Do you think parents are to blame for out of control teens?

Question

I'm 1 of 9 and my parents forsaked us, left us in the New York foster care system where I've experienced physical, verbal, and sexual abuse. I'm 23 today and yesterday morning I was running from the police to avoid jailtime afer a fight. In my opinion YES parents are to blame for out of control teens.

Answer 1

in some views yes they are and in some views no they not. Some even blame teachers. Some parents nowadays didn't have time to spend time with their children because of works so they depands fully on teachers. for parents who didn't play their role as "parents" they didn't deserve to have children. I mean Teacher als a parents you know what i mean? So for the question you aked, yes Parent are the one that responsible o Teens misbehave. it ussually hapend in the wealthy family. For a mederate Family when they got lots of time with parents and children, it didn't happen that much of teen misbehave. Unless if the parents do their roles but the teens itself didn't toke the advice it was teens faults.

Answer 2

No, I have 4 girls, 3 of them are darlings and 1 is an ********!

Answer 3

Absolutely!

Answer 4

I think you just answered your own question, and YES any out of control kid is the parent's fault because it is the parent's who need to stop being friends and start doing their job.

Answer 5

Absolutely!!!! So many parents are focused on working and their own free time the kids get forgotten in the mix and are left to fend for theirselves.  I'm sorry about your situation and what your parents have done to you.  But you are an adult now and resposible for your actions be a better person don't repeat the cycle

Answer 6

now days ,yes!because, i say this is only from experience.their is no discipline in the home anymore,the kids literally get by with anything.they are spoiled,and have no respect for authority or anyone else!

Answer 7

well ****...sorry to hear that. No one deserves to be treated like you have and I pray that you find some solace somewhere in your life. I was a very troubled teen and I had a rough upbringing but even after my family got straightened out I still went astray. I do agree that it has alot to do with the parents but some just wonder off into the wrong group of friends or find there own trouble.

I see the the generations around me are alot different from when I grew up and I thought it was bad then. Parents these days have to own up to their responisibilities and the teens these days need to pipe it down a little bit. Its like everyone is out of control. So sad and so is your story so take care and hope this helped. :)

Answer 8

Not always.  Some kids, no matter how much love, time, fair amount of dicipline, effort, activities or communication you give them go wild for a period of time. For some, they get in with the wrong crowd and the peer pressure or excitement of being a party animal or criminal gets the better of them. For some they just go psycho for some reason (could be mental problems, hormone imbalance, traumatic event in their lives in which the parent had no control etc.), some just want to try and test everything and try it out of curiosity and end up getting sucked into bad habits (like drug and alcohol abuse, self mutilation, promiscuous s*x, fighting, crime, etc.). Society can also be an overwhelming and huge factor. How many kids use the excuse "well EVERYONE ELSE is doing it!!" Sometimes everything you see in society would have to completely believe that it's true.   Adolescence is a very difficult time for kids and parents. Always has been and no child or parent is totally perfect.

A lot of parents, for many reasons as well are unable to help their children due to their hands being tied for legal and other reasons.  For example, my parents got into serious trouble with a psychiatrist for "invading my privacy" for reading my diaries, eventhough they found out I was being molested by a neighbor and reported it to the police.  They also found out I was suicidal and got me into therapy (where the counseller told them that they were bad parents for "invading my privacy"). I was pretty pissed that she read my diary at the time, but now that I am a parent, I think they did the right thing. I feel really bad that parents get blamed for everything no matter what they do. Many are only trying to reach out and help their kids and only end up with blame and shame when things go wrong.

Answer 9

No - do you think that if parents really had that much control, there would be so many kids in trouble? The majority of parents that I know seem to do most things right, i.e., they love their kids (and tell them so), are involved in their lives and activities, support their dreams, try to help them develop responsibility, and openly communicate their values.  Some kids get into trouble anyway, perhaps due to influence of peers or the media.  You can be the best parent in the world, but you cannot control your children all the time, especially as they move into adolescence.  There comes a point where they make their own choices, and they don't always choose wisely.  All we can do is keep the lines of communication open and hope that eventually they will see the light.  If it doesn't happen, don't blame yourself - you've done the best you could - and let your child know you they can still turn to you for help no matter what.

Answer 10

This is a tricky question.  It depends on the living situation.  If it's a single parent home it is difficult for the parent to be aware of everything going on in their child's life.  My mother was a single parent to 3 children.  She worked 2-3 jobs my entire life to keep a roof over our head, food on the table, and clothes on my back.  Between 3 kids the only thing she had time to be involved in was our grades and teaching us responsibility through chores around the house.  She disciplined us but, I still took advantage of the time she wasn't at the house to do things I shouldn't have.  

Now it's different in my opinion if the child has 2 parents who both work.  This way both parents have the time to get involved in their kids lives.  At this point if the children are out of control I do believe a lot of the blame rests on the parents.  A lot of parents just don't discipline their kids.  Now there are a lot of methods of discipline but, whatever the method a person chooses if they are not consistent with it then it doesn't work.  I personally believe this is why a lot of teens are out of control, because their parents never taught them structure through discipline.

Answer 11

Majority of it...but consider some factors such us environment etc...

Answer 12

In some cases it is - but as a parent you can do all the right things as far as teaching your kids but when they get old enough to make their own decisions they can make all the wrong ones.

I think in your case your parents would be to blame, but you do reach an age where you have to stop using your past as an excuse to continue to make wrong decisions - you are at an age where you know the right things to do - take control of your life and don't let your past hold you back.

Answer 13

no

Answer 14

That's a very black and white question. You can not across the board say that all parents are responsible for all out of control teens. That said I do think a lot of teens with problems have parents who simply have not invested the time and effort in them that could have made them better people. A lack of interest in what your child does, where they are, who their friends are has got to contribute to them becoming out of control. Young adults need guidance and support and their parents should be the primary givers of this. Somebody who feels nobody cares what happens to them is much more likely to show the same regard to others and their property. It is not rocket science. Obviously we are talking about people here so you cannot say that applies to everybody. Some people have grown up very well despite their parents and others who had parents who invested all their time and effort in them have landed locked up in prison for years!!

Obviously where abuse is involved it is a different matter. That stuff messes people up and is just out and out wrong. If you have been abused you need to talk to somebody qualified to deal with it - even if you think you don't you do. Sorry for the way your life has gone so far but don't let it make you a victim forever - use it to make you stronger and more determind to make something of yourself.

Answer 15

90% is parenting

Answer 16

Social environment is a bigger factor now than of old.