Do you think there is some type of attraction between us?

Question

I am friends with a married man. I didn’t know that he was married at first but he later told me that he is married and he just want to be friends because he enjoys my company. I was down about it because I seemed to have gotten the wrong idea. He always complements me and he calls me using a public pay phone to just talk. He does this on his break when he is working.

I invited him to my place before he told me that he is married but him still willing to get together sometime and hang out. I didn't talk to him for 2 weeks because I was trying to distance myself from him but I just couldn’t take it anymore. I missed him.

So I decided to go back to visit him yesterday. He was happy to see me. We just talked as normal. Just talking to him is enough for me. It makes my day. He is coming to visit me at my place sometime to just chat and listen to music

He spends 50 cents using a bell pay phone just to call me and talk to me. So if there isn’t any attraction why would he spend money to call me? I know 50 cents is not a lot but it all adds up in the end.

So is it true that for a female and a male to be friends there has to be some type of attraction for them to carry on a friendship?

Answer 1

Stop now because your feelings for him are just going to grow and get stronger and you will end up doing something totally stupid and mean and you will regret it.

Cut off all ties!

he calls you from pay phones so his wife wont see

not because he doesn't mind paying the 50 cents!

If you continue with this after all the advice and warnings you are getting...you are nothing but a "homewrecker". Maybe that word will help you realize what you are doing.

on the other hand this guy is not worth it. He knows very well that what he is doing is wrong. My husband knows better than to be talking on public phones or cell phones with any female friend to have conversations. Nevertheless going to her house to listen to music. If his wife found out she would be sooo hurt. He is deceiving his wife and he's a loser...is this really attractive to you. You have issues!

Answer 2

Because he is doing this to his wife now, what is stopping him from doing this to you if he ends it with his wife for you?

dont be a homewrecker. there are plenty of good people to talk to who are not married.

I actually hope his wife finds out and leaves this guy

Answer 3

YOU ARE PLAYING WITH FIRE! Stop calling this man, stop answering his phone calls, and stop inviting him over. How would you feel if you were married and some other woman was inviting your husband to her house? You'd be angry, and I bet his wife would be too.

Being an adult means that sometimes we have to make decisions that don't necessarily make us "happy" because they are the right thing to do. Move on and find a guy who you enjoy spending time with who isn't married.

Answer 4

He's using a pay phone so his wife does not find out, that's deceit.  Perhaps there is an attraction, but put yourself in the shoes of his wife, how would you like it if your man was chatting up another woman.  be the grown up here and leave him alone, nothing good can come of this, either he will cheat on his wife which shows he is not to be trusted anyway, or he will leave you heart broken, either way you lose.

Answer 5

you asked this question the other day?  what, you cannot stand hearing that you are an idiot for being with a married man?

Answer 6

OK, please listen to what I'm saying.  Of course there is an attraction there...or else he wouldn't be calling you on a secret phone.  He doesn't want to risk his wife seeing his calls to you on his cell phone.  So here's the question:  does that feel good to you?  How would you feel if your man were calling another woman behind your back?  You've got to understand that the feelings you have are about the thrill of dating someone who's unavailable.  Obviously there are some problems in his marriage, but it's up to him to deal with them, work them out, or call it quits before getting involved with anyone else.  Please don't become the other woman, don't do this to yourself, him, and his wife.  Nothing good can come of it.  Tell him you can't talk with him anymore and end the call.  If he pursues you, hang up.  You'll miss him for a while but will soon realize you've done the right thing.

Answer 7

Dont you think its a lil funny that he uses a payphone to call you? Maybe its because he doesnt want his WiFe to know that he is talking to another woman. Seems to me like hes fixin to have an affair and youre kinda nieve to think it would be anything other than that.

if i were you, id take the ego boost and walk away.  if this guy would do this to his wife, im sure itll be that much easier to play you as well. and remember, karma is a bytch.

Answer 8

if you are falling in love with a married man. STOP talking to him. he might just want to be friends but what you are saying is something totally differant. he is hiding something from someone as well as hiding you from someone. Do you want to be hidden away like that?

Answer 9

First of all, he's probably using a pay phone so that nobody finds out he's calling you.  Does this man have a cell phone or a phone at work that he could be using, and he chooses not to? Red Flag right there.

And secondly, coming from a married woman, I'd back off before you get into something too deep.  Chances are slim that he'll leave his wife for another woman, and chances are high that you'll be the one who gets hurt in the end.  You also run the risk of being labeled as a home-wrecker if anyone finds out your true feelings.

It's true that men and women, married or otherwise, can just be friends, but not when you can openly admit that you have feelings for that person.  Then it goes beyond that and you should get out while you can.