Does anyone else find it surprising that my baby has never been babysat?

Question

My little girl will be 6 months old in 10 days, and whenever I see one of my friends she always asks if she's been babysat yet. Since she is strictly breastfed, it is a little hard to be away from her. And when I tell her this, she always says I do need time for myself too. I don't feel this is true, so I just tell her that I made the choice to have a baby and that it is my responsibility to care for her. Is this surprising to anyone, or has anyone else experienced this?

Answer 1

No, of course not - we were the same with our son - and I'm sure you will hear from many other answerers who say the same.

Gee, I'm not even sure of the first time he had someone else look after him - I'm sure over two, when I would have to go for medical treatments I would leave him for an hour twice a week with a trusted friend.

And the little dude didn't sleep through the night til a week before his first birthday!

Glad things are going well!

Answer 2

nope, my son is 16 months old and hasnt been away from either me or my husband.  

Answer 3

I think it is fine either way.  When my son was 5 months I spent a weekend away (I had plenty of expressed milk).  He was just fine and mommy and daddy got to spend some quality alone time together (which is hard with a 3 year old and a 6 month old.

Answer 4

Hello.If you are happy with this there is nothing wrong.Maybe when she sleeps all night and you feel ready you could go out for a couple of hours.

Answer 5

no it's not surprising. if i didnt work my son would have went 9 motnhs without a babysitter since that was the first time i ever went out- it was my choice and my son more important than "me time". pumping for me was hard enough for work let alone some "me time". besides, no one ever wanted to ahng with me anymore anyway

Answer 6

My 13 month old has only been left with my mom once, for a very short time, otherwise he is always with my husband or me.  We do seem to be the minority that way, and we do get the occasional comment, but we wouldn't change a thing! :)

Answer 7

My 20 year old niece was my 1st babysitter for my 5 1/2 month old. We were gone 1 hour and it was after he was asleep. No, I don't find it weird, I think you sound like a great mommy and good job! You had and will have again "time for yourself".

Answer 8

It's definitely your choice when to leave your daughter w/ a babysitter.  But make sure you know that it is okay to want some time for yourself.  Yes, you "had the baby & it's your responsibility to care for her" but there's nothing wrong w/ needing time for yourself.

Answer 9

No. My first was not babysat till she was one...and that was reluctantly! I am like you and don't feel happy leaving them...my second is 5 and a half months and hasn't been left either. I just think that whilst they are so young and vulnerable nobody is as good as me!

Answer 10

That is normal for breastfed babies so if you don't feel like you need a break then it's got nothing to do with your friend. Carry on enjoying your little one.

Answer 11

yea same here got a 3 year old and 3 month old both girls and I breastfeed my youngest and not only do I nfind it hard to work and breastfeed and be a full time mom but I dont trust people now days..good luck to you and conrats on your little girl!

mom of two that loves being with her two kids don't care if I have time to myself but when I do its when their both in bed .

Answer 12

This is tricky. If you are truly choosing to spend every minute of every day with her then it's okay. But to honestly answer your own question, call a friend or relative and ask that they watch her for the afternoon/evening/morning (whenever) and go somewhere. Don't forget to pump that breast milk first! Spend a minimum of three hours away from your baby (WITHOUT CALLING), and see how you feel. If you feel fine about it, you're okay. If you feel as though you've abandoned her, or let her down, etc.- there may be a problem.

It's normal to miss her like crazy, but you should still be able to function normally without her there.

Hope this helps!

Answer 13

Completely normal. Unless it's family, you never know what kind of person is watching your kids and you need to be careful. I didn't let my mother watch my son until he was over 7 months old. I couldn't handle being away from him. Even when she did watch him that first time, I cried on the date my hubby and I had because it was so hard to be away from him. It's normal. One day you will know when you and the hubby are ready for a little you time and whenever that is is for you to decide. Good luck!

Answer 14

"I made the choice to have a baby and that it is my responsibility to care for her."

I have the EXACT same sentiment. My husband was the one that was always trying to pawn or son on our parents and i would tell him the same thing.

I do not find it weird in the least and especially if you're breastfeeding.

When my son was really little I left him twice so DH and I could have a "date" and I only left when he was asleep cause I knew he would stay that way.

He's 20 months now and only gets "baby sat" when I'm in work. I've loosened up a bit and am more willing now to let other people watch him, but only because he is so grown up. He can tell them what he wants and needs and he isn't as "high maintenance" as an infant.

That was another reason why I didn't want to leave him, I didn't want to try to explain to someone else what his schedule and routine was and expect them to do it right.

When you're ready then you'll leave her with someone you trust. There's not rush!

Answer 15

im not surprised you sound like a wonderfull mommy!

Answer 16

my son is 3 1/2 yrs now and when he was smaller he stayed with me the whole time for the 1st yr except one day he stayed with my mom for a few hrs so i could go to a meeting i breast feed to and it is a whole lot easier to keep them with u until u stop breast feeding yes u need a little time by your self but work it between ur feeding schedule if u even want to go anywhere with out ur baby like to the grocery store and let the grandparents have some time with there grand baby they would enjoy it

Answer 17

My daughter is 10 months old and I'm the same way but for different reasons. I was abused by someone I trusted as a young child and I have a HUGE fear of this happening to my daughter so I know as long as she's in my care I can protect her from experiencing what happened to me. I have no intention of letting anyone watch her until years from now when she's not so vulnerable. Even then I think I'd have a hard time letting her out of my sight. I know I'm going to be accused of being far too overprotective but I'd rather deal with that then have her deal with the emotional torment I live with each and every day of my life.  

Answer 18

I don't find it surprising at all. I tried to avoid having anyone babysit as much as I can. In fact Sarah has been watched all day only 1 time, and that was when My Husband & I went to buy a new car, and that was the most horrible 6 hrs of my life, not knowing what she was doing, did she get her nap, did she feed her .etc....and we left her with my SIL who is a nanny, and I was still worried...lol. Other then those days, my mom watched her for about a total of 2 hrs spread out......I cant even think about not having her by my side at all times. And we all need a lil me time, but we are mommies now. My me time is now our time :D

Answer 19

Not surprising at all.  My daughter was never babysat until she was past her first birthday.  I was with her most of the time, and when I went out (I sang with a choir, so was away for about 2 hours once a week) her daddy took care of her.  

If you are happy with your choices, they aren't 'wrong' -- nobody HAS to be away from their children.

Answer 20

I commend you for your commitment to your daughter. She will grow up soon and you will have all kinds of mommy time. I was never able to breast feed but still felt like I wanted to be there for them.