Do you think we expect too much? ?

Question

This is a question for men and women.

When it comes to romantic relationships, do you think we expect too much? I have read a few articles, and always about 50 percent of men cheat on their wife/girlfriends. Marriages don't last as long anymore. Do you think that maybe what we look for in a relationship is unrealistic? Is it possible for a marriage to last without at least one incident of infidelity?

Answer 1

People are more interested in weddings than they are in marriages.

Answer 2

It certainly is possible with mutual love and respect and communication.  If you pick the right person to be your life long partner, you are not expecting too much for that person to be faithful.

Answer 3

you are assuming that today's women are moral and upright..

that's a big stretch

in fact

more and more women are cheating

at higher rates

as they have become empowered and figure why not

after all men do it with little to no consequences

but as for unrealistic

that depends on what you have to offer

and what is you shopping list for the guy

most of the time it way out of balance

with the women wanting it all and having little in return to offer

as if they are some magic women or something

it does not help that most women buy into the hollywood style of romance

where every good looking guy magically falls for the wall flower girl

the truth is most marriages have poor foundations

hence why the fail at such alarming rates

most marriage end in divorce becuase one or the other person is themselves a child of divorce

and as such has not learn a proper 2 household upbringing

to teach them proper morals and core values

so they grow up selfish and thinking of themselves

eventually they marry but cease to drop the me attitude

sooner or later the other person in the marriage does not like what he see, and thus cheats or eventually divorces

it rare that people take the proper time to know themselves.. and then their future spouse... and then life plan

very rare

hence why the saying goes you really do not someone

until after they leave you

Answer 4

Yes, it's possible. Married people go through having crushes and fantasies about other people but they don't act on it.  

Answer 5

I think that when the vow says for better or worse than that committment stands.  If the person gambles away the house payment, wrecks the car, sleeps with someone else.  Thats the commitment that you made and it should be honored.  

You should really, really know that person before you decide to marry them.  NOBODY is Perfect.  And to think that you can just divorce someone because they made a mistake is not right.  

Answer 6

You get what you give...bottom line. It may not be so obvious but its there. There are certain things that lead to circumstances, thus leading to other things, and etc.

I demand love, respect, attention, affection, s*x, because those are some of the things that I give.

My parents have been together for 44 years. Been married 39 of those years. And neither one of them has cheated or has had an affair. Everyone whom is married in my family...and they all have been married for longer then 10 years...none of them have cheated or had affairs. The married men that I work with, one has been married for 25 years...he has never cheated or had an affair. He is completely in love with his wife. And then there is a single man whom is 37 that I work with, he has broken up at least 9 marriages..so it was the wife that was cheating. And we all know them. Its very sick if you ask me.

I think that if you are with the right person...soul mates if you may, then there will never be any kind of cheating.

This is why you need to keep your marriage, healthy, fun, interesting, wild, passionate, silly, creative, supportive, respectful, giving, caring, sponatneous, romantic, loving, growing...people get comfortable. And you can't. You just can't.

Answer 7

Yes  

Answer 8

Yes but they are rare.

Answer 9

I think its possible to not have an infidelity incident. In my opinion cheating is a PARTLY a character issue. I could go on and on about that forever though.  I think humans are not a loyal race anymore. Children aren't being raised with decent morals and values either. Cheaters are selfish and only think of themselves in the moment and not the ones they hurt.

Answer 10

I think it is possible.  My wife and I have been married 14 years without infidelity.  I don't think the problem today is too high expectations.  I think the problem is it is too easy to get a divorce and people are unwilling to work at their problems.  Also, the media portrayal of family life shows it not as stable.  Infidelity is glamorized and made to seem exciting without all the personal tragedy and damaged lives.

I think another problem is that men haven't adjusted to women working.  Now that women are working outside the home men don't put in enough in childcare and helping with housework.  Also, women have enough financial independence that they don't have to stay if they don't want too.

Answer 11

I think, these days people tend to see marriage as disposable. They think: if it doesn't work out, we'll just get a divorce.  Marriage takes a lot of work and people need to only get married if they are willing to do the work that it takes, and know that the person they are marrying are also willing to do that work.  It's not easy...but we are a lazy generation that looks for convenience.