Does my fiance really love me?

Question

I've been engaged since last december, we've been a couple for more than 6 years now, and at the beginning he was ALWAYS showing me in every possible way how much he loved me and cared for me, but i think that i was a little bit indifferent at first and we had a lot of problems since the beggining of our relationship, but got over them, however he changed a lot, he changed almost everything, he doesn't do the same things he did for me at frist, he's not that expressive, he turned to be something like me back then, cold and indifferent, i mean, he still tells me that he loves me, and care for me and everything, sometimes he is really sweet, but not that much like in the beginning. And everytime i tell him about this he says that he do love me a lot, that i'm the most important thing in his life, but because of all the struggles and problems we had in the beginning of the rs he stopped feeling like showing it that much to me, and right now the roles are inverted, he is like me when we first started and i am like him when we started the rs, and i get really really sad because he doesn't do things for me that i would do for him, and that he used to do. So he decided to take the relationship to the next level, and sometimes i can feel that he really wants to spend his life with me, but some other times he just doesn't show that much of interest. I don;t know what to think!!

Answer 1

It's normal for people to be much more romantic during the first year or two of the relationship when everything is still so new.  What you're seeing right now is probably a better representation of what being married to him is going to be like.  You just have to ask yourself whether or not this is what you want for the rest of your life.

Answer 2

i think this little hobbit is turning into a gollum type of thing

with two sides to him one caring an loving and the other all bitter and angry and thats not good for u and your future

u know what u should do...

run away with me lets forget everything and run away together

ill make u the happiest woman on the planet if you'll just give me a chance

drop that giant headed short hairy feet boyfriend of yours and come with me

i have cookies =)

luv ya  

Answer 3

I think sometimes guys get comfortable in a relationship, especially one as long as you guys have been together! In the beginning they were tring to impress you and win you over. now that he has you maybe he doesn't feel like he needs to do that stuff anymore. I would casually mention to him how much you miss certain things (specifcally) or that you would love to do stuff like that again. If he doens't take the hint I'd flat out tell him you are feeling neglected and need a little more from him. There's nothing wrong with being honest about how you are feeling. No matter what DON'T marry him until you guys have these things worked out. Did he propose to you to try and fix things and prove his love for you? If so then that is a huge red flag! Sit down and talk to him and find out where he is. If you need to ask that question after 6 years I'd be doing some more thinking about whether you and he should be together.

Answer 4

You write:  Does my fiance really love me?

If you have doubts after six years together, then you need to end this relationship.  Yes, end the relationship.  

You should not be engaged to this man if you have any doubts.  

After six years, you know deep in your heart whether or not he truly loves you.  Listen to your heart.

Answer 5

i'm starring this question :/ i have the same problem except he says he wants to get married but then changes his mind like every other week... but the same thing happened where the roles kind of changed and instead of him, i'm trying to i guess make him know how much i care for him and dont get much back any more. good luck with your relationship, just know ur not the only one with the same problem. :) i hope all goes well for you guys :)

Answer 6

Maybe he's fighting with his inner-demons and doesn't want to get you involved.

Answer 7

of course he loves you!

Answer 8

I can relate to what you are saying in the beginning of my rs with my husband he was  the affectionate one and after 6 years of marriage I took over the role of the affectionate on but i can tell you this he does love you. He is just letting you show you feeling for him and before you know it he will come to his normal self.

Answer 9

please seek pre-marital counseling.  I bet you are young and since you have been together for 6 years, you have both probably changed a lot. Talk to a counselor or pastor to make sure that this marriage is what you BOTH want.

Answer 10

Anytime you are getting married counseling is warranted.  If you are getting married at a church, the Pastor will do the counseling.  You should both tell the Pastor about your concerns.  His behavior could be for a lot of reasons, but I don't think we can figure it out here on the internet.

Answer 11

engaged since december and a couple for 6 years and yet you cant tell if he love you or not..... bring a paper and a pen and write down 10 times , he doesnt love me , he love me,, ,,, by number 10 you will know if he love u or not

Answer 12

Yes, he really loves you. Although, you should try to bring the spark back. And, really check to see if you're doing everything the way you used to also. Sometimes, we notice them changing, but don't notice that we did too. If you haven't, then talk to him. Sometimes "dating" helps more than you know. Good luck!!

Answer 13

marrying could bring you closer i guess but you need to think yourself some people on the internet cant help you find out if you should spend your life with him.