Favorite chuck norris jokes?

Question

whats your best/favorite chuck norris joke?

be original :)

Answer 1

this one isn't original but....

chuck norris is helen keller's favorite color

Answer 2

you're hot!

Answer 3

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris

Answer 4

Chuck Norris ordered a whoper at Mcdonalds, and he got one.

Chuck Norris is the only one who can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris doesn't get wet, wet gets Chuck Norris.

Answer 5

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.  

Answer 6

Chuck Norris clogs the toilet when he pees.

Answer 7

None, they're so old and overused

Answer 8

When Chuck Norris jumps in the water, he doesnt get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris

Answer 9

One day, Chuck Norris found himself having s*x in a truck. He wasn't wearing protection, so when he finished up, one of his sperms accidentally escaped into the truck's engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.  

Oh and about the protection part. Chuck Norris doesn't need protection. It is the condom that needs protection from Chuck Norris.

Answer 10

Idk. Ask my friend. He has an everlasting supply of them!

Answer 11

those are some good ones!!!  good job!!!  haha!!    i know someone who lovees chuck norris so he will lovee these!!!

Answer 12

This isn't my favorite or original. Just heard this from a Chuck Norris fan.

Chuck Norris doesn't hunt. Hunt can be chance - Chuck Norris just kills.

Answer 13

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus!!!

Best on ever!!

Answer 14

There is no chin behind chuck norris's beard there is only a fist!

Answer 15

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer, Chuck Norris is always in control.

Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris can believe it's not butter.

Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

Answer 16

Chuck Norris can l**k both his elbows at the same time.

Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups, he actually pushes the Earth down.

Answer 17

Most people wear superman pajamas, superman wears chuck norris pajamas.

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Answer 18

peter phelps is the new chuck norris!

Answer 19

When God said, 'Let there be light,' Chuck Norris said, 'Say please.'

Answer 20

chuck norris can believe its not butter

Answer 21

is chuck norris and lance armstrong had a how has the most testicals competition chuck norris would win by 3! lol

Answer 22

Well I have a couple.

When Chuck Norris jumps into a lake, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win.

Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.

Chuck Norris CAN touch this.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets what he wants.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

and there you go. =)