Doubly stuffed and emotionally screwed - needing help, someone???? Urgent response preferable.?

Question

I finally decided to pick up the phone when my ex phoned me (I'd turned them back on to call police and try to get hold of sis), and he basically wants back. The thing is, I know after everything I shouldn't take him back but I love him more than words can describe - he's my first and only love... is there any chance we could reconcile?

But that's not the only problem. My sis turned up and basically said that either I get back with the ex or she'll basically not ever talk to me again. We've always been really close but the past 20 (?) hours is making me rethink our siblingship. I mean, I know if it were the other way round I'd be there for her, but for some reason she seems to be going on my ex's side. I don't want to loose her, she's been my best friend since... well, we were born.

I just don't know what to do. I have no one in my life I can talk to about this, although I've tried speaking to a few of my flatmates who already knew about my ex and I, they just don't seem to care or they treat it like a joke, which I don't get, as my ex and I have never really quarrelled before (well, we have, but only about coming out, which now I guess isn't a problem.)

Any advice, anyone? Honesty is always accepted and gratefully. People must be sick of me but I dont know who to turn to, I'm temped to either just end it or just disappear, where no one can find me.

Answer 1

I've felt like this before, alone no one is there to understand you, not even your family who you thought would be by you through anything, believe me no love is unconditional. I've been in a really rocky relationship for years now I've put up with abuse,neglect, manipulation and to much to put into words. If you are willing to put up with a lot of h**l, then stay. I have wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out plenty of times, and just say s***w everyone, because no one really truly cares for me, but sometimes it's just easier to suffer a little, If you truly love him you guys will stay together through thick and thin, Love is pain sometimes, you know? I can say that me and my man have a much deeper and loving relationship now. we can talk about anything, most the time problem free, as for your sis you should sit her down and have a serious talk with her about how deeply it hurts to be abandoned at your time of need ( and left for the enemy, at the time) when you needed her the most, let her know blood is thicker than water, other people will come and go but family is forever, like it or not

Answer 2

Can you guys communicate well enough to be able to work things out. How about couple's therapy? I mean not everyone likes to air their personal problems in front of someone else, but sometimes when communication is the problem you need a mediator to help work things

I dont know what is going on, why you split up to begin with, but i think  bottom line is: it's going to depend on if what he did you could ever forgive him for.  

Answer 3

noooooooooooooo....be strong hun....only u really no ur true feelings and if things in the past have happend then its ur choice whether u get back wit him.....i honestly think ur sister is wrong for makin such a choice for you. no way should she pressure u into such a thing. she should stick by u and respect ur choice...anyway why is she so involved and taking his side against urs?! i have been in a similar situation where i was so in love with my ex and was in two minds in taking him back but things happen and u need to think about why u split and if u can really go back ther?!

good luck sweetie and follow ur instincts not always ur heart x

Answer 4

follow your heart regardless of everyone else says or thinks only u can know what is right ! Also set your boundaries of what u will tolerate and won't in a relationship ! all u can do is try . if u want to give him another chance go for it. I have been making up and breaking up with my man for 15 years.

Answer 5

Hey, dont go back to your ex. Rule is, once an ex, alway an ex. Don't worry bout sis, blood is thicker than water, she'll come back.