Do you think that I was too harsh on my daughters?

Question

Yesterday morning, I went to the bathroom to put on my make-up, when I realized all my blush and cover-up was gone. Well, I have two daughters, ages 6 and 8. They said they were playing with their favorite Barbie's in their room, having a funeral. Apparently they had rubbed a black velvet cloth onto their noses (since the Barbie's were crying) and it made the noses black.

So, they had this idea to use my make-up to try to get it off, without asking me. I yelled at them for using all my blush and cover-up... and they cried. I feel horrible.

Should I have been more understanding? Was I too harsh?

Answer 1

I wouldn't have yelled at them for that....tell them next time they are not to touch your things unless they have your permission.  You should apologize for overreacting and just stress that they need to ask permission first.

Answer 2

You reacted, no big deal. You might tell them after that you were sorry to have yelled but you were very angry. Tell them you yell when you get upset but that its not because you don't love them.

I'm sure you've explained the need for them to ask and about your private items. So no harm done and hopefully they learned a lesson.

Answer 3

dont worry

u were not too harsh but next time tell them wht they did wrong cuz dey r kids

and kids dont understand evrything

lolz

Answer 4

It's always easy to look back on the situation and know that you could've handled it better.  At ages 6 & 8, I feel they should've known better than to play in your makeup, but at the same time...they're still kids.  So maybe you could talk to them about it.  Tell them that you are sorry for upsetting them and making them cry, but what they did is going to end up costing you money because you'll have to replace your makeup.  Talking to them and explaining the situation is probably the best thing to do. :o)

Answer 5

Yes, you were really harsh. Makeup can be bought and if you really didn't want them to use it, you should've kept it in a place they couldn't reach or find.

Answer 6

you had a sudden reaction to not being asked to use something of yours and it was used for a seemingly silly reason. tell your girls that you arent all that mad and you can pick up some more make up at the store. but the next time they need to borrow something, they need to ask first.

Answer 7

No, you are fine.  They should've asked.  Fast forward 10 years, what if they borrowed the car and didn't ask?  Sorry but reality check.  They should learn to ask before borrowing things that aren't theirs.  It is a lesson and they will forgive you.  Yelling is one thing, hitting would be unacceptable.

They still love you and always will.

Answer 8

no they need to understand there are boundaries. What if it was a knife or medicine or whatever

Answer 9

Yelling never accomplishes anything. You need to explain to them that this was your property and they should not have touched it without your permission. Then, you could have taken their Barbie dolls and told them that you will hold onto them for a day so they can learn not to touch your stuff again. Yes, they need to learn. Yelling does not teach anything, though.

Answer 10

Well, maybe yelling at them was a little too harsh, but you needed to explain to them somehow that they were playing with grown-ups make-up and that they mustn't play around with your make-up - if they wanted some help to stop the Barbie's nose being black, they should have asked you for help.  Then an apology from them, a hug from you, and everything is hunky dory.  Something like that.  

We all yell sometimes, though, even over the smallest things, but I can guarantee you that they've completely forgotten about it now, so don't feel bad.  You know for next time now.

One thing though - they were playing funeral - is everything alright with them?

Answer 11

You were probably really annoyed with what they were doing and you were right to be upset about their taking your belongings without asking.  Shortly, you should talk to them about why you were upset.  After you discuss it you can promise that you wont' yell if they promise not to take (steal) your stuff.

Answer 12

Well, you're not the first mom to wig out over kids getting into her stuff. Frankly, if the makeup was expensive, then I'd be much more put out than if it were cheap.

This is one of those 'kid moments' where it obviously never occured to them to ask. You just have to stress that from now on.

Apologize for being harsh and then practice not overreacting next time....and there will be a next time.

Answer 13

i dont think you were they need to know they cant touch your stuff and that makeup is expensive if you had slapped them then it would of been harsh

Answer 14

No they have to know that when something is not theirs they have toa ask first. Sit down and tell them u love them but they are expected to respect your privacy and stuff.

Answer 15

no