FEMINISTS.....Do YOU ever find yourself looking for QUALITIES in a partner that you LACK yourself?

Question

Feminists are so against gender roles and inequality in a relationship....

They are against something called "YIN and YANG"

One complements the other. I think it only makes sense for a dominante male like me to go for a passive woman I can dominate.

So... when seeking out a parter, do you look for YOURSELF (someone exactly like you) which would basically make you g*y...or do you look for someone with qualities that you LACK?

This question explores the reason feminists are labeled as lesbians.

Answer 1

Why do you ask this of feminists only? In general people tend to look for SOME qualities similar to theirs, and also for things they lack, complementary traits.

You misunderstand feminism. Feminists are against people being FORCED into gender roles that don't fit them, and in the idea that women should be as slaves to men, rather than equals.

I'm not "against" yin and yang per se. But the idea that all women are thus and so, and all men are such and such is simply false. Pretending it's true is harmful to everyone. Preferring reality to illusion is a GOOD thing.

Someone EXACTLY like me? Of course not; hardly anyone does. I look for someone who has some important things in common with me. (No, g*y is not what that makes one; g*y is one who's attracted to members of their own s*x, not someone of the opposite s*x with similar characteristics.)

I am attracted to men who have SOME qualities I lack; but these aren't a matter of "men's qualities" or "women's qualities" but different personality traits.

The reason feminists are labeled as lesbians if because there are a lot of hate-mongering morons who can't distinguish the idea that women are human beings, not property, and lust for one's own s*x.

It's also in direct contradiction to the fact that many men are feminists. In fact, all REAL men are feminists, as real men don't feel that human rights for all humans is a threat to them.

Get your mommy to look up the word 'feminist' in the dictionary and explain its meaning to you in simple words that you're capable of understanding.

Answer 2

That sounds like codependency to me..However while I may not actively seek out a particular kind of person as it shuts me off from a significant moiety of the population, I am attracted to people ho seem to possess qualities I lack..I am a shy girl, so therefore I like bold men... I am a feminine girl so I like a masculine man, I am an introvert so I appreciate the extroverts

Answer 3

If each of us can possess all the characteristics and traits ever known in humanity, we will completely self-sufficient, and will no longer need to live in a society.  We will also be filled with internal conflicts, and live will no longer be possible.  If we were completely homogeneous, everybody would be absolutely boring, and there will be no point in realizing human potentials.  One good thing is though, we will no longer hate each other for being different:-)

I am a very aggressive and insensitive person, but, I love men who are gentle and sensitive.  I admire those qualities, and wish to learn to be more gentle and sensitive, too.  I don't see how having different roles would jeopardize my right as a human being, or the quality of a relationship.  I can always choose to break away from a relationship if I start to feel exploited.  All types of relationships are built upon mutual satisfaction, no?

after thought:

Ah!  Maybe this is why some women want to be like men!!!  Being alike will resolve all the conflicts!!!

Answer 4

Hahaha! Feminist are so going to argue over nothing now. Besides since when is a relationship equal there is always a in balance in each one.

I think only two faced people have a Yin and Yang in them. Me for example: I'm two faced and didn't know it. My friends pointed it out because apparently I was scaring them that way. They told me I was acting like one person and then a minute later I was someone else. Like I knew I was like that. Doesn't help that my sign indicates that I'm two faced. O well!

Answer 5

I look for men with good jobs and who are financially well off since no matter how many jobs I have worked I never did well.  

Answer 6

Only looking for someone your own s*x makes you g*y, let's clear that one up for a start.

Almost everyone has qualities different from their partner, opposites supposedly attract. And we are talking attraction here, not deliberate seeking. I don't make partner checklists, or measure qualities. How could you, unless you've known the person intimately.

I'm declaring this question: the work of a mind yet to fully mature.

Answer 7

I don't know if this has much to do with "feminism" which is women who ask for equal rights as men... most people in relationships look for partners who will compliment their attributes. People with high strung personalities might value someone who is more laid back. People who lack direction in life might be drawn to someone who is goal oriented and driven. It's all subjective to the relationship. A feminist might find she appreciates an educated man who piques her intellect and curiosity without an "alpha male" complex. Or she might enjoy the company of a man who doesn't take her quite as seriously as she takes herself. It depends on the individual.  

Answer 8

yes a p***s and chest hair.

In everything else we are equals, sometimes I lean on him sometimes he leans on me. and he is more then just a partner he is my husband and best friend.  

Answer 9

Looking for someone that matches you doesn't make you g*y, it makes you vain. Most people end up with people who have qualities that they lack. You shouldn't have too much in common, that makes for a boring relationship in my opinion. But some people want partners who like only the same things.

Being again inequality in a relationship does not mean the people are exactly equal. Someone will be more dominant than another, but it doesn't have to be in a S&M kind of way. It means that not all women want to walked over, or bend over backwards to keep a man happy.

My boyfriend is more dominant than I am, but somehow he's wrapped himself around my little finger. I wouldn't date a submissive man, just not my thing, but neither would I date an overly dominant man.

Answer 10

No, I do not and did not.  I have a good work ethic-  why would I choose a slacker?    I had an advanced education- why would I choose someone who could not converse on the same scale?    And choosing someone with mostly similar characteristics does not make anyone g*y- it makes them smart!    

The reason feminists are labeled as lesbians is bigotry.

Answer 11

I don't look for anything. I just ended up with someone who has some things in common with me and some things different from me.

Answer 12

I seek a partner with a p***s because I lack one, lol! But to answer your question, there are certain things I want to be similar in a partner, and other things I want to be different and complimentary. I would want similar religious and moral values, for example. On the other hand, I am kind of quiet and shy, so I would want a more outgoing partner.  

Answer 13

Well, I am not a feminist but I'll answer your question anyway.

Yes, I did look for qualities in a partner that I was lacking. My husband is very much the yin to my yang. I am quiet and conservative-he is loud and opinionated, I worry easily-he's relaxed, etc. We balance each other each.

Answer 14

My husband and I have completely different qualities. I was eighteen when I got married and have been married eighteen years. Did that help?