Does anyone have advice in how best to deal with a 5 year olds sudden fear of going to sleep on their own?

Question

My 5 year old (who has always slept very well on her own) has recently been scared by ghost stories being told by children at school. She was really scared of being on her own, particularly at bedtime but also during the day. For 4 nights I stayed with her until she fell asleep. Her class teacher has now spoken to all the children and reassured them that these are stories and not true but my daughter is now refusing to stay in her bed unless we stay in the room with her. I have spent 2 nights sitting outside her room and putting her back into bed with a battle of wills lasting 4+hours. I can't continue to do this as she has to get up for school in the morning and I have to get up for work (and we are exhausted), nor do I believe the solution is to sit with her every night until she falls asleep as I know (from experience with an older daughter) how quickly sleep patterns can change/develop. We have tried everything; reassurance, offer of rewards, leaving a lamp on with no progress

Answer 1

Try playing a CD softly, the silence really bugs my kids. I bought an instrumental lullaby CD at Wal-Mart from Fisher-Price that is very pretty and soothing, it is in the baby section not the music section. And we put it on repeat all it seems to help. Now they just have it on for one time and they fall asleep but at first I would set it to repeat over and over (the whole CD).

Answer 2

I went through a period of this with both my daughters. You are gonna laugh at what we did to get them brave again. I would tell them I have their little friend (MIckey Mouse) for one and (Minnie Mouse) for the other, these were their favorites. I would pretend they were in my hand and I would very softly talk to each one and ask them if they could sleep with each daughter and take care of them through the night. Of course they could not see a thing, but they would oh so carefully hold out their hands and I gave them each one, and off they would go upstairs, whispering softly to their little friends. No problem, they got in bed and I would make a big thing about fixing a safe area on the bed for the characters to sleep at, and so on. I know this sounds so weird, and my  kids are and were very bright, but their imaginations went right along with it and we had peaceful nights again. It's worth a try, you just have to keep serious and pretend these little characters are really there! LOL! I miss those days, best of luck!

Answer 3

If you are a Christian, pray with her, and show her the Veggie Tales movie "God is Bigger than the Boogyman"

Let her know that God is taking care of her and that she will be alright.

Also try security blanket/stuffed animals.

One more thing, when my brother and I were young we were afraid of ghosts. My dad always told us to give the ghost a spanking and that he wouldn't bother us.

Try playing soft (classical)  music when she goes to bed, this will soothe her, distract her, and keep her from focussing on house noises like creaking stairs and pipes in the walls.

Answer 4

Get a can of air freshener, spray it around her room and tell it's Go Away Ghost spray, or Sweet Dreams spray.  I did this for my daugter when she was afraid of having bad dreams at night.

Best wishes to you... and a good night's sleep.

Answer 5

I think you should talk to the teacher and tell her to stop telling the kids stories like this. Talk to your daughter and ask her what part scares her. Then prove to her that it can't be true. I hope this helped.

-Tara

Answer 6

I did a similar thing to Capricornia and it worked very well. I said I would buy some magic powder that scared ghosts away (jelly crystals) and put in in a bowl near the bed. I said if you think there are any ghosts you can throw the powder at them and that will send them away.

I never heard any more about it.

Answer 7

when i was little i had the same problem with not being able to sleep well and not being able to go to sleep fast...it really helped having a night light sitting on my table next to me and havin the fan on so I could'nt hear little noises in the night...u might also want to keep the door open so she can know your near

Answer 8

You are only enabling this behavior in your daughter.  She is never going to get past it as long as you continue to do so.  Okay so she throws a fit for 4+ hours that is something you are just going to have to deal with.  Once she figures out that you're not going to give in she will stop.  Right now she is in control and unless you end it now it will get worse.  The fact is that you are all going to miss some sleep you're not going to get away from it.  I've heard of parents setting up a "monster alarm" in their kids bedrooms, they are those little beepers you can put on windows and doors.  I know some parents mix part water and air freshener or cologne into a spray bottle and it becomes "monster repellent"...You might also get her some lavender spray to spray her sheets and pillow with, lavender has a relaxing/calming effect and can help a child to sleep.

Answer 9

she's 5, be craetive mom. the movie monsters inc. was a great relief to the "boogy man" in the closet. let her watch it. give her a special trnket that gives her "powers" to beat up the monsters or ghosts.

Answer 10

At about the same age, and shortly after my divorce, my daughter went through something similar.  I started by having the Easter bunny bring her a little stuffed rabbit named Sweet Dreams.....it was written on the front of the bunny.  I told her that it would help her have nice dreams instead.  Also, I went to the Dollar Store and bought about two weeks worth of $1 toys.  I put them in a bucket downstairs, and she was allowed to get a toy each morning that woke up in her bed.  I only had to do this for a couple of weeks.  Both worked like a charm.  Every once in a blue moon she gets up in the middle of the night and gets in bed with me, but those are so few and far between, I don't kick up any dust over it.

Answer 11

Perhaps make her start in her bed but allow her to come into your room if she gets really scared. But don't make that part easy for her. Let her lie at the foot of your bed on the ground, and make it a bit uncomfartable so she doesn't see it as a long term solution. Perhaps make her bring in her own pillow ans blanket and she might figure it is not worth it after a while.

And don't react but just let her do it if she wants to. Start to downplay it (and yes, I do understand it is still abig problem in the eyes of your daughter). But just try acting as if you don't mind now and see what she does?

Thia might just be a time thing. I wish you well with your challenge.