Environment speech Jokes?

Question

I need some environmental jokes for my speech? Please?

Answer 1

Do you know how to kill a envirometalist?  You hide his food stamps under his work boots!

Answer 2

And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying "I have good news and bad news. You will go before the Pharoah and demand that he release all the Hebrew slaves. He will refuse and I will smite the Egyptians with ten plagues. Eventually, he will let your people go  but will change his mind and will go after you. I will then drown his entire army, then lead you through the desert, feeding you on manna, and bringing you to a land flowing with milk and honey."

"That's wonderful, Lord. But what is the bad news?"

"You, Moses, will have to write the Environmental Impact Statement"."