Drinking problem and trying not to go out?

Question

I have a drinking problem and I can't go out without drinking multiple drinks...as in a minimun of five or more drinks...(i'm 23 yr. old female) I am humilitaed to even admit such a thing but it's something I am trying very hard to work on. I just graduated college and looking for a job and have been trying to dodge my "friends" in social situations that usually mean drinking. I know I need to stop drinking because I have severe chest pain a lot of times...I am a very active person and exercise regularly so I know the pain has to be contributed to many years of binge drinking....I am getting pretty depressed though because I am not going out much anymore and having a hard time meeting people or getting my friends to do things other than hitting the bars. I see my brother being really social and it gets me even more depressed because I feel trapped in my own self-inflicted problem. Can anyone relate or have any advice? I am starting to feel like an anti-social person with no friends and it's not helping my confidence level in trying to start my career. I really wish I didn't have to completely avoid bars and restaurants but I just can't trust myself until I get a hold of things again...hopefully

Answer 1

there is more to life then drinking

Answer 2

it's fun to drink.

Answer 3

If your drinking problem is as severe as you are saying then go to your dr. There is a drug called antibuse you take it everyday and if you have a drink it make you sick im not saying this to wish the worst on you but it helps my fiance has to take it he also has a ba drinking problem and needs it to control himself from drinking just google it to find out more about it if you want read up on it and its up to you from there. Hope you well!!

Answer 4

check out aa, seriously!  you can always meet sober people there that do sober stuff! and there are a lot of young people there, its not all old folks, I'm 24 and have attended a few. a little weird but they make you feel welcome. good luck!

Answer 5

It seems your are not an alcoholic in need of AA. You are simply stating that you are not in any way able to control your alcohol consumption when you are in a place you are supposed to drink. I was the same way. Actually I still am, somewhat. I lived like an alcoholic for a couple of years, and had somewhat depressions when I hit the water wagon and stopped going out. Well, what can I tell you? If your friends only meet at bars, try to get some new friends. I know that drinking club sodas at a bar is not in any way good. Not only are you missing out on your buzz, you are also suddenly surrounded by drunk idiots. Lets face it, going to a bar when you are sober sucks. I hate drunk people when I am sober. When you are drunk you don't notice them.

You need to find people who enjoy going to the cinema and doing other non alcohol related activities. Where do you find them? Church is a good way to find them. I know christians usually suck, but sometimes they can be OK people. Some lutheran churches have people who are not hardcore, but still like to watch their drinking.

Answer 6

Good for you! It's awesome that you recognize that you need to cut it out and that you acknowledge that you can't trust yourself. I go through periods where I cannot trust myself - I always talk to my boyfriend about it and to help the situation we would stay in - and sometimes end up drinking at home. We try to come up with "healthy" things to do - like hiking or batting cages - and that helps. Another thing I would do when i had to be alone is come up with a project for myself to focus on - clean out the basement or my closet, work on a painting, work on the yard, build a pond, read those books that are sitting on my shelf...pick things that you enjoy and can be proud of when you are done. I also would encourage you to be vocal about the not drinking - if you feel more comfortable, say it has to do with a healthy diet kick you're on...but I do think it helps by telling one or two friends, and real friends will be supportive and try to find enjoyable non-alcoholic activities with you. Good luck!

Answer 7

Meet new people. You can do this by joining local singles activities clubs in your community. Many are religious based whether your Jewish, Christian, Muslim ETC. These groups may include event were drinking is involved, but you can opt out of the option and drinking in always a complement to  the evening it is never the whole evening. Also consider attending AA meetings in your community. If you feel to young to be in        AA consider other groups that cater to younger groups. Even if they are not for alcohol the steps are still the same.

Answer 8

I think you are on the right track. Avoiding situations that are potentially bad for you is very important right now.

I know it stinks to be without your friends.

If they don't know what's going on with you - you need to let them know what you are going through. If they judge you then they are not true friends. If you don't feel like you can tell them all, tell the one friend that is closest to you. They will understand and hopefully instead of putting you in a difficult situation they will choose to help with your ordeal. Instead of a night of bar hopping, perhaps this friend will go to the movies with you or out for a night of bowling or a ball game. You have nothing to be ashamed of - be true to yourself.

If you find yourself in a bar with your friends, order a club soda with lime. That way you will always have a glass in your hand.

Answer 9

Immediately go to AA meeting in your area.  It will help you to not drink and help with the missing goingout/social scene.

Answer 10

This may sound crazy at first, but bear (bare?) with me...

A lot of times, the only way to attack and confront something is to face it.  Maybe that goes for all of the time. Go out with your friends and force yourself to drink something non alcoholic. You already know you can't moderate your drinking, so instead just don't do it.

When I started college, I drank a lot and after a while it was like the same terrible nightmare replayed. I took myself away from friends and stopped drinking and was miserable. I learned to just go out, have fun and stay sober. I find I have a lot more fun when I'm 100% in control over myself anyways.

It'll suck at first. Oh my god, you will want to drink soooooo badly! You'll end up cutting a few nights short because you need to leave, and that's OK. Gradually you'll get to the point where you'll be able to stand being out longer and longer and I'm sure after a while your friends will stop pressuring you to drink. They may pick on you, which is OK! Friends will always pick on you.

Have faith in yourself and you'll get through it.