Does It Surprise You How Quick People Are To Throw Terms Like...???

Question

Autism, ADHA, Bipolar, etc around?? Especially for children.

I know a lot of people have children who have some of these traits, but I also know how much time goes into diagnosing them.

I was reading a question about a Parent asking on how to deal with their child's emotion problems. People were answering with *he has Bipolar*.

I have Bipolar and it just isn't that simple, it took over 12 months of appointments for the doctors to diagnose me.

Then we have the ones, where they are asking about speech and whatever, and people jump in with *He is Autistic*.

Is anyone else surprised how quick people to say these kind of things??

Answer 1

Totally agree with Rouge and Cute mum

9/10 it is people who have no experience in such matters, who are the first to say "he/she must have this or that"

I myself was teased and bullied a LOT as a child, both for being overweight and for needing hearing aids.

This lead to a very low self esteem, (undiagnosed) depression, and coming as close to suicide as possible (without actually pulling the trigger)

These days I still am not comfortable in many situations, don't like crowds, and still have many "doubts" about myself.

Of course, now I am married, to a beautiful girl, who is "labelled" (god i hate that word)

"obsessive schizophrenic with paranoia traits",

who developed catatonic post natal depression after the birth of our son, which has now developed into obsessive compulsion disorder. ( what a mouth full hey)

What I'm getting at is I know very well how people will nod their heads and "agree" that "oh the poor girl has this or the poor girl has that"

I have faced it for much of my life- and now i see people doing it to my wife. People "assume" they know all about PND or schizophrenia or OCD, and some even offer "advice".

All to often they have ABSOLUTELY NO FRIGGING IDEA.

Answer 2

I'm not surprised.  People have always been quick to jump on the newest, coolest, most trendy bandwagon.  Some examples are  herbal remedies, diet fads, not telling children the word "no" and and no punishments for children, recycling, vegetarianism......The list goes on and on and not all of them are bad.

I agree with your point that it IS sad that people are quick to assume a child has a mental issue.  In a lot of cases, they night just need some good old fashioned "parenting"!

Answer 3

It's very surprising, and very sad. ADD, ADHD, and "retarded" could probably be called the worst of the problem, but people definitely are way too quick to just say "He's retarded." Because, most likely, he isn't.

Answer 4

I guess people do throw them around a lot quicker than years ago but I think sometimes it feels better to know that there is a reason or a name for something rather than not having any answers. Once you can put a label on it, then maybe you can do something about helping/treating the issue.

For years my doctor told me I had something wrong with me, but she wasn't able to give it a neat label because my symptoms weren't bad enough and so nothing could be done about it, if they didn't actually diagnose anything. Then after having my son, my health got a lot worse very quickly. I was then diagnosed with Systemic Lupus Erythematosus (Lupus) and am now able to be treated for it and be better looked after by a Rheumatologist.

Answer 5

It suprised me at first but u see so many pple saying it now i just dont bother paying attention..........

NOBODY has the right to tell a parent especially over the internet that there child has a certain disease or imparement...

As u stated it takes many doctors appointment and many doctors to diagnose a child.........

People are very small minded and some people just jump to the conclusion that a child has an imparement and they dont consider that a child just might be a lil behind their peers...

Answer 6

Too be perfectly honest, no.

As bad as it is, the world has descended to such a level where generalizations, stereotypes and defamation.

If someone is seen to have rapidly changing moods, a stupid person might say he's a schitzo. A slightly more educated stupid person might say he's got bi-polar. Personally, I ask what his name is and whether he wants to go grab a beer and tell me whats up. Even though I don't drink beer. But alot of people do. But I don't. MOVING ON.

I think people need to learn to accept people. Not accept face value, or stereotypes. I'm a massive believer in "At least he's hearts in the right place" Because I believe bad people are bad people, but most of the time it's just a good person doing a bad thing. I always try to look deeper than face value.

Anyways, That's my deep and meaningful for you.

Axe

Note: Watch this question VERY carefully, This could show you the overall level of intelligence circulating Yahoo Answers at the moment :D

Answer 7

Yes I agree with you. Especially the schools these days are telling parents that they believe that some kid needs to go the Dr. b/c they think he or she has ADHA or ADD, and why b/c they are a little disruptive or they are a bit slower than the rest of the class in learning. BLAH I say....I say its all about putting the child on meds. to calm him down with is wrong, wrong, wrong.. have you ever seen a child on Riddlin? pretty pathetic, and it will never happen to my children... I am glad that you have your Bipolar under control, I trust you are taking your meds. to help you live a healthy lifestyle...If I may, what do you take? Zyban, or welbuitran, or is there another med out now for Bipolar. good luck to you and I agree with 1000000000000000000 %

Answer 8

I know what you mean..

I have bipolar and OCD..

Took 6 months of my life before they could say 100% what I have.

But then the mother and father's who have children with real problems are being pushed aside for these people who feed there children to much red cordical .

