Do you think my poem is good?

Question

What do you think about this poem I wrote--

I love him so much;

It makes me cry;

I need him so bad;

I cant sleep at night;

I try to find the words;

But they never do come out right;

After knowing him for all these years;

At least by now Im used to all the tears;

But I still want him so bad;

and I'd do anything just to make him understand;

He's the one who's stolen my heart away;

I'd do anything to make him feel the same;

The love of my life;

Who so far has only caused me suffering, pain, and strife;

Yet I continue to fight;

Because he's my every waking thought;

And my every dream at night;

I search for words to get me in his heart;

But I dont know what to say;

And I dont know where to start;

He's the one I've dreamed of all my life;

I'd do anything just to look into his eyes;

He's the one I've given my heart to;

Only to find he wont give me his heart too;

I close my eyes and dream that he is there;

Answer 1

I hate to say this but it reads like a romance novel poem. A little to youthful and cliche. I am sure you may of felt these feelings but it borders on a little cheesy. I didnt find it overly poetic, I would dig a little deeper, be a little more raw with the feelings. It very shallow in words, not enough deep meaning

Answer 2

i agree w/ "im not a dude" =P

try to make it less every1 and more YOU. describe less of the situation and more of YOUR feelings.

like when u say " i love him so much it makes me cry" u and change it 2 something less cliche...

Answer 3

li like it maybe you should another side of the story like the guy side so its likethey both like each other but dont know the does

Answer 4

i like it despite what the dude above said...it appeals to my taste

Answer 5

its sad, but its really good... kinda like my situation :/...

Answer 6

i think if you made that into a song it would sound really nice.

Answer 7

Your poem sounds great - keep up the good work!