Don't know which path to take?

Question

I'm 15 years old and I'm having a hard time deciding if I want to continue to follow God and walk with my youth group. I was in that church for about 6 years but I still feel intimidated by the youth group and I want to fit in so bad and socialize w/ them but I just can't. I'm having trouble feeling God's love and praying out to Him; afraid of what my youth group might think cause it seems as if they judge people sometimes. But I know all youth groups aren't perfect. I just don't know what to do and I was in the youth group with my older sister for 3 years and she left for college and now I feel so scared and alone

Answer 1

If you don't like or fit in to the youth group then find another one. Maybe go with a friend to their group.  Your sister was someone you could relate to and be with while she was there.  Now you need to find a place where you can feel good about and make some friends of your own.  There is always going to be change that we have to get used to. I am older and I can say I still don't like change. But I just pray about where I go to church and it seems like I get drawn to where I'm supposed to be.  

Answer 2

No one can tell you what to do.  However, I know of several Bible-based publications that can help you to figure it out, & many are o-line:

Video: "How Can I Make Real Friends?"  http://watchtower.org/e/vcfe/article_01....

"How to Make Real Friends" :

- We All Need Friends

- Satisfying Our Hunger for Friendship

- Good Friends--Bad Friends http://watchtower.org/e/20041208/article...

"Coping With Loneliness..."  http://watchtower.org/e/20040608/article...

"Why Care About Spiritual Things?" :

- Spirituality and Your Well-Being---A Positive Link!       http://watchtower.org/e/20040201/article...

A few of the chapters from the Book:

"QUESTIONS Young People Ask--ANSWERS That Work" :

Section #1. The Home Front: Dealing With Family Members

Section #2 You and Your Peers

- ch 8 How Can I Make Real Friends?

- ch 9 How Can I Cope With Peer Pressure?

Section #3 A Look at How You Look

Section #4 Why Do I Feel This Way?

- ch 12 Why Don't I Like Myself?

- ch 13 Why Do I Get So Depressed?

- ch 14 How Can I Make My Loneliness Go Away?

- ch 15 Why Am I So Shy?

- ch 16 Is It Normal to Grieve the Way I Do?

Section #5 School and Work

Section #6 s*x and Morals

Section #7 Dating, Love, and the Opposite s*x

Section #8 The Trap of Drugs and Alcohol

Section #9 Leisure Time

Section #10 Your Future

- ch 38 What Does the Future Hold for Me?

- ch 39 How Can I Get Close to God?

http://watchtower.org/e/publications/ind...

This^ book (& its sequel) are based on a series of articles,

several samples of which are indexed & on-line for you to read, at:  http://watchtower.org/e/archives/index.h...

your trouble of not feeling close to God is an important issue that needs attention.  Notice the recommendation to:

"Draw close to God, and he will draw close to you." --James 4:8

Notice the commendations given to early Christians:

"The Be·roe′ans were noble-minded, for they received the word with the greatest eagerness of mind, *carefully examining the Scriptures daily* as to whether these things were so."  Acts 17:10,11  

"Indeed... we also thank God incessantly, because when *you received God’s word... *you accepted it*... just as it truthfully is, *as the word of God*...".  1 Thessalonians 2:13

Do you regularly study God's Word?  And, strive to apply its principles in your day-to-day life?  I wonder how many in your Youth Group do this?  Are you interested in having a personal Bible study?  Notice the counsel:

"...Jehovah is near...

To all those who call upon him *in trueness*." --Psalm 145:18  

“*Incline your ear and hear the words of the wise* ones,

that you may *apply your very heart* to my knowledge.” --Proverbs 22:17

Can anyone effectively do this without a regular, in-depth Bible study?

If you are interested in learning more, I suggest reading:

"Faith and Reason---Are They Compatible?" :

- Should Faith Be Based on Reason?

> Search for God With Your Heart and Mind

- Imitate the Great Teacher    

http://watchtower.org/e/20020401/article...

"Is There A Sound Basis for Your Beliefs?"

- Your Right to Believe...

http://watchtower.org/e/20010801/article...

