Ex boyfriend in AIT as a 68W combat medic

Question

My x broke up wit me a month before going to basic (June, went to basic n July). Since i'm in a navy scholarship, and he's in an Army Rotc scholarship, he fears our relationship isn't going to work out because of distance. He is coming back home after AIT to finish college, but he's a psych major, and i'm a nursing major, and our time will be completely separated. We still remain very good friends, he calls me and we hang out. He even called me when he arrived to Basic.

I want to know (because i've heard many things about Ft. Sam) if he may possibly find someone there...perhaps another soldier, or maybe mess around when he has weekends off? He's a shy guy, and doesn't party much...err, not at all. When he was home, he would just hang at his friends house, play video games, or drink there. Do you think, months at basic training may deprived him of some..."pleasures?"

Please, i dont need comments on "move on, you're not with him" or "get over him." I've thought about it, and i still can't. I just need answers right now. If there was a chance for "US" again when he comes back, i'd like to know what things maybe going around at AIT and possibly talk to him about it before starting over again with this relationship.

I hear AIT is just like college, minus the drills, waking up so freaking early, but it's similar nonetheless. More liberty than basic. How often to do i expect phone calls when he's at AIT? I hear that after class, the rest of the day you're off, and weekends you're off.

I'd like to be here for support as well, but if something fishy may be going on, i dont think my heart can take it. I'm a nursing student, and if he needs help, i'd like to help him.

Answer 1

I know what you want to hear..it's obvious

but

during AIT there's plenty of opportunity and if he didn't plan to make use of it, he wouldn't have opted for a break up, he would have insisted you could make it work

obviously you can choose to not ask him about it, or believe him when he tells you that he hasn't done anything, and pray that one day he'll come back for you......

But I have to be honest with you, if he opted for a break up he's going to opt to have fun while he has the chance...AIT is a LOT like college, I went out I went to parties...just like any normal young man and I'm shy too....

I know you want someone to tell you everything is going to work out, and not tell you to move on, but do you really want to hang on to something that is obviously not going to pan out?  I've been there done that, you just regret the time you wasted on hoping because they arent coming back....

Answer 2

I know at Ft. Sam, you're in class from 2pm - 9pm.

But in the morning you have PT, breakfast, clean your rooms/bed checks, & then a little free time before class.

A LOT of studying has to be done tho. 68W is no joke. I still have to study to keep up, & I have a year of college under me. On the weekends you're off too. So really, after nine, & on the weekends. The drama & girls down there are nuts, except for a few that have their heads screwed on right. Girls are rediculously jealous down there, and a lot of the guys don't want anything to do with them haha.

On a more personal note..just be there for him you know? If a relationship was meant to be, then something will come out of it in the future. Even if he was too hook up with some random girl, as a spur of the moment deal, doesn't mean he won't regret it, or that he won't want to be with you at the end of the night. It sounds like he'll really miss home, and the people in his life.

Hang in there & good luck with everything! :)

Answer 3

You really need to talk to him. When I enlisted they asked if we were married and if so was that person in a different branch of the military. If you get married then they try to station you close together. Relationships are hard to have in training, you can't really go off base till you phase up and are stuck in same s*x barracks. So I don't think you have much to worry about.