Does anyone know or recommend any books for social anxiety that has worked for them or someone else?

Question

Does anyone know or recommend any books for social anxiety that has worked for them or someone else?

Answer 1

The Hidden Face Of Shyness: (try www.amazon.com)

Authors: Franklin Schneier & Lawrence Welkowitz

This book provides a diverse range of information about social anxiety, the various fears social anxiety sufferers may have, the causes of social anxiety & treatment options.

View the information and weblinks for social anxiety/shyness, and self confidence, in sections 9, and 38, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris  Here is an exercise that can help you. It is called "Act as If." When you are in a social situation, act as if you are outgoing. Talk more, smile at everyone, ask questions, speak in a normal or excited tone, not a meek tone. Watch some of your outgoing peers, and imitate the style of their social behavior.

Research shows that when you "act as if" continually, your image of yourself begins to conform to your new behavior. In this case, you will gain self-esteem and self-confidence, and begin to see yourself as socially normal, not shy. You will become more socially successful, and this will motivate you to continue your new social behavior until it becomes a habit.

Try this for a month, in every situation you can. I am confident that you will become much more comfortable and outgoing. One form of therapy is to go somewhere that nobody knows you, and deliberately make an utter fool of yourself: put on a paper hat, and scream out: "I'm queen/king of America!", or something else ridiculous, then get back in the taxi, (warn the driver of your intentions, first) or car, and leave.      

      People will point, and say: "Look at that idiot". But, you're probably not up to the stage where you can do that, yet (I can, and I used to be shy). It will teach you that, although it isn't actually pleasant, you will survive; be stronger for the experience, and the next time (should you need to repeat this type of therapy) will be considerably easier. Remember: "A fear avoided is a fear strengthened; a fear faced is a fear reduced." Regard it as your final test: once you have accomplished it, the barrier will be broken; just don't go too far, the other way! Learn to laugh at yourself, and give a big, cheesy grin when others see you do something foolish, as we all do, occasionally. It is endearing, if you don't do it too often. Use positive affirmations: for example: "I am very likable and other people feel comfortable around me".      

      Write down all of your self limiting beliefs; then write down the positive counter of them, (exact opposite) and repeat them and imprint them into your mind.

Most importantly: Force yourself to approach somebody and initiate some sort of communication. Start out small by asking the time and directions and gradually go bigger.

Although there are anti-anxiety medications (anxiolytics) available, these come with risks, and the possibility of side effects, habituation, even addiction, and withdrawal problems, and are unsuitable for young people.

Answer 2

Hi Hick...I have social anxiety disorder.  The book I use for all kinds of anxiety disorders is called The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook, by Dr. Edmund Bourne.  I would highly recommend it to you as the same techniques in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy are applied to social anxiety disorder.

This website contains a wealth of information as well and many links for additional information.

http://socialanxietydisorder.about.com/