Does he have regrets about us?

Question

My fiance and I recently moved in together. We previously had a long distance relationship where we only saw each other on weekends. Since he was more established in his life (owns a house, loves his job) I was the one to move. I quit my job and moved. Since I moved in, he hasn't talked to me as much. He even drops rude comments now about my weight, me being worthless, etc. I have been pretty depressed since I moved in because of this and other things, for example; I haven't found a job yet. I started looking seriously when we got engaged in March. I hate not working especially since I now live in a small town and there is nothing to do and I don't know anyone except his family. This is a major change for both of us, but he really isn't being sensitive to the fact that I have had to sacrifice a lot more than he has to make this happen. Is he regretting everything? Should I just move back to where I came from and start over?

Answer 1

Honey, if he is acting like this now its not gonna get any better once you get married, and if i were you i would not stand for it. Life is to short to let anyone talk to you that way and put you down and make you feel like you are not Worthy of his time. I think you should pick up and go back home, find you a job and start over because its only gonna get worse, and another thing, once you have kids you don't want them to watch and hear things like that, i watched my mom and dad do things to each other that have really put a toll on me and its not easy to get over. good luck in what you decide.

Answer 2

I have serious concerns about how he is treating you already and you are not even married yet.  You two need to sit down and have a BIG talk about where your relationship really is heading.

You may want to consider going back and seeing where your relationship takes you.  If its not meant to be, this will be the end of the road and you'll meet someone who will truly love you.

Answer 3

Hello,

I would suggest  talking. If he is not open to talking, then you let him know how you are feeling about the situation..but ultimately, even if he is stressed and not handling/coping to the situation, you need to look after you and if you are not happy and things aren't looking positive and no intelligent caring discussion is on the forefront...then look after you is all you can do. Best of luck. I know it's hard.

Answer 4

I think the bigger problem is the face that he's cruel to you about your weight and calls you worthless.  Move wherever you want to, just get away from him.

Answer 5

More importantly, are YOU regretting things? He sounds like he's not very kind, or appreciative of what you've done for your relationship. It seems you two need to have a sit down and talk it all out. Best wishes. He doesn't sound like the kind of partner I'd willingly sign up for a lifetime with...

Answer 6

Comments about your weight and your "being worthless" are not rude. The go FAR beyond rude; they are EMOTIONAL ABUSE.

Run like h**l.

It might be super hard to start over, but will be harder still to keep your sanity and self-esteem living with someone pounding away at you like that.

I'm in pretty much the same situation WITHOUT the emotional abuse. It's hard enough under the best of circumstances. You deserve much better.

Answer 7

First - I'm glad that you are recognizing that the comments he is making is not right.

NO ONE should EVER say anything that brings you down. Someone who loves you should never say anything but compliments to you. You have to ask yourself - "Do I want to be treated like this for the REST of my life?" If no, you need to break it off.

I know this sounds scary and would be easier to just stay, but you need to think about yourself and what is best for you. If he is starting this kind of behavior before you are married - it's only going to get worse. Get out before you are married, because it's much harder to sever ties when you're married!

Answer 8

commenting you is not a good thing.I dont see this relationship happening,babe.Sorry.You deserve better.

Answer 9

Is HE regretting everything?...are you kidding? The guy is a disaster waiting to happen. The red flags are dropping all over the place and you haven't seen them yet??

A decent guy does not make rude comments about his fiancee's weight and tell her she's worthless..especially just because she has not found a job yet.

Unload this loser and move on...he's bad news.