Does a bridesmaid have to give the bride a card at the wedding?

Question

I was a bridesmaid in a wedding, one of 7.

The woman who got married.. had everything very close together. She had her batchorette party, and 3 showers all in the course of 2 weeks. Then the next weekend was her birthday party, and the weekend after that was the rehersal dinner and the wedding.

I helped chip in 50 bucks for the bachlorette party, bought her 3 nice gifts for all the showers, gave her another cool gift for her birthday (150 bucks) and I bought the wine for the actual wedding ceremony.

She stopped talking to me simply because I didn't give her a card with 20 bucks in it the next day at the present opening. She said I had to because I was a bridesmaid and had to give her well wishes.

Do you think she's being a bit greedy?

Answer 1

Of course she is acting greedy. She should be appreciative that you helped and gave gifts the entire time of her wedding and birthday. I think she is being very selfish and it's too bad that you didn't know she would act like that  earlier.

Answer 2

Yes, she is being greedy.  I'd write her a note and say so.  Tell her you spent close to $300 on her presents, and people aren't all as loaded as she is.  It was especially hard since she insisted on having so many parties close together.  You were lucky you could pay your bills this month.  Also inform her that her greed just lost her a friend.  Then write her off your friends list.

Answer 3

She's being greedy.

Bridesmaids aren't required to give gifts.  They're there to support the bride on her wedding day.  Occasionally, they're on the hook for buying the bridesmaid dress or shoes.  But, they're not required to bring a present, every single time they see the bride.  You gave her your present.  Several of them.

She's selfish, and clearly too wrapped up in the idea that everyone needs to cater to her.  The present opening isn't part of the wedding.  You gave her your love and well wishes at the wedding, at the shower, and at the bachelorette party.  If she's too busy counting who gave her money, and has forgotten about all the other nice things you've done, then she owes you an apology, and maybe its a good thing she's not talking to you anymore, since her friendship clearly isn't worth maintaining.

You're better off.

Answer 4

yes, she is being very greedy. I was a bridesmaid myself, and the bride didn't do anything like that to me. she gave me and the other bridesmaids thank you cards for helping out and such.

Yeah basically that was really greedy of her to say that.

Answer 5

Holy GEEZ!  Some friend huh, well I will tell you, you should have done the card, it did kind of send a message.  I simply would have said I forgot the card at home and then got her one.

Tacky as it sounds each event deserved a gift whether they were grouped together or not.  What was worse her mentioning now that was very tacky.  I am hoping the reason you did not do the card was because of the cost of everything else.  If you felt that she got to much then that was wrong on your part.  If it was for financial reasons on your part mention it to her.  She should understand.

Answer 6

well should could be actuing a little greedy. after all, you did help out a lot and spent a lot of money on her. maybe you could have given her just a card giving her well wishes but i dont think it is neccessary for there to be money in it as well after all you have done for her.

Answer 7

Wow! You were a good bridesmaid and friend to the bride. It seems to me you very,very generous.

A simple card with good wishes would have been nice, but it seems you did everything else fantastically! The wine for the wedding ceremony was your wedding gift.  I think the bride should have kept her mouth shut and thanked you for all you did.

Don't worry about it.

Answer 8

I hope for her sake her husband is an oil billionaire otherwise she is going to land with a bump ..................we can't all keep giving money she chose to get married and invite you onto the party ....................so she should accept you have given what you can both in time and money ......................

and i think she is being more than a bit greedy i think mega greedy

hope she gets you all good gift for being bridesmaids   and something nice for her and his parents ....................glad I'm in the UK and we don't do all this pre wedding stuff..........