Emotional Abuse v. Verbal Abuse

Question

What's the difference between verbal abuse and emotional abuse? What's an example of both? Which one is more detrimental?

Answer 1

As the names applies: verbal abuse is when you speak of wicked things to someone; emotional abuse, on the other hand, is when your feelings has been severly hampered. Although both are very detrimental, emotional abuse is more detrimental because of the feelings that are being abuse--which could lead to depression (varying states) and possible suicidal effects (depends on how strong the individual is).

Answer 2

umm these are just opinions..want facts? google it.  

Answer 3

So many have it wrong...

Sandra J... how strong of you to be able to explain all that in such detail. Did that just ruin your day?

So far, Sandra is the only I've seen that got it right, and so many after her have still said they are the same. They ARE NOT. Verbal abuse, like she said, is obvious.

He said: You are a worthless piece of c**p, and a waste of air. <<< This is obvious verbal abuse.

However, there are people who can have a conversation with you and never say anything that at a glance seems too awfully hurtful. Sometimes that is the hardest part. You start a discussion feeling angry and hurt because of what someone did or said. You end the conversation feeling guilty for how you felt to start. You FEEL worthless, and terrible for the way you felt. The strangest thing is, however, that the abuser never actually said that. They simply manipulate what you say to mean something else, and they actually control the way your mind thinks.

That's what makes it so difficult to identify and fight against. It's not until much later when you look back and realize that you have allowed yourself to be taken on a rollercoaster ride of your own thoughts, controlled by someone else. In addition, to admit to being emotionally abused seems that you are giving something up. It feels like you are telling the world that you are weak enough to allow someone to hurt you without ever saying or doing anything to cause direct pain. Then you feel that it's your fault.

That is their goal. To make you feel so worthless and so weak that there's nothing you can do to escape their grasp.

Answer 4

Compared to emotional abuse, verbal abuse is nothing.

Answer 5

Emotional abuse and verbal abuse go hand in hand. Think about it. If someone is calling you a fat pig, worthless, ugly good for nothing, then how would it make you feel? Like you ARE worthless, right? Verbal abuse causes emotions like fear, and low self-esteem, and anger. It's a viscious circle.

Answer 6

Verbal abuse is more obvious and out there, example "you pathetic piece of human", emotional is more subtle and sneaky, example manipulation and twisting words as to make the other person feel guilty. I think that emotional is slightly worse, just because sneaky under the table things tend to be. There's the frustration of not only the action, but of the fact that no one would be able to know it's going on except the one it's being done to. Verbal abuse other people are able to hear or over hear. Like, a husband who's always yelling at his wife, other people tend to eventually find out about or see for themselves. Husbands who emotionally abuse their wives are slick about it, no one suspects it and in severe cases, outta nowhere the wife kills the husband and everyone thinks she's the one with the problem because no one was able to tell anything had been going on.

Answer 7

emotional abuse is where they mess with your head

verbal is the shouting  emotional is worse i think although they both could mean the same

Answer 8

Well, they both pretty much go hand-in-hand.  You're not really going to have one without the other.

Verbal just means that words are said:  "You f^#*ng stupid b*#ch!"

Of course you could feel emotionally abused by that as well.

You can't really be verbally abused without being emotionally abused, but you could be emotionally abused without any verbal abuse.  What if your partner goes out and cheats on you and doesn't say a word?  He or she hasn't touched you, hasn't said anything to you, but you could easily feel emotionally abused in that situation.

Abuse is abuse.  Also, it's up to the receiver whether they're going to be victimized by it or not.

Both are detrimental.

What exactly are you looking for anyway?  Are you writing a term paper?

Answer 9

Same...

Answer 10

emotional abuse is verbally administered. they are one and the same

verbal is  vocal

emotional is a feeling

so when someone says something that hurts your feelings that is an emotional response

Answer 11

Verbal abuse includes name calling, put downs, and over-the-top teasing.

Examples: You slnt, you are so ugly, why are you so fat, if only you were hotter

Emotional abuse is purposely hurting someone by giving hints or suggesting something.

Examples: yeah I was at his house. we had lots of fun in his room.

Yeah work was good. I had fun with my co worker at lunch.

Answer 12

Verbal abuse is emotional abuse.

Answer 13

Emotional abuse only happens if you let verbal abuse get to you. I want to think of the ltteral meaning of emotional abuse it's when someone uses their emotions or your emotions to get what they want. But that only works if your unaware that their doing because if you were aware you'd see them as fake.

Answer 14

Emotional is playing and relating to your feelings. Verbal is relating to you in words. Make sense?

They are a lot alike...I don't have very good examples.  

Answer 15

You can hear someone verbally abuse another person.  When you have it done to you, then it is emotional abuse.  

