Feedback needed ASAP??! 10pts best answer!!!?

Question

How can I improve the following sentences to make them sound less cliche, yet appeal to the reader? Examples, suggestions and ideas are greatly appreciated. Please and thankyou!

Despite her grief she managed to push away from him. What did he know; what did any of them know? She took one stumbling step before her legs gave way beneath her and her world faded to black. Darkness bled into darkness, and pain into pain.

Answer 1

make the darkness and pain separate sentences to get the tone louder.

take out the before her in the 3rd sentence and the beneath her

instead of and her world faded to black, maybe as her world faded to black

Despite her grief she managed to push away from him. What did he know; what did any of them know? She took one stumbling step, legs giving way as her world faded to black. Darkness bled into darkness. Pain into pain.

Answer 2

For the third one, As she took one stumbling step before her legs gave way beneath the body of a black world. Is that ok?

Answer 3

Regardless of her sorrow she fended him off.  What did he realize?  What did any of them realize?  She took another clumsy step, only to fall--and her world decayed to nothingness.  Darkness flowed into darkness, and pain into pain.

Hope this helps.