Question:

Feedback please(poetry).?

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This a poem I wrote for my dad.. Feedback? Thanks.

I'm thirteen, I think I'm pretty good.

My Hero.

Living with the feeling of possibly never seeing someone again.

Do you know the feeling?

I do, and I live with it everyday of my life.

It's not a good feeling.

But it's what he loves.

And I'm proud of it.

He'll risk his life to save yours.

He'll stand up for whats right, rather than whats wrong anyday.

He's a hero.

He'll put himself in danger just to see that your okay.

He'll stand by your side when no one else does.

He'll be your bestfriend, when everyone turns their back.

He's my hero.

He's taught me everything I know.

He's been there since before I can remember.

He's going to be there until forever ends.

He's always going to be here to talk to, and laugh with.

He's the one guy I know will never break my heart.

He'll break the guy who breaks my heart.

He's the best guy I know.

He's my Dad, My Hero the first guy I loved.

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5 ANSWERS


  1. I hope he has read this..It is a great poem..You did a great job writing this..i can tell its from the heart


  2. Aw, that's sweeeeeeet.

    :)

  3. really good

  4. Im 13 too. That poem Is Very Nice. It Shows That You Really Enjoy Having The Dad You Have.

  5. Besides the spelling errors I caught, it is sweet. He will love it!

    I can't find it now (b/c I won't search for it - YES, I'm EF'N lazy) but it was something like "your" should have been "you're" OR maybe it was the other way around!

    Another one that I saw was short for "what is." There was no apostrophe!! Should be "what's" instead of "whats."

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