Doctors, do you really care for your patients?

Question

Read this ALL before you answer plz.

I'm not saying you don't care and I KNOW you've spent years and years training just to help other people and cure other people's diseases, but what really comes to mind when you have to tell a kid "you have cancer" or tell their parents they could die or "you'll never be the same again"? I know there are some really, really nice doctors and some that do care, but I also know that some don't care as well. It just depends on who it is. A family member of mine got raped by a doctor because there were no nurses in the room and obviously they didn't check to see if there were, and she is fine now and she sued the doctor, but the doctor got his job back. I have a male doctor and I can't even go in the room alone without one of my parents because i'm scared.

I just want to know what you think of this and what do you think of your patients? All answers are appreciated and PLZ no rude answers..

btw, I'm NOT calling you a bad doctor so don't say I am

Answer 1

I am very sorry for your friend, its too bad that had to happen.

I can't add much to the other answers except to point out that the most sought after residencies are: dermatology, plastic surgery, orthopedic surgery, and radiology. They have one thing in common and its not the joy of helping people, its making a lot of money while working desirable hours.

Answer 2

Standing ovation for Carol B!

Some patients we like, some we don't.  We're human.  We're not going to like everybody.  At least I get to put most of my patients to sleep.

I care very well FOR my patients, and I care ABOUT many of them.  Like Carol, it's hard to feel a lot of sympathy for people who spend years NOT caring about their own health, but expect you to bend over backward to accommodate them, often for little payment and no gratitude.

Do NOT start whining about your IV if you have 6 tattoos and a bolt through your tongue.  It's just not going to fly with me.

I love my OB patients, my little old ladies, and most of my other patients.

Answer 3

I'm a female doctor. Please don't be offended by my opinion, it is only meant to offer you some insight into docs world. I have been a patient myself so I have been exposed to both sides. I'll try to address your question, here goes.

I have to say that it's really hard for me to take your friend's word for it. Firstly, because from the second we step foot into our office or hospital our stress level is crazy high. Think about the highest level of stress that you have ever experienced--it's that draining. We are being pulled in multiple direction by our patients,nurses,insurance companies,pharmacists,physical therapists,physician assistants, etc. We have 15 minutes to obtain a complete medical history/physical exam and diagnose/treat illness, not to mention the return to work form the patient wants/the medical necessity letter the insurance company wants (to pay for the pill the you need--even though, more than half the time, our patients are spending $5/day on cigaretts and can afford the one week supply of antibiotics or the blood pressure medication that costs $10 per month), the referral forms we have to fill out (for a subspecialist to see you, like for mammograms, colonoscopies, nutritionist etc), the refill form we have to fax to the pharmacists for you to get your refill, the 2 pages of documentation on your office visit, so we can pay our overhead bills, not to mention the constant interruptions by our nurses, and physcian assistants. They come in on our office every 5-10 minutes interrupting our history and physicla exam. So with our terrible schedules/requirements/paperwork and life/death decisions that we make on a daily basis, it's very improbable that this doc was "turned on". Not that we don't see you guys as humans but the degree of stress that each office visit provokes is too much for words. In our training, we hear horror stories about patients accusing docs of rape just to get their money. I'm not saying this is your friends case since I was not in that examining room. The doctor would have to be stupid to give up 12 yrs of training and their livelihood, not to mention how would he then pay off the $200,000 student loans that we all have.

To answer your question about if we care "for" our patients, I think the majority of us care very well "for" our patients. Meaning, we want what is best for all of our patients and we will act responsibly and recommend evidence-based practices. To that end, we will guide patients toward a healthier lifestyle and medical/dietary compliance. This does not mean that we care "about" our patients. For instance, I care about my family, my fiance,  and my close friends. As doctors, we separate ourselves emotionally from our patients, so we can make better decisions in their care. I have to say, we are pretty tired of having patients with chronic medical conditions who expect us to perform miracles when they have smoked half their life, are morbidly obese, sedentary, and don't take their meds. The families are the worst, most often the most neglectful kids will be the loudest in the hospital when their parents (who they haven't seen in months or years) are ill. We see this so often, that docs are just "burnt" out. Don't get me wrong, I would not give up what I do but it is super stressful and very demanding personally.