Do you think this is an unfair punishment ?

Question

There is a father who if he sees that his children have left toys out and not put them away he takes the toys and gets rid of them in order to teach them responsibility ... Would you say this is fair or just him over compensating for feelings of inadequacy .

Answer 1

Not getting rid of them, no. That is a bit too much.

It may drive home the point, but it might be the wrong point

Answer 2

That's perfectly fair, especially if the kids have been told repeatedly to put away their toys.

Answer 3

on one of the nanny shows, that's what they did to teach the kids not to leave their stuff on the floor. and they didn't by the end of the week.

Answer 4

Well how old is the kid? b/c i think that could make a SLIGHT difference...

I think if the kid is older than 5 or 6 maybe but even for any age that's a harsh punishment he should just put them away for the day rather than throw them out forever.

So if anything do a clean-up routine before he goes to bed which in our case will actually be a bed-time routine. and eventually he or she will learn.

that's all it takes with children repetition anything else is just laziness.

Answer 5

I would only use this as a last resort.  The kids will resent this kind of treatment and it can create as many problems as it solves.

Answer 6

when i've told my son to pick his toys up and i know he hasn't done it i tell him "ok I'm going to go look and if there are any on the floor they're going in the garbage" I threw one toy away and have never had to do it again. his room is spotless and he's only 3. before i started this you couldn't even walk in the door of his room because they were all over the floor and every weekend along with cleaning my whole house i had to clean his room up also and i finally got tired of it. i made him help me clean up all his toys and we gave away the ones he didn't play with anymore or had outgrown and i told him that he had to keep it clean. that if i saw any toys on the floor and he wasn't playing with them that they were going bye bye.

Answer 7

I wouldn't do that, but if I was constantly telling the child to put his/her toys away, I would tell them that if they didn't I was going to give them away at Goodwill or the Salvation Army because some needy child might appreciate them more. That threat would be enough for my daughter, I'm sure.

Answer 8

That's EXACTLY how I handled my kids, and I even took it a step further when my son decided he was going to "clean" his room by throwing all of his stuff behind his entertainment center.

I made him do this thing called "moving out of the barracks". basically moving all his stuff out the house into the backyard and setting it up the way it should've been in the house. Clean and organized. Once finished, I made him move back in. His room stays spotless now.

Edit:

I understand that they're gone for good. Regardless of what they are. He kept leaving his PSP around the house and I asked him not too....its now in a landfill somewhere.

Answer 9

This is something that mom and dad did when I was growing up.  Granted they simply put the toys up in a box for a long, LONG time.  I think it's pretty fair.  If a child has been told to pick up and they refuse and leave the toys out, then they must not appreciate or respect their property.  I would give them to someone who does appreciate it, someone who does not have these nice toys and are not as privileged as my children are.  

I can't say I think it's wrong.  And no I don't believe the father is compensating for feelings of inadequacy...that's a silly thought.  He is teaching them responsibility and respect for their things.

Answer 10

My sister did that..but she didn't throw them away.  Just bagged them up in a big black garbage back so that they thought she did.  They stopped leaving things about after about three weeks.  

After a week went by without anything left out she gave them back with the warning that next time the bag would go to the curb.  

That worked too...and she didn't end up with a house full of kids that had no toys.  THAT would drive her more crazy than the toys left about...since then they'd be in her hair all of the time, with nothing to do! ;)

Answer 11

Our rule is that if I have to ask three times, it gets taken away. Most of the time we don't get 'rid' of them, we just stick up in a box in the closet, that the children don't realize is there.  It teaches the child action and consequences, but I believe you should at least ask the child to put it away first and state the consequence if they choose not to.

Answer 12

i feel its wrong i wouldn't get RID of them just hide them until they learn but they are kids what do you expect the parents should have taught them better it pretty much his own fault why they are i guess lazy

Answer 13

yeah it's pretty fair but eventually after I feel as if they have learned I would give the toys back.

Answer 14

It's a fantastic idea.  It teaches children responsibility and consequences, as well as provides toys for those who may be less fortunate.

Sometimes the less conventional methods of "punishment" are the most successful.

Answer 15

I think it's a great idea!

Answer 16

One the first offense, it wouldn't be fair. But if they do it over and over then yes. A better way would be to hide the toys, say your getting rid of them, and then give them back at a later date.