Fair for a parent to ask my kid for gas money?

Question

All summer, my 15 year old son's best friend (who is almost 17) has hung out at our house. He's spent countless nights, I've fed him pounds of groceries, etc. They have never had my son over for anything. And when this kid comes over, usually I have to deal with transportation - she'll drop him off on her way to work, but she won't go out of her way. She drops him off about a mile from here and make him walk.

This boy called earlier and they want to go to a football game at another area high school with some girls who attend this other school. My son had spent the day mowing lawns to make enough money to take one of these girls to homecoming. When this boy called about going, I said I could not drive - so this boys said his mom would take them. Next thing I know, he's calling back to say his mom will only take them if my son pays her $20 for gas.

I told my son he can't go - that I think it's ridiculous for a parent to ask 2 kids to pay her gas money for something included in parental responsibilities. Of course, he had a fit and said it's no big deal. If he spends his lawn mowing money on this then he wouldn't have enough for homecoming tickets. He replied he will take care of earning the money again.

Does it sound normal or reasonable for this mother to make the boys pay for gas in order for her to drive them to this football game? Have I totally lost my mind for thinking a parent should *not* ask teenagers for gas money??

Thanks in advance!

Answer 1

Start 'charging' her son, see how she likes it. Of course, don't actually take his money. Just do it to see what she says. That is ridiculous!

Answer 2

no thats really messed up

Answer 3

The only thing that I can think of is that they are really short of money.  $20 sounds like a lot just to drive two kids (him and his date), but with the price of gas, it is less than 4 gallons.  If this is the case, then just pay it.  She is spending her time to take them and pick them up again.

Answer 4

That is ridiculous...this woman sounds completely oblivious to what is going on with her kid. Where does she THINK he is all those nights he isn't at home in his bed? Who does SHE think is paying for his meals when he is not at home? I know what you mean...I have been dealing with the same thing as you are since I have 3 Teens of my own, 17, 14 and 13...There are 2 of us mothers that seem to do ALL of the Dropping off and Picking up of approximately 20 kids,sometimes it takes TWO trips to get everyone,fortunately in my situation there are at least TWO of us sharing the responsibility..but you seem to be alone in your delimma...if I were you I think I would call that mom and Pose to her the questions I just posed to you...She needs to get her head out of her rear and BE a Parent! She needs to realize TAKING TURNS being the PARENTAL TAXI is all part of the bargain or giving birth~~Aloha and Good Luck~~

Answer 5

Well, I'm 15 and I think you are right.  Because its not like she is always driving them places and it is hours away.  My parents ask me for gas money is they are desperate but the always pay me back and if it is somewhere far away, like extremely far, they asked my friends once but it was 2 dollars from each of us and they bought lunch.  20 dollars is ridiculous, next time ask him to ask his mom and when she says no say you'll bring them anyway, maybe she will realize how it feels.  Good luck.

Answer 6

NO THEY ARE KIDS.. thats wrong.

Answer 7

wow, just wow. that's really sad and they sound so lazy!

Answer 8

Maybe this parent is in a tough financial situation? But still, that's ridiculous. Don't let him go. Homecoming is much more important

Answer 9

No, you are not at all wrong. This would really mess up that woman's child and you should talk it out with your kid. And make him understand that he can find better friends. It is not at all fair to your kid to mow the lawn and earn money so his friend can have fun, if they both share on it ..that would be reasonable since they can even enjoy the work but not at all for the kid.

That woman is going nuts ..