Father's with son's or just Men in general, Please help..Need Advice?

Question

I'm a single mom with a 6yr old son. Basically he's a bit of a punk. He let's other kids bully him and he says it's because he doesn't want to be hurt. I try to teach him to fight and explain to him the importance of protecting himself. I tell him not to hit girls but still defend himself against anyone trying to hurt him. I'm teaching him how to fight because these little brats have no manners and parents just the same. My son is smart, mannerable, funny, caring and a real people person..so he's a nerd like his mother. How do I teach him to be a young man and protect himself? What was your 1st lesson? Who taught u to fight and did it sink in? Do you think I'm on the right track to teaching him about self respect and ppl respecting him? I don't want him to be fragile like I was as a kid. It took me a while to stand up for myself but i didn't have anyone to teach me to fight or defend myself. I js wana make sure im doin rite by him. It's hard for a hardworking single mother to raise a MAN. What's ur thoughts?

Answer 1

Teach your son to be the bigger person and walk away from silly confrontations that doesn't make him weak that makes him mature

Answer 2

At the age of six, if he is being bullied in school he really should tell the teacher.  They are adults and thats part of their job, to keep the peace.  He needs to make some friends.  Encourage him to make friends by inviting a friend or friends over to the house.

Do you have a brother, uncle , father, cousin that would be willing to spend time with him?

He doesn't have to learn how to fight at this age.  I would teach him that if someone is about to hit you, do not let him hit you.  Fight back or learn to run fast.    

Answer 3

Well, your son doesnt have to fight to be able to stand up for himself. I've been in stupid fights back in high school and even one in college, but never one since them. I tell my own son that if he gets in a fight, other than to protect his girlfriend or sisters or mother, I will kick his butt myself when he gets home.

You just need to raise your son to be a strong person. Teach him right from wrong and the teach him the right way to fix a problem. You can make him strong. If you can do this for him, he more than likely wont need to fight to be a man.

Answer 4

I think maybe introduce him into a self-defence group, such as one called "spirit-combat" this teaches, the obvious..self-defence, but also self-respect,self- discipline, also it teaches when to use self-defence and when to walk away as well as fighting without fighting...google it and see if there is a group near you.

Answer 5

teaching your son to fight isnt right either as he then may turn into the bully teach him to be strong and wise and if people are annoying or bullying him to say stop i dont like it and walk away i did this with my daughter who kept saying it (each time shed get louder and more frustrated but in the end it worked and she is learnign not to let kids pick on her and she is much stronger and has never had to fight and she is only at a small school of about 30 pple so she really couldnt avoid him seems he is in her class of 8 people

Answer 6

Well, if you keep telling him that he needs to fight back, and it's just not his nature, he will feel even worse.  Hitting and punching back is not the answer when you are being bullied.  There is a difference between fighting and having dignity.  He needs self confidence.  He needs to learn what he is good at and focus on that to give him a sense of self-worth.  I'm sure he feels bad because no one likes being bullied.  Maybe he can take karate?  That teaches that fighting is a last resort.  It also teaches respect (to adults and his peers), discipline, dignity and honor.  

Just don't tell him things like he's a nerd or a wimp because he'll believe you and it will turn him into the thing you are trying to prevent.

Goodluck, your son sounds like a great kid!

Answer 7

I don't think self respect and fighting go together. your son shouldn't be taught to fight, he's 6 years old. he needs to be taught self discipline and strength of mind. let him be a little kid, and if he needs to get kids off his back, that is when you his mother, steps in maybe with the help of his teachers. fighting will just lead to nothing but trouble, now and later in life.