Question:

Everyday Pessimism ?

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Is it bad to have a natural pessimistic view about things? To always believe in the worst of people? To never fully trust someone, and always doubt anything anyone says? (guaranteed there is no psychological explanation...I just tend to view things this way?)

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  1. Maybe that's who you are. As long as it doesn't mess with your life (job, etc.) because you're thinking about it, it's ok. Just be yourself, but be careful, being yourself does not mean treating people like c**p. Keep it to yourself, that's what I do. jej


  2. I quit trusting people years ago. I know it sounds horrible, but when you are let down by people who you thought were your friends it really changes your view.I'm the same.

  3. The psychological reason for this is to protect you from being hurt again.

      Maintain a positive outlook, and be determinedly optimistic, even when the circumstances don't warrant it, for the benefits it will bring, later.  If you become aware that you have backslid into your former internal monologue, (self talk) use the technique for reprogramming negative thoughts, in section 2, and 2L, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris  To help them in this: some people carry a wide rubber band in their pocket: put it on their wrist; stretch, and release, as a means of reinforcing it, and speeding up the process, re-pocketing it afterwards, but I regard this as being purely optional. Replace the negative thoughts, or images with positive ones. If using an affirmation, such as: "I want to improve, daily." or "I'm not perfect, but right now, I'm doing the best I can." or "To thine own self be true." etc., make sure it is one you choose, which you feel comfortable with. It takes 30 - 40 repetitions, to establish a new habit, with most people, so I estimate a similar amount, here.

    "Be mindful of your thoughts; they influence your words. Be mindful of your words; they influence your acts. Be mindful of of your acts; they influence your habits. Be mindful of your habits; they influence your character. Be mindful of your character; it influences your future".  Remember what Mark Twain said;

    "only thing sadder than a young pessimist, is an old optimist."  

  4. Human beings are naturally selfish. They want to survive, they want a good mate, they prefer their children over strangers children. If anything gets in the way of that, which other people can do, it will get nasty and things may end tragically. On the other hand, human beings cannot survive as a species if they are alone. Much like our cavefolk grandparents, who had to stick together to survive (you can't hunt a large animal that will feed the tribe for the week alone), can you pay your bills without a processor, cook your food without the gas company, can the benefactors get what they want if your position was eliminated from your job? No. But humans co-operate not just because of a forced social contract, but because of a natural empathy/and or altruism. Pre-homosapians didn't have a complex language to convince others tho do things, but they got on in a similar fashion like we do. Humans are naturally divided within. Most people whom I've met who are pessimists are really just fallen optimists. They had unrealistic expectations from the start, but are now baffled by the world they see around them. Remember, everybody has a bit of a devil in them. It's those that give in that make this world worse. BTW I'm speaking metaphorically, I'm nearly an atheist.

  5. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.

    That way you really can't be disappointed...

  6. treat others you would like to be treated. I do it too but i have to really pull myself away from others sometime because i really think that 95% of the people in life are just not...people i want to be around. (that was my treat people the way i want to be treated answer)  the true me is i think that they are dumb as h**l, and selfish, mean and lazy. I too have to work on me on a daily bases. Good luck  
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