Excuse me, but does anyone know the complete rules of fisticuffs?

Question

Whenever I fight we usually state some simple rules at the beginning, but I would like to have a basic set if I'm ever challenged to fisticuffs.

Much appreciated.

R.H. Wesson

Answer 1

fisticuffs?  What, is this 1920?

Answer 2

I appreciate your use of language.  I can also see why you encounter this sort of situation.

The best way is to keep it simple, because people who start to lose get desperate, and people who get desperate cheat.

The only rules you need are ones to prevent unmanly injuries (so, "No eyes, no nuts, no knees" may be enough) and ones to prevent excessive injuries ("We'll go to first blood/till someone falls down/till someone doesn't get back up/till someone taps").  You can adopt any or all of those, and you shouldn't hear much argument.

That said, you can sometimes talk your way out of a fight by setting the rules more explicitly or more roughly than someone might want to play. ("First one to vomit, we'll call it quits!" actually got me out of a fight once.)

Anyway, be careful out there.