Answer 9

I have used the "Autistic" card with my son, but with fair reason. He is 19 months, doesn't speak, has very very bad tantrums and can be generally unco-operative. But I also know that he has to over two to be diagnosed and it is highly unlikely because of other traits he displays. He is still affectionate and cuddly, he smiles and tries to interact. But after a week straight of 5-10 tantrums a day lasting over half an hour at a time I was thinking that there was something seriously wrong with my boy. Apparently he is having issues with separation anxiety and temper control issues............still very confusing to me after having a daughter who is pretty even tempered and understanding.

I can understand why people are quick to throw labels around, it is easier to have a name for behaviour than "I don't know what is wrong!". But majority of the terms used do have to be diagnosed over the course of lots of time, different tests and quite often different practitioners to get an idea of the whole picture.

Then the other side is a parent has a seriously uncontrollable child, has done everything and is at her wits end, accepts her lot and tries to make the best of it. Finds out at 7 that her child has ADHD, or even something simpler like dyslexia and if she had of sought out help for the behaviour then the child could have been helped a whole lot earlier.

My partner has Dyslexia and spent his whole life at school being told that he was stupid, dumb and ignorant. If the teachers had of taken the time to look into the problems not brush it off as "behavioural" then he would have stood a better chance at a good education. By the time a teacher realised what the issue was the damage had been done.

I really get what you are saying, sometimes it is good for these terms to be "thrown around" at lest parents have some ammo to go to a Doctor or specialist with and ask for answers.

Answer 10

not at all...

These "terms" make the parent feel like the behavior of the child is NOT THEIR FAULT.

I once met an "AUTISTIC" child who got smacked hard, in the back of the head when he spoke up.

Yeah... he's autistic - and his parents are APPROPRIATE.

Answer 11

No I'm not surprised cause unfortunately I'm one of them,but only if the symptoms sound like Autism,only because my son has Autism and I was lucky enough for someone to pin point that to me when my son was 2....I usually say they should get tested for it first before saying that they actually have it.I do know the characteristics of Autism but that's about it.I would never suggest someone is bipolar or depressed and so on,cause I have no experience in those areas.

Answer 12

Yeah it disgusts me actually! Especially the parents who throw those terms around and then label their kids with everything and anything they can think of without any proper diagnosis and without thinking about the consequences for their kids!

Answer 13

Yes I am. Something else which surprises and annoys me is when a parent claims that their child has autism or aspergers or is bipolar etc, because they are too lazy to educate/care for/discipline the kid properly.

You in particular will know how difficult living with one (or more) of these conditions can be and it really grips my sh*t when people use these conditions as a cop out for their own indifference as parents.

Answer 14

Some people just want their "2 points" for answering a question. . .giving whatever feasible "answer" that comes to their minds to get it!

I'm more surprised that the people asking these questions rely on non-professionals to get their answers.  It's sort of like shopping:

YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR!

Answer 15

yeah for sure, it's like people actually like to have things wrong with them or their children, like in some subconscience way it makes life more exciting because they get to worry about it and talk about it all the time. I sure as heck won't be quick to welcome problems with my kids when I have 'em.

Answer 16

yeah i agree. and there are many that think their 3 year old must have ADHD and want to know how they can get it diagnosed and their child won't sit still and runs around. Thats what kids do!!

Some just want to put a name to it sometimes so they have an excuse for their bad parenting. Sometimes it is a case of just give your child limits and boundries and they will improve. I know their are definatly real cases of ADHD but it is over diagnosed and there seems to be phases it goes through to what diagnosis is the latest "must have" it was ADHD and then it was Aspergers and now it is Bipolar.

I had a friend say to me once about their grandson that he was naughty, didn't do as he was told and other stuff. Did I think it sounded like ADHD. I told her it sounded like "littlesh*t syndrome" , she pissed herself laughing and said she agreed.

Answer 17

yeah i believe so too, its got to do with just more about what disability they may have, they should look into what foods they are eating that can cause hyperactiveness, and a bit of disapline should be used before even trying to diagnose a child,

not every child that has a behavourial problem has adhd or autism.

maybe a bit of extra attention would go along way with each child

Answer 18

What you describe in terms of quick-fix and over-the-fence diagnosis is absolutely shocking. Even more so is the readiness to medicate kids, which benefits the pharmeceutical companies a lot more than it does the kids. We live in a period when many kids are not given enough parental attention in the first place, and are surrounded by environmental toxins in their everyday life, Not only is there is something wrong with our systems of educating and parenting, but there is something diasterous about an economic system that allows polluters to make piles of money in the market. But until we take a look at all that, we can simply dope up the kids, who are the poor canaries in the coal mine.

Furthermoe, we love labels the way kids love coloured stickers, so we stick them anyplace. Kid throw tantrums? Why deal with it when you can stick on the Bipolar label and go back to watching Dr. Phil?

Answer 19

I think it is and often it is used as an 'excuse' for a child's behaviour or lack of good discipline. Especially over the internet, describing the behaviour of a child can't just be diagnosed that simply. Because children are at such a crucial stage in their lives for learning and adapting, they could show traits of certain 'illnesses' which they might not actually have.

