Does anyone else think it's wrong?

Question

for someone to throw themself bridal shower?

Answer 1

Yes, that's not proper etiquette.

ETA:  kazacan has got it right.  The whole point of a shower is to shower someone else with gifts.  That's why it should be thrown by someone who's not the bride.  To throw yourself a shower would be like saying you want to shower yourself with gifts so you're going to have a party for the sole purpose of people coming to give you a gift, which is not right.  You're right in thinking that's odd, because it is.

Answer 2

no, maybe no one else will throw her one. wait...isn't the maid of honor supposed to do that?

Answer 3

Well as far as tradition and etiquette go, it's not the best idea for a bride to throw her own bridal shower.  Usually family and / or the bridal party do this for the bride.  If the bride gives a shower for herself it just screams "bring me gifts because I am selfish!"  So yes, I definitely think it's wrong!

Answer 4

Yes and its rude. I am in a wedding where she is dictating how she wants her shower. I am getting annoyed.

Answer 5

Its not like they're ever really surprised now anyways since everyone registers for them.  I think, to be in good taste, its still most acceptable to at least have the illusion that others are throwing it for you....but really, it probably doesn't matter!

Answer 6

YES. Heck,yes!!! A bridal shower is for people to shower someone they like with gifts to get them started out in a new home. Gads!! If you don't have any friends/relatives/coworkers who like you well enough to throw a shower for you, then I hope you're having a small wedding and not counting on many gifts there either. a shower isn't a part of the wedding planning. It is A BLESSING, A GIFT ...and it is FROM others TO you. To throw yourself a shower is so rude, you might as well send out invites that say "I WANT A BUNCH OF GIFTS SO PLEASE COME OVER AND BRING ME SOMETHING". Hey, while you're at it, why not ask them to ALSO send you an extra $30 each so you can buy them refreshments.

Answer 7

I think the whole idea of asking for gifts is odd, no matter who does the asking.

Answer 8

I don't think its wrong at all. It depends on the reasons.

In my case my mother and sister are doing the bridal shower for me and I am just as involved in the process together with them.

I say do whatever you want. If there is someone that can help you then better! But if no one offers to do it for you, then just do it yourself. But at least give someone the opportunity to.

Answer 9

I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Remember that old saying "If you want something done right, do it yourself" Here are some great ideas for the bachelorette party - http://www.sextoysex.com/s*x/start/cat.h...

Answer 10

So, do you think that since I don't want a bridal party that I shouldn't get a shower? I don't want to deal with the drama, stress, responsibility, and cost of a bridal party, and my friends certainly don't have the time between work, husband, kids, household responsibilities to deal with a "list of duties," nor can they afford to be in a wedding, or organize and pay for a bachelorette party or bridal shower. I'm doing them a huge favor. So since I have spared them the BS, I don't deserve a shower? What if I wanted one? What if I organized it myself? That's wrong? Hmmm. So, I must burden my already overworked and stretched thin friends to throw me a shower so I have things "right" and "proper"? ah, no, I think that's wrong! In today's day, I think almost anything goes. People need to stop reading their grandmother's etiquette books and step on into 2008!

Answer 11

You know what...NO ITS NOT WRONG AT AL!!!!! Its your special day and it belongs to you and your own ideas and planning. Forget formality!!!! Do what you want. But if you had a real true maid of honor she would have done it for you! I SAY THROW YOUR OWN SHOWER IF NOBODY ELSE WILL! This is a once in a lifetime affair! ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!

oops , i just read the added details. My bad! No she may be turning into a bridezilla or she may just be very particular with what sh wants. And the MAID OF HONOR COMMENT was a bit for myself. Im getting married in a few weeks and my maid of honor hasnt done any of that stuff for me. I just chose to cut the cost of a shower ie:refreshments,decor,etc...It can be costly. Added to wedding costs (which I am paying for) it was too much for me. And well...registering for wedding gifts is in the same category as asking for gifts you want isnt it?

Answer 12

Every situation is different.

Some people are not having Bridal Parties because of money issues. If this is the case throwing a simple shower isn't that bad of an idea, but it would be better is a family member or friend threw it.

Answer 13

i do

Answer 14

I agree with you.  When a bride hosts a bridal shower for herself, that is an etiquette no-no.  A faux pas.

Answer 15

Yes. If no one else volunteers, discreetly ask a close friend to "host" it, and tell her you'll do all the work in her name.

Answer 16

Yeah, it isn't proper ettiquette. It makes the bride seem like she is asking for gifts and greedy.

Answer 17

Nope, I did. It worked out great, and no one really cared. I did it because I only had 5 months to plan my wedding, and my bridesmaids were really busy. I made my own invitations, made all the plans, but had the MOH and my mom decorate the party for me. It was fun!

Answer 18

Maybe she just likes to plan? Tell her the bridal party wants to throw it, but if she has suggestions, to let you know so she still feels like she is a part of it. It may not be a greed thing.. because obviously someone will throw her one. She might just like to plan! My mom threw mine, which I know is not considered proper ettiquette, but my mom looooves to cook and entertain and have guests and it was really a great party.

Answer 19

Yes, this is wrong.  It is against any kind of etiquette rules and common sense.

IF, for some reason, this was a very small wedding, then usually a family member will do it (even the mother of the bride in this case would be OK).

But, you have stated that this bride does indeed have bridesmaids/maid of honor willing to do it.  So I find it not only wrong but somewhat very strange that the bride would do this.  But...oh well.....I guess there is nothing new when it comes to weddings!

Answer 20

Sorta. But I guess it depends on the situation. What if their close friends can't afford it? Or they don't have female family. And some people say family shouldn't throw it either. It is sort of a lot of money to ask your friend to spend on you. Does it really bother you who is throwing it? Its a little unheard of, but I think with money being such an issue in the world lately its going to become more common.

Answer 21

No, if no one else will do it for them. Cause if they want one, and no one else is going to do it, they are kind of on their own... so no.

Answer 22

that would be in poor taste.. it is tacky to throw yourself a party and expect people to bring you gifts.. is the bride just a control freak? I have dealt with some controlling brides in my life and when they try to take over the shower, i tell them that the shower is a gift from the bridal party and if you cant trust the closest people to you to do something nice for you, then you should have never asked them to be a part of your day...

Answer 23

You only need to do that if your wedding is small and you don't have a maid or matron of honor. But. you should really have a friend or family member do that for you.

Answer 24

It isn't wrong, its sad.

Answer 25

Lol.. It's against proper etiquette... And a little odd, when there are people willing to throw it for her.

Answer 26

Uhh well No i guess

Im not really sure

Answer 27

Wierd but I guess not.

Answer 28

She shouldn't throw her own shower...I've never heard of it; but I guess it's a first time for everything. I'm sure the guest would look at her a lil strange.,

Answer 29

Your Maid of Honor is suppost to. Or one of the other girls or guys.  Did you know it's no big deal to have a Man of Honor at your side?