Everyone always talks about finding themselves. What do you think that means?

Question

How can you lose yourself, or not know who you are? How do you define the person you are?

Anyone have any opinions on this?

Answer 1

Sweet!  Thank you for asking this awesome question!

People very often have very little awareness of who they authentically are.  we've been brought up in environments that surpress our sense of ourselves.  We are told that our natural instincts are bad, and we grow up living by sets of rules that don't fit who we are. Sometimes they are rules we had to learn in order to cope with an abusive environment. Sometimes they are just ways we developed for living with aspects of ourselves that we have been taught to despise. We may spend twenty years being miserable working at a career that our parents insisted we pursue.

For me, finding myself is about discovering the hidden secrets behind ways I have of being in the  world that don't seem to make a lot of sense.  Why do I sabotage myself? Why do I work so hard to accomplish things that often give me no joy or reward of any kind?

If you are a religious sort, finding yourself may be a process of identifying God's plan for your life, and getting on with the work of carrying it out. Otherwise, it may just mean "finding your bliss", locating a way of living and being in the world that allows you to give and receive abundantly, to experience connection with others, to soak up life down to your toes, as Auntie Mame might have said.

Answer 2

One's perception of oneself can be correct and is usually well developed by their late teens/early adult years. However, oftentimes people grow up with a skewed view of themselves due to some unfortunate specifics of their upbringing and it may often feel as though one has lost oneself/has vary little knowledge of who they truly are. What they know about themselves doesn't match the reality. It is therefore a task to regain the correct view of ones true nature/abilities/preferences yet again and to therefore realize their potential and that's what they call "find oneself".

Answer 3

Life defines self.

From a spiritual prospective.1219 - §6 In so far as man's evolving morontia (Spirit) soul becomes permeated by truth, beauty, and goodness as the value-realization of God-consciousness, such a resultant being becomes indestructible. If there is no survival of eternal values in the evolving soul of man, then mortal existence is without meaning, and life itself is a tragic illusion. But it is forever true: What you begin in time you will assuredly finish in eternity--if it is worth finishing.

Answer 4

Finding themselves... meaning finding what makes them happy...

What is your passion? The reason you would want to get out of bed in the morning.

Answer 5

To "find yourself" is just another way of saying, " What do I want to do with the rest of my life?"  Sometimes, we need to concentrate and meditate on what we really want to do in life.  Lots of times, it starts early on.  I used to "play act" that I was an art teacher, and my little sisters were my students.  We had classes and shows, and etc.  One day, I actually became an art teacher.  Most of the time, it is not that clear to everybody, probably.  Just try to think back in your life.  What did you like to read?  What did you like to play with your friends?  Hope I helped a little.  Grams

Answer 6

Finding oneself is a vague statement that a lot of people use to avoid responsibilities. People grow into themselves by living. They actually mature and take on responsibilities that matter to others near and dear to them as well as the general social strata sphere.

In my old "hippie" days back in the late sixties and early seventies I heard that so often from the stoned and the lazy that I have come to equate it with "apathy", "sloth", and "I want a free ride" attitude.

However ...

There are some men and women who are actually good hard workers looking to find out just who they are and where they come from and where they are going in the future. They say that they are trying to find themselves. I think that's a misnomer, as I believe that they are slow starters and that's all.  

Answer 7

In my opinion, when I say that I found myself I'm referring to being a freer human being, releasing your inhibitions, understand who you really are. We're constantly defined by other since our very early years and we learn to live by other people's definitions, trying to adapt and trying to conform to what others think about you or to their definition creates stress and anxiety which unconsciously makes you act in a way that doesn't feel natural. For instance, I know girls that have been told since they were very young that they have to be pretty all the time and their mother's want them to be models so that they can live through them, so these girls sometimes end up having very low self-esteem, personality problems, and a lot of other great stuff, so they're not happy because they know they're living a life and they don't like themselves, but once you can listen to your voice, once you can be faithful to your own conscience you feel like all the stress is gone, like you don't depend on others to be happy and you start to think about the things that truly make you happy in life and you acknowledge those things you can change. That's when people usually say they have found themselves because they feel like they were lost in the fog their whole lives.

Answer 8

i'll start with my experience. i've lived 9/10 of my life according to "reality" as it was presented to me. then i took a philosophy class. most people (at least in America) spend a great part of their life making money. but why? surely that cannot be what we were put here to do. surely there must be a greater purpose. so why are we here? what should we be doing with our time?  why are you here? when you ask this question you are trying to find your purpose and trying to find your purpose is another way of saying trying to find yourself. you may want to take introduction classes in both psychology and philosophy if/when you can. they can teach you all about these sorts of things. good luck on life's journey : )