European Ettiquette?

Question

I am an american with a question about French ettiquette/customs

I was on a flight from Paris to Liverpool a couple weeks ago, and sitting next to me was a French man with his wife and kids; we started talking about travelling, and I mentioned I was thinking about going back to France, maybe next year, so he started telling me about the different areas that might be cool to visit; he then mentions that if I wanted I could stay with his family for a night or two; being an american, it seems strange to invite someone you just met on an airplane to stay with you

Was his offer genuine, and us americans are too uptight? Or was he being polite, and expecting me to decline? If he was genuine, should I keep in email contact even if I don't have any plans (it may not be for a couple years until I would be able to actually pull another trip together)?

If it makes any difference, I was with my father, uncle and aunt on the plane, with whom a bit as well

Answer 1

I 110% agree with Choco BN! I'm French and I'm not choked to read your story.

I think some French people really like meet foreign people and show them how we live!

Enjoy

Answer 2

I have received the same offer several times in France and elsewhere in Europe, so I guess it's not that unusual. One thing that I rarely read here is how helpful the French are, they truly go out of their way to help others and seize every opportunity they have to be helpful, this is considered normal there whereas it draws suspicion in the US.

The French are pretty curious about Americans and maybe he is interested in making an American friend. I don't know the guy or his motives and maybe he is hoping you will reciprocate, but he is probably genuine.

The French socialize differently from Americans and inviting people over is far more common, they are always having someone over for dinner or "apéritif" (whereas Americans tend to meet outside, at bars or restaurants). It's the same in Latin America and other European countries, it's not just France. So yes, if you enjoyed his company on the plane and thought he might be an interesting guy, why not keep in touch? Time will tell if you have anything in common or not.

Answer 3

ChocoBN say "The French socialize differently from Americans and inviting people over is far more common"

This is perhaps one of the oddest statements of cultural norms I have ever heard. Exactly the reverse is true.

Americans, who have homes that are, on average, twice the size of the French, socialize at home far more than than the French (or most other western Europeans) who simply don't have the space.

This is one reason that there is such a vibrant cafe scene in France and why there is nothing to match it in the USA.  The French treat the cafe as an extension of their personal space, to an extent, because their actual personal space is relatively small.

In the American South, the phrase "Why don't y'all come see us" is almost a standard way of saying good bye to someone.

But in any part of the USA, an invitation to dinner or a backyard cook out is one of the first ways people think of adding people to the circle of friends. Indeed, people are far more comfortable inviting someone to dine at home with them than dining at a restaurant.

That being said there is no particular reason to believe this individuals specific offer was insincere. Indeed, the offer was sufficiently outside the common cultural norm that you should take it at face value.