Many times, I've seen parents using this as an excuse for the way their son/daughter has been acting. A child having difficulty expressing and controlling their emotions could simply need a more stable environment and supportive parents and not necessarily have any further issue. I think people are far too critical nowadays and are always looking for something wrong, they will pick up on the smallest insignificant thing and worry about it. Many people don't seem to realise that not all children are the same, some just have developmental delay and some are more emotional than others but are still fine. Jumping to conclusions just complicates matters.

If a child does have a real problem then obviously it can't be dismissed as just the way they are. But I see far too many people telling me that their child is autistic or that their child has ADHD when they haven't even had a formal diagnosis. I know what it is like, especially in children, because my son is bipolar/psychosis at a very young age. It started from him acting strange and differently and developed into lots more things. It took months of seeing children's psychiatrists who asked questions and watched Nathan in a 'natural environment'. He had to have tests done on him and people observing him playing with other children. It took experts analysing everything he said and did, before they even got an idea of what was wrong.

Not only is it unfair on the children when parents jump to conclusions but it's quite offensive to people who go through the whole thing and have a hard time because they really do have an illness.

Answer 20

Because kids have to be perfect.

If their child is different, there has to be a reason.

People can't just have an unsociable child.

They can't just have a child that's more emotional, energetic, clever etc.

There has to be something 'wrong' with them if they're not normal.

A recent study in america said that 75% of boys in the USA have ADHD/ADD. Now if75% of boys have something, it's normal.

Answer 21

Yes, that's why we don't pay these people for their opinion.

Alot of people have no real idea what these terms mean anyway. I have a brother who is clinically diagnosed as Schizophrenic, but popular culture would have people believe it means you have multiple personalities. Which is not true at all, and some people think bipolar means you have multiple personalities, which also isn't true.

There is alot of ignorance out there when it comes to mental illness.

I believe that the ADHD epidemic is a symptom of poor parenting. Where was it 1 or 2 generations ago? Discipline was the best medicine.

Answer 22

Yes because people are always ready to medicate instead of discipline their children. they are only looking for an easy way out. Sorry if that sounds harsh but it is the truth

Answer 23

How quick they "say" them, but more importantly, how quick they are to treat them with meds....I bet a lot of children are just love or attention deprived, so they act up...and BAM....they must have ADHD....!!!!!! Sad....

Answer 24

I am as surprised as you are. The majority of the people in Answers I would assume are NOT DOCTORS and they use these conditions as if they are the answer to every child's problems.

I once read a woman's magazine which was discussing ADHD and it gave a list of 10 things to look out for in your child.... I answered the questions with my son in mind and he got 9/10.  Now I never ever even thought he could have it and took the outcome with a grain of salt.  My son is a happy healthy and very intelligent boy. I only dread to think what he would be if I had piled him up with drugs to curb is 'so called erratic behaviour'.

Kids learn things at their own pace, some are over active and some under active. Let them grow up in their own speed and don't push them into a category simply because someone in Answers said so.

Answer 25

I am guilty of labelling my own child but the title is 'obnoxious brat' and is short lived, whereupon she becomes 'angel'.

I agree society is very quick to label children these days or to find excuses for what boils down to poor parenting and bad behaviour.

This is grossy unfair on those families with children who do have genuine, diagnosed disorders.

Answer 26

Not really, I was told I have ADHD becuase I like never pay attention in class, but thats cause my teachers are all idiots and odn't knwo how to teach.

Answer 27

I agree, these terms are being used way too much and causes a lot of misdiagnosis (I blame lazy doctors and ignorant people)..

When I tell someone my son has a learning disorder they immediately tell me he MUST be autistic etc...

It also makes me angry when ppl assume someone must be bipolar if they have emotional or social problems...its just so d**n ignorant!

All the terms you mentioned seem to be the 'it' words atm :(

Answer 28

Yes, it does surprise me. Unless someone is a doctor and has specifically dealt with the child face to face (i.e. nobody on here qualifies), they have no business making a diagnosis.

That said, I don't think there's anything wrong with saying "those sound like symptoms which can be caused by..." and often people just take a typing shortcut and say "it is..." But I do think we should all be aware that self-diagnosis is a seriously bad idea. It would be awful if someone took that kind of advice as gospel and didn't consult a doctor because they thought they already had the answer.

Answer 29

people dont want to step up and take responsibility for their parenting skills, or lack there of,it couldnt be their fault little johnny is a total brat just because they have given in to his every whim, and never once disciplined him because they might hurt his feelings, or make him mad, so surely he must have something wrong with him to make him act this way, and these are the easiest things to blame since the symptoms are so general,and broad range. and it makes it alot harder for those who actually have it because people on the outside have heard it blamed so many times it seems more like a scapegoat then an honest problem (even though we know it is a very real thing and can be a big problem.)

i had to laugh the other day when i read a certain question.. .. a woman wanted to know if her child was GIFTED because he had behavioral problems  lol...what in the world??!??!

Answer 30

Oh yeah Charli ..i answered a question on here a lady asked a questions stating her daughter was calling her by her name and not mummy and this man said 'Sounds like Autism' id love to know where people get their ideas from, Like with Thomas he has classic autism .. i remember someone asking if he was 'Simple' wow dunno how i kept my cool but i did !

And so many on here saying their child is a little slow to talk and everyone would say autism which i must add is so much deeper than lack of speech !