Emotionally Exhausted... where do I go from here?

Question

I'm just emotionally exhausted. I took a pregnancy test this morning and it came back negative. Always negative. I really thought this month we did it. I charted ....and saw my egg white mucus ...and though the right times we had s*x every other day (sometimes every day)...and even elevated my butt! I did everything everyone has offered here other than checking my temp every morning. I thought it was too early for that. I wasnt stressed at all about it, as we are newlyweds and enjoying our first year of marriage, but this seeing that Not Pregnant this morning was heartbreaking. We've been trying for 6 months and even though everyone says it takes a year....I guess I just thought it would be easier.

Why is it so easy to feel like I've done something wrong or something is wrong with me? My mother had 6 kids!

Answer 1

You keep trying. And have fun doing it. It has been my experience (I have been pregnant 7 times! 5 losses and 1 boy, girl due in 1 month. Wow!) that pregnancy has a way of sneaking up on you. If you just relax, enjoy each other and try to just have fun and not focus on the end product, you will succeed. Trust me. With my son, we were not trying, I did not even think it was a fertile time for me, but one night out with margaritas..... and this time around all it took was a weekend away, a bottle of wine and surprise! Baby girl is on the way! If after another 6-8 months, you are still not having the results you want, go to a doctor and see what can be done. But really, relax, rejoice in each other and wait, it will happen.

Answer 2

I know it's tough, but the one thing you have to do is relax!  Try not charting for 3 months, try just going on with life and not thinking about babies, and just have s*x with your man!  It will happen.  Honestly, when I was SO focused on getting preggo, it didn't happen, but as soon as I stopped focusing on it, WHAM!  Preggo the next month!  Give it a whirl - nothing is wrong with you.  Best wishes and baby dust!!!

Answer 3

If you are stressed you definitely aren't going to get pregnant. We tried for a year and when we weren't even expecting it, I became pregnant. I was very stressed in the beginning and I think that's why it took longer. Nothing is wrong w/ you, it just takes time. Wait a year then go to your doctor. Good luck!

Answer 4

im afraid lifestyle and enviromental issues can be associated with a decline in fertility these days.pestesides on food and processed foods can play a big part.still worse is the overweight  14yr old girl down the street eating fast food junk,drinking cider and smokes like a chimney,not taking any pregnancy supplements,having s*x with one night stands and gives birth to a healthy baby of a good weight.while we do what we are told and obey the rules and get nowhere fast!! in a nutshell life sucks sometimes and just doesnt seem fair.

just keep doing what you already are and dont loose faith.research as much as poss.it seems thats all i do at the moment,but i learn something new every day.check your temps every day though .stress can cause infertility too.look at my profile for the use of herbs.me and hubby are on them at the moment.what we got to lose!!

Answer 5

As hard as it may sound you can't give up.  A lot of times when trying so hard wether realizing it or not you end up stressing yourself.  It will happen.  You just have to keep your head up.  Not that you will ever have to wait this long but my cousin and his wife tried and tried and gave up.  After 18 years they have a child.  But she had complications and would miscarry a lot.  I am sure you are healthy and it will happen for you.  My husband and I tried and ended up just giving up and when we just gave up and started having s*x just for love instead of baby we got pregnant.  6 months even though it feels like forever is really no reason to start stressing yet.  Just hang tight keep your head up and before you know your special little one will be in your arms.

Answer 6

I feel your pain sister! Don't blame yourself. You have no control over it. I too have had many rough days and shed many tears. There came a point for me where I realized I just needed to let it go. I am still trying.

Answer 7

Same situation here. My husband I I recently got married and are trying to concieve as well. The first month I took a pregnancy test and the past two months I have just been waiting to see if I got my period. Last month when my period came on I cried because I felt like we had done it. I thought it would be easier too. I come from a very large family, my mother has 14 siblings, I have 5 siblings and over 50 cousins, some with children of their own. Lots of people see us as the "fertile family" but I'm starting to believe that I'm not so lucky. I don't really have any advice for you other than to keep trying, that's what I'm going to do. Just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in feeling frustrated. It will happen soon.

Answer 8

Awe so sorry to hear you are stressed!  It will happen when it is supposed to.  Stress will not help you.  It took me 3 years to get preggo.  If you really are concerned go see a doctor.  But I'd say have patience!

Best of luck to you!!

Answer 9

see a doctor

Answer 10

No theres nothing wrong with you at al!!

6 months, although feels like a long time, isnt really. alot of couples take alot longer than that. And you dont need to see a dr, most of them wont see paitents until theyve tried for atleast 12months.

Everything sounds normal and healthy. Maybe you are just a bit too stressed at the moment. How about taking a break for a month? Might help with how you are feeling- after all things can get a bit 'mechanical' when youre TTC! Enjoy being a newlywed again and restart when you are both ready.

Good luck x

Answer 11

Most likely it is the stress of trying to get pregnant.  I would suggest, stop charting.  Follow the signs of your body for sure, but don't make it all so "scientific".  It takes the fun, romance, spontaneity out of it and puts more stress on teh whole process.

My husband and I ttc'd for 6 years.  We finally "gave up" and started focuing on other things.  I got pregnant 3 months later.  I did change my diet, start exercising more and was doing acupuncture, but I think the key was that I just stopped focusing on it. I started enjoying my life and my relationship.  I stopped living my life like "what if I get pregnant this month".

I would try to just relax, have fun and give it another 3 to 4 months without doing any charting or temping.  If you aren't pregnant by then, go get checked (BOTH of you) by a specialist.