Family problems they never end?

Question

I dont know what to do who to go to or anything. My parents are constantly fighting because my mom cheated on my dad. I have known about this since july and it happened like a year idk exactly when just i know it was last year and had gone on well till around the time i found out. I thought after the big argument she was done with it. Yea again like always i was wrong. There fighting right now i can hear them idk what the **** to do i really dont. I hate my mom soo much right now i cant stand it. I wish she wasnt even my mother thats how much i hate her. They dont realize how its affecting me. My moms a w***e thats how i feel. Im crying so bad im shaking. I have no one to go to because no one understands yes i have siblings but they dont know anything about this, they moved out of the house. i just dont know what to do. btw im 16 turning 17 in 2 days. some birthday from them huh?

Answer 1

Problems in a marriage are more common than you would think. They'll work it out.

Meanwhile you should let them know exactly how you feel! Don't shelter them from the effects of their behavior. They are doing it for you. It might actually make them wake up.

Answer 2

talk to a conselor or something

Answer 3

You know sadly enuff to say the things that happen in your family do affect everyone in the house hold but to have you call your mom such a harsh name.. How dare you, you don't know why she cheated and personally thats an adult conversation rather it affects you or not..

you've only got one mom, and trust me the things you say and feel right now more than likely come back and haunt you later.. So I'd say watch the language about ur mom.. let them do there thing, your not an adult so you don't know what really took place.. and yes I repeat your a child, and you should remember you've only got one set of a mom and a dad.. rather you like it or not....

Answer 4

Honey, I am so sorry you have to go through this. Take a deep breath.

And know, Really know. That although your mom has made a lot of bad decisions. She did not do them to hurt you or even your dad.

It's very hard to comprehend. But most importantly, you need to remember none of this is your fault. Your mom is not a w***e. She loves you. You need to talk to your parents tell them how much you are hurting. And how much this is effecting you.

They are very raw right now and wrapped up in their own emotions, they may just be overlooking the fact that you still need reassurance as well.

Tell them you are hurting, that you don't know what to make of all this.  If you can't get the support you need from them, talk to one of your older siblings. Maybe even go to them first if you trust them more right now.

Just know that your parents DO LOVE YOU and DO CARE ABOUT YOU.

It's going to be okay.   ((((HUGS)))))

Answer 5

I'm really sorry you're going through this...when a person choses to have a child they essentially decide to put their children's needs before their own until their children are able to fend for themselves.  An affair is NEVER the answer, no matter what society, the media, or Cosmopolitan says.  They don't think about how it hurts the kids.

If you need someone to talk to, feel free to IM me.  My IM tweety_21ca

Answer 6

You cannot handle this adult craziness on your own. I can understand why you feel mad at your mom.  You are feeling bad for your dad and do not understand why she did what she did.  Unfortunately, affairs hurt couples and the children...it's a terrible situation for you to have to accept. Please try to find the "right" marriage/family counselor to talk to.  The anger you feel will get buried and someday you will have to deal with it...I know.  I had to bury my anger for things that went on in my former marriage...you are shaking because you do not know how to deal with the emotions that are erupting inside of you.  I handled everything in my life...then one day...I started crying and couldn't stop.  So, please ... get help now.  Talk to your parents...try to find a way to express yourself through a healthy forum...such as therapy. It really does help.  Good luck...you might even start a chat group for "teenagers affected by divorce."  There are probably a lot of young people who could use a similar group and it could be a way for you to learn coping techniques.

Answer 7

Happy Birthday Lizzie.  You don't realize it, but you do have someone to talk to you.  School guidance counselors, friends, your older siblings.  Just because your older siblings don't live at home doesn't mean you can't talk to them about it.  It's not fair that you have to deal with this on your own.  I would want my li'l sis to come to me, that's what big sis's are for.  You may even want to consider going to stay with one of them for a while, if that's an option.

Edit:  and neonlight is a jerk.  Don't pay attention to that answer.  You have every right to feel the way you do.  It's her fault you feel this way in the first place.

Answer 8

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that c**p. It isn't fair to you at all. That being said you obviously do have to deal with it, so I would say sit your parents down and tell them bluntly how you feel. Maybe the three of you can go to counseling together. Try not to be mad at your mom. You don't know the whole situation and there is always two sides to every story. She shouldn't have cheated, but that doesn't make her a w***e. Best of luck!