can inflict pain on me in any way.

Answer 25

I absolutely agree with Kimberly. Spanking as a punishment is absolutely acceptable. Ever since spanking your child has become a "bad" thing society has deteriorated so fast that it is unbelievable. When will people wake up and see that? When I have children they will receive old fashioned discipline. I personally don't agree with backhanding a child. But spanking with the hand, hairbrush or wooden spoon is acceptable. It should however never be done out of anger. If you are angry send your child to his/her room and wait 5 min to cool down then administer the punishment.

Answer 26

No, because that teaches kids it is okay to hit to get our own way.

Answer 27

Parents who strike children or 'spank' them as they call it are very primitive people who display violence as an okay thing if someone is mad. This is wrong and the parents MUST learn this, and end their arrogance.