Does he drink too much?

Question

I know someone who in my opinion drinks a lot. He will buy one of those 15 can packs on a Friday night, and usually drink about 8-10 on that same night. He then will finish the pack by the next afternoon. Sometimes he goes out and gets another, or at least a 6 pack, and drinks that in a short span of time too. He gets drunk and when he is drunk his personality changes a lot, he's short fused, testy, and snappy, and gets a very cocky "I don't care about anyone or anything" attitude.

When I try to bring this up to talk to him about it, he gets very angry, and the conversation never gets far, he just says "I'm not talking about this" and bam all communication stops. He says I'm trying to change him, but I just want him to be healthy and yeah honestly I don't like being around someone who's drunk or getting drunk every single weekend.

This happens pretty much every week. Yes, he did grow up around a lot of alcohol, his parents do the same thing. He promises me he will cut back and he keeps the promise for a few weeks, then everything goes back to normal after that. I don't know if I'm being unreasonable??? And it's not like he's out with the guys or anything or with people, it's just himself and I in the house.

Answer 1

One beer is more than I have had in my entire life, and it has nothing to do with religion. On two levels, the answer is yes. One is too many, and even if he will not admit it, he is an alcoholic. I went through one relationship with an alcoholic. Never again. One drink and I am history. I find that people who drink are generally much less mature than those who do not, and I have hobnobbed with the best.

Answer 2

Medical experts suggest no more than 1 drink per 24 hours for women and 2 for men, so yeah, he drinks too much.

Here's the thing though, you can't change other people's behavior. You can only change your behavior and how you react to others. I suggest you begin going to Al-Anon a group of people who are affected by people who have alcohol problems.

Answer 3

you need to give him a good alternative to drinking, like s*x, start putting out more...but only if he drinks less

Answer 4

"Too much" is a relative measurement. In this case, I think you have to measure it like this: does his drinking negatively impact his life? If so, he probably drinks too much. But until HE accepts this, there is not a lot you can do about it. If this is your boyfriend or husband, you may need to do a little "tough love" to get him to stop. He needs to know that alcohol will impact his life, including his relationships. But a better place to start is here:

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

Good luck!