"Does Praying Do Any Good?"  

http://watchtower.org/e/20001115/article...

(see also: "How Should We Pray?"

"Understanding the Bible--A Pleasure Open to You

- A Pleasure Open to All!"

http://watchtower.org/e/20060401a/articl...

"Make sure of all things; hold fast to what is fine." --1Th 5:21

"...True worshipers will worship the Father with spirit and truth...  

God is a Spirit, and those worshiping him *must* worship with spirit and truth." --John 4:23,24

(I began a serious, thorough study of the Bible in my teens.  

That's where I found the only *satisfying* answers to my questions.) (;

Answer 3

You will have to find your own truth. Eventually everyone finds what is right for them.

Answer 4

yep I was in the same boat as you- I made the decision that it really wasn't for me. However, you have to make your own decision. Just remember to be yourself and choose the path that you think is right. If you are questioning their beliefs, I would read up on both sides before I made my decision.  

Answer 5

You don't have to do something if you don't agree with it.  If your youth group is stuck up like you say it is I would try to find a different one or skip out on it altogether.

Answer 6

Take the path you believe in. Church is one of God's home, and i'm sure he wants you to feel comfortable in it.

Answer 7

I am not of the same path as you, but I was raised Presbyterian and I never felt completely at ease in my youth group. However, I think that this is a good juncture for you to truly evaluate what your priorities are. If you truly value your faith and your religion more than you do the opinions of other's OF said faith than you should let go and worship in whatever way He has led you to do.

Answer 8

Follow God. Just because your growing older doesn't mean you have to leave Jesus behind.

Answer 9

Continue to walk with God, but I would suggest finding a new youth group to hang out with. If you don't feel comfortable with them, then you probably are not in the right place.

Answer 10

The best thing to do is to be comfortable with who you are, and to realize that you are fine even if others judge or don't like you.  This is a tough thing to realize when your are a teenager, but you will get through it.  I would also suggest that you try other groups in your school and community and see what ones you fit into.  Don't worry about what other kids think as they are just as clueless as you are, if not more.

As for believing in a god or not, take your time and objectively learn all that you can about all sides of the question.  If you do this you will eventually come to the right answer, and if not, it will not make a difference in the long run.

Answer 11

There are two completely seperate issues here that need to be seperated.

Firstly is your walk with God. Secondly is your inability to feel comfortable within your youth group.

Your walk with God is not reliant on being in a youth group, it is a relationship between yourself and Him alone. Think of it in terms of your sister and yourself and the relationship each of you have with your Mum and Dad. I'm sure you have a much different relationship with your parents than your sister and that is the same with God.

For example 3 of our 4 children live with us (I have a step son who lives with his mum) My eldest and I argue alot but we also have a jokie side to our relationship and he talks non stop. My next son is huggy, kissy and cuddly, he is my Mumma's Boy and doesn't care who knows it and will not let anyone speak against his Mum not even Dad. Then there is our youngest, he is less talkative than the others, hates kisses and hugs apart from bedtime, at which time you get a big old bear hug but NO kisses, his way is to sit and watch a movie or play a game with me. I have a VERY different relationship with each of my boys but the love is still the same, don't have favorites at all but individual relationships with individual traits.

God is like that with all of us, He knows you feel awkward praying aloud with the group just like my little man hates my kisses (LOL) but just like I accept that is the nature of my little man He accepts that is yor nature and even more so He created that nature in you. He knows what is in your heart.

Even if you leave a youth group or a church it doesn't mean you are leaving God or have to leave Him, you can have God in your life without a group but a group does help you focus on Him.

As for Youth Group some people just don't fit with the group mold and that is fine too. Personally I'm an introvert and am totally drained by group activities,maybe you are like that or maybe you just don't feel connected.

There are many groups around, can you try another? You might also feel that way because you lack confidence without your sister and others feel your lack of self confidence but only you can answer that.

Don't feel you need to cut off God because you cut off Youth Group...... That is like cutting off your nose because you have a pimple than needs to be popped on your nose if you get where I'm coming from.

I know it's a little long, but I hope it helps and you find your way. :-)