Does it ever scare you when strangers are overly interested in your child?

Question

When I had my daughter (she's now 3 1/2yo) from the day she left the hospital people were constantly surrounding her. Of course, I was a proud Mommy and LOVED all the compliments. But it got to the point where I would go to the grocery store, and people from isles down would chase me down before I left just to see her. Everyone thought I was carrying around this little doll because she was so tiny. 5lbs 3oz, 18inches & a head full of black hair with olive color skin. People were always leaning over her, and breathing on her, and when I had my back turned in a store, I would turn around, and they would even be peaking under the blanket on their own!!! Everyone kept telling me, "Don't worry, as she gets older, people won't be as interested". Instead, now that she is older, people actually come up and hand her dollar bills! They tell me "she is so beautiful, go buy her something". I never let my daughter touch them, there are some crazies out there, so you never know. I always take them, and put them away in her baby album. But the older she gets, the friendlier she is, the more strangers talk to her, it's starting to worry me. I don't want to teach my daughter to be rude, but I do want her to know to be leary of strangers. How can I teach her this without her becoming rude? I have tried a few times to talk to her about it, and then she goes out and is downright mean if somebody tells her anything. Any ideas?

Answer 1

I live in a country other than U.S., here it is completely natural for total strangers to give food, candy,chewinggum and  to even hug,pat  and kiss children. I remember some American friends being completely overwhelmed.

Tell her most people are good and friendly but some are very bad. Tell her that there are only a few bad people, one person in the whoooole crowd in the street for example, but that if that person comes, he can kidnap her, take her away, and she will never see you again. Tell her to smile and be polite but never to walk and go with strangers, never to eat anything they give, never to talk too much.. Tell her that we don't know who that person is, so we should be friendly but we must never go with them in case he is the bad guy.

THat's what I did  with my sons.

Answer 2

It is scary not knowing who is talking to your child. My son is soooo overly social and a major flirt. So we constantly have people coming up to us and talking to him. I made sure that no one could get near him when he was first born. But now I just keep an eye on him  and let him flirt away. My parents used to get money to buy things for me and my siblings. Usually people are jsut being genuinely nice. Talk to her at home and let her know about going anywhere with strangers. But if you are with her it shouldn't be a problem

Answer 3

yes thats normal i just tell my daughter to smile say thanks and keep walkin.

i DO NOT take the money ever especialy when its guys...kinda creepy

Answer 4

I have a 13 month old who has always been a magnet for attention.  She is very beautiful with large brown eyes.  I know every Mother thinks their child is beautiful but I have had so many people tell me that she is the most beautiful baby they have ever seen, even better looking than their own.  Add to that the fact that she is super friendly.  She will just stare at people until they look at her and then lower her lashes and look up and smile.  She flirts with everybody she sees.  Because of this I am very nervous going out in public with her and I usually don't go anywhere without my husband.  I don't even go to the grocery store without my husband.  I hope you get some good answers to your question because I am interested to see how I can handle this when my daughter is older and will begin talking to these strangers.  

Answer 5

Oh yes, I have the same problem with my three - year - old son.  He's had an entourage since I brought him home from the hospital.  The other day, an Asian woman who apparently didn't speak much English (we live just a few blocks out of Chinatown) came up to him in the park.  She kept trying to give him pennies, and then tried to put a piece of candy in his mouth.  Perhaps she meant well, but I freaked out and told her to get away from my son.  After all, you just can't be too safe.  

I've had people try to touch him, pick him up, give him a hug or kiss on the cheek, the works!  I started telling him at a young age never to talk to a stranger unless Mommy said it was OK.  It may sound rude so some people, but I'd rather sound rude than lose my child to some nut case.  

Answer 6

Yes it does bother me when strangers are overly interested! My radar immediately goes up and I move quickly away. As I told my husband you don't have to stand and talk to a stranger just because they keep going on and on.

-Do not let your daughter accept money from strangers. Return it to them and tell them you are trying to teach her not to accept money from strangers.

- Do not ask them questions or comment on their statements other than to say thank you and then keep walking. Teach your daughter the same thing.

  Be careful, my radar has gone up at least four times when I have been around a person who was too friendly and I kept my distance and my children from being around them. And each time I was right, and they were later arrested as pedophiles or child endangerment.

Watch the TV show with John Walsh and keep your child safe! It is more important to keep your child safe than be polite and say the right thing to strangers. Watch how celebrities deal with strangers.

Better that your child is rude to strangers then take any chances that she will be abducted.