Do you think that this is a good jump off point for a novel's first chapter? I'm writing an amateur novel?

Question

I awoke only as one would expect from a drunkard; disoriented and completely void of emotion with only a pittance of value to my sullen existence. This morning was as any other; exponentially expanding feelings of self pity and doubt kept me from returning to a world where I contributed to the monotonous and self destructive human race.

Answer 1

A lot of of people may like it, that paragraph just doesn't attract ME. I may be the only one, though.

Too many big random words in there that kind of make the reader just skip through it. I guess it depends for what type of audience you're writing for.

Answer 2

ye looks good  

Answer 3

DANNGG thats soo good!!

It gets me hooked!

Excellent vocabulary!

It makes me want to read on further!

Fabulaus start, and good luck with the rest of your book! (:

Answer 4

One word: Wow. I think this is an excellent opening for a novel; I would definitely read it.

Answer 5

Not bad but you're using too extensive a vocabulary which almost seems like you're trying too hard. A few strong words are good, too many looks bad.  

Answer 6

It's waaaaay too wordy.

Don't try so hard. It looks like you've been rifling through the dictionary too much.

But other than that, yeah, good start.

Answer 7

Well, it reads well, but it's often considered a good idea to see how things like this read minus a few adjectives and adverbs.  Let's have a look!  I hope you don't mind a little creative license on my part.

"I awoke as one would expect from a drunkard; void of emotion with little value to my existence.  This morning was as any other; feelings of self pity and doubt kept me from returning to a world where I contributed to the self destructive human race."

Obviously some had to stay in to maintain any sense of the passage, but I think it's an interesting experiment.  I have critiques:  Consider eliminating one semicolon.  Also consider actually leaving out some of the adjectives.

I'm curious about your decision to use the first person, but I'm not going to suggest that you do otherwise.

Answer 8

Yeah. As far as opening paragraphs go, i think is really good. but i would use smaller vocabulary words than you are now. It sounds like something I would read though.  

Answer 9

You explain things really well and that is a very good thing. I also like writing amateur novels but I can never seem to explain things as good as people like you. I'm sure your book will be amazing if you keep writing like that. I wouldn't let up on your large vocabulary at all, I love reading books that explain things like you are there.