Expression of Odyssey - a poem in 5 parts - care to comment?

Question

Odyssey

By Jellz Fisher 080730

Eau de sea

H2O

Through and through.

Chemical.

Silt to surface.

Na filled.

Not heart healthy.

Hardly

good for us.

Oh the sea

Oceans of dreams turn

Waving madness leaves me tied

Land-bound, bed-bound, spent

Ode de sea

I have always come

at your calling

Men of ages

like me, falling

Under your spell

rolling rip

Dragging, coaxing

stumbling, trip.

Fighting, losing

succumbing to fate.

The sea and I are one

too late.

Answer 1

i thot the 3rd  4th & last 2 lines of the 5th verse were quite good  tho not sure mixing styles quite works.

Answer 2

The sea is your veins, Jellz.  The imagery of the 4th Stanza

is stunning...How do you say it? Good on ya!