Answer 16

Verbal abuse is a part of emotional abuse but emotional abuse does not need to be verbal it can be psycological abuse such as withholding s*x from a partner as a form of punishment. Emotional abuse can be shaming, placing blame, humiliating your partner and knocking them down to a lower level. Emotional abuse can also be "crazy-making" (yes that is a real term), where one partner does things and denies them or otherwise does things to make the person feel like they are irrational or going crazy. Emotional abuse can also be distancing yourself from your partner for no explicable reason, giving them the silent treatment and cold shoulder without explaination only to be loving to them the next.

Verbal abuse is yelling, threatening, swearing and calling your partner names with the intention of making them feel less of a person.

Verbal and emotional abuse while they tend to come hand in hand, they do not always. Both are both detrimental to the person being abused and the relationship.

Answer 17

>Abuse is a very, very special word. It has a lot of power and should be used sparingly. Like racist, rapist, evil, genocide, n**i or any of another hot-button words if we over-use it and pull it out everytime we encounter something or someone we don't care for we cheapen it and trivialize it for the time when the person using the word needs all its power.

The spirit in which you make this request is appreciated. But I think this may be a good time to discuss abuse, and I'm going to start by discussing the point that you are trying to make.

I believe that each and every one of us here understands what abuse is, and does not use that word lightly. Because most of us have been abused, at one time or another--sexually, emotionally, physically, or psychologically abused, or neglected. There are a whole lot more terrible stories out there than you may realize. I say this from my experience as an ex-social worker with the elderly. (It was the clients who were damaged by abuse that burnt me out and led to my resignation).

Psychological and emotional abuse are not well understood. For some reason, we look at a bruise and gasp with consternation, while the rearranging of another's mind impresses us not at all. Those who claim to have been abused in this way find it difficult to describe to anyone just what it was that was done to them. In my case, for example, I just cannot bear to pull it out again, and deliberately forget the details. This inability to describe just how pain was inflicted makes it even harder for the rest of us to credit their claim.

I was battered by my father, and also by a L*****n lover. The lover ended up by trying to break my neck or strangle me, whichever would come first when you apply a hold like that. When I made my escape, I was covered with bruises in various stages of healing.

I was also psychologically and emotionally abused by my father, in the worst sort of way. Probably the same way his mother had done to him. And I feel that had I had children, I would have done much the same--too much is learned, integrated into your being.

Now, having had these experiences, I can look back and compare the damage. The beating--well, I flinch when someone touches me. I've lost my trust in life. I startle easily, and that is nerve-wracking--and upsetting to those that love me. I can't deal with violence. When I feel threatened I go into total fight-flight mode, and behave irrationally.

The psychological abuse I perceive as being far worse, far more damaging to my person. It caused decades of pain as I tried to deal with the parts of me that were reacting to abuse that had long since stopped. This kind of abuse just goes on and on, has a life that lives long after the abuser has gone.

The dynamics of psych. abuse are fascinating--and I suppose it would be interesting to delve into them at length, and contribute something to the literature on abuse. But for now, I just cannot bear to look at it for long.

Mind you, this was abuse that no one else could see. Not only was it carried on in a sly, stealthy way, it was also incidentally hidden from public view: for some reason, abusers only let their abusive personalities come out when they are with their victims. I say incidentally, because it almost seems like it's universal--but on the other hand, I suppose their behaving differently around others would serve to hide their abuse quite well.

These abusers are most often "charmers." They can be very popular with their peers. They know how to make people like them. And only someone who is well-versed in the patterns knows what to look for.

Another reason that we usually don't get to hear the details of honest-to-goodness emotional/psych. abuse is that the victims are usually loath to describe it. To describe it to third parties necessitates laying open your pummelled psyche for the world to look in and poke around. That is terrifying.

In a nutshell, this kind of abuse has some common markers: 1) it makes the victims feel as though they're going crazy--they no longer trust either their own intellects or their own instincts, and 2) it renders them emotionally disorganized, and unable to trust their own feelings. Often they are unable to determine just how it is that they are supposed (by their abusers) to think and feel, and lose the ability to trust their own thoughts and feelings, and simply give up--they disconnect themselves.

Damage? Well, how would you get through your day with both arms tied behind your back? The environment is usually seen as very dangerous, and they remain constantly on the alert. Long-term damage can include the tendency to over-analyze every move a loved one makes, and severe depression, which will result any time you cut yourself off from your feelings. One friendship or partnership after another may fail. With no self-confidence and difficulty concentrating you are likely to fail in the workaday world. The long-term depression is a stressor that can lead to chronic illness. The fracturing of your psyche can lead to serious mental illness that needs treatment. If you go ahead and have your own family, the patterns will often repeat themselves, and you can look forward to many more years of misery as your family proceeds to implode with its own dysfunction. And then of course there are all sorts of self-destructive behaviors as the victim attempts to ensure the continuance of the abuse even after the abuser is gone. (As sick as this sounds, the environment of abuse becomes the only comfortable place for them to be--humans are just built that way). There's drinking, drugging, criminal behavior, quitting any effort that might lead to happiness, overeating or anorexia, philandering, suicide...

Jeez, I could go on all day. I think it's safe to assume no one wants me to. The point that I have been trying to make is that when someone tells us they have been/are being emotionally abused I think we have an obligation to take their statement seriously--and I think everyone here is quite capable of using the word "abuse" without "cheapening" it.

Answer 18

Emotional abuse is when someone plays head games with you making you feel like you are worthless without directly saying you are worthless.Emotional abuse would be something like you constantly doing something for someone but it is never good enough. They want more from you each time indicating what you did the last time was not good enough.

Verbal abuse i when someone is constantly putting you down with words. For example telling you that you are worthless; when you do a job like cleaning the kitchen,saying, I don't know why I didn't do it myself, you never can get anything right, what good are you? Of like a parent saying I don't know why God had to give me a child like you, but I deserved a better child than this. Of telling you that you will never grow up to be anything because you are not good at anything,

With emotional abuse they are hurting you without coming right out and saying the hurtful thing but you know they are trying to hurt you.. Verbal abuse is when they come right out and just tell you that you are no good,worthless; at times you feel worse that being hit because the words that they used to hurt you hurt more than it would have if they would have just slapped you because words play over and over again in you head and hurt jut as bad each time you think of them. The sting from a slap goes away with time but words usually just seem to go on and on in your find for a long time;

Answer 19

Both are abuse and therefore equally detrimental to ones well being, verbal abuse is just that...."verbal" or spoken, a example of verbal abuse would be someone insulting or yelling, mostly always degrading words to hurt you, Emotional abuse includes verbal abuse only under a much wider spectrum.

Answer 20

When I think of emotion , I usually think of something very deep and penetrating.

Like when a parent constantly verbally abuses a child, this can contribute to emotional abuse.

Verbal abuse can be from anyone, but it can't really run very deep.

Answer 21

verbal abuse is a type of emotional abuse so there is no difference really

Answer 22

Verbal abuse is saying things that are mean, for example, you stupid idiot!  Emotional abuse can be done in many ways, with or without words, even using language that can seem nice, for example, you could say something negative about a person in a kind way, saying at the end, "I'm only telling you this because I care",  a parent not showing up to see their child, anything that abuses your feelings.

Answer 23

i think their both the same because either way your yelling and hurting someone  

Answer 24

I agree with lots of the answers down below. But who is the idiotic clown who has been giving thumbs down to people's very upsetting and emotional accounts of their experiences with any kind of abuse or mistreatment. Shame on them.  

Answer 25

well to me

verbal abuse doesn't always effect the person because they can just blow it off

but emotional abuse is when someone does or says something that does effect or hurt the other person emotionaly

Answer 26

They can be one and the same, but emotional abuse is more detrimental and the effects are more far reaching.

Answer 27

emotional abuse is worse and will be more personal such as "you are terrible at life" "nobody loves you" "it's your fault"

verbal abuse would be less personal more observational like "you're fat/ugly"  

Answer 28

I don't know how the "experts" use the labels, but to me "verbal" abuse would include blatant insults, yelling, threatening, etc. while emotional abuse is a little more subtle.  I had a stepmother once who never yelled at me, but she would always "gently" let me know what a disappointment I was.  She seemed to have a consistent goal of making me and her children feel bad about ourselves.  (I think she was raised in a similar fashion and failed to break the cycle.)  Now THAT is emotional abuse.

Which is more detrimental?  What's worse, a punch in the face or a punch in the stomach?  It depends on how strong the punch is more than on where it hits.

Answer 29

verbal abuse is like..cursing somebody out for example. usaully this happens in a fight and dosent have a lasting affect on the person. emotional abuse is saying things to people that will scar them emotionally. for example, when i was a little kid my father would tell me he was going to kill my whole family. so yeah, you could see how thats scarring to a little child even though its just words. hope i could help.

Answer 30

verbal abuse is simply when people are a wise *** in the worst way

emotional abuse is when you mess with someones feelings in the wrong way like for example you tell someone they are going to have a g*y rape if they don't turn off the television... after long amounts of time like oh say not that long like 2 hours(which is long for both) another example is when you're a parent and tell your kids they are never going to see each other again... THIS SUCKS WORSE THAN h**l!!! SO even any given person does this to someone at some point...

Darkness surrounds the person being verbally abused

Heart attack surrounds the person being emotionally abused

Theirs a HUGE difference and how do I know because LIFE is all pain and suffering but relax its o k just ct yourself and you'll feel all better... (=

Answer 31

They both can be the same in a sense. When you verbally abuse someone, it hurts them emotionally. Emotional abuse is generally caused by saying derogatory/hurtful things, or by treatment. Saying which one is more detrimental depends on the person, some people get hurt easily by actions and words, some don't. But me, emotional abuse by treatment has been hardest for me.