Fellow LGBT, do you believe that you were born this way or...?

Question

The environment around you, made you who you are? Or do you not really care what happened?

I sometimes ponder this, that's why I'm asking you guys.

Answer 1

I  think g*y people are born the way they are, why would they choose to have all those headaches

Answer 2

From my very earliest memories I can remember knowing that I was g*y even before I knew what that meant, or what that involved  =)  Don't ask me why, I just knew I was different from the other boys.  So, why does someone have to have s*x to know they are g*y?  It's insulting and reduces your existence to, well, just s*x.  Being g*y is, thankfully, much deeper than that.  Lying next to your boyfriend, sharing an ice cream cone with him, having a great talk together tells you all you need to know.  When your heart is racing, and you feel on top of the world, you just know.

Anyway, it always floors me to hear about people even into adulthood being confused about their sexuality. For me, there was never that confusion, I've always known I was g*y, and long long ago, I prayed hard for it to go away!  Of course, that was then, when I did not know that you could live a rich and fulfilling life as a g*y person.  

It may be the environment that affects our sexuality, but I know my brother and I grew up fairly close, and he's as straight now as I am g*y, so for me environment was not a factor. On top of that, my parents are the paradigm of straighthood.  But, as someone else mentioned, even among g*y people there's probably a wide range of experiences so, who knows?  

Even if they never answer the g*y riddle, I think I am actually pretty OK with that.  Let it remain a mystery!  To be honest, I am more concerned that one day some brilliant scientist will discover in his lab what the cause is, be it some g*y gene or whatever, and people may try to use that information to eradicate g*y people.  Keep g*y babies from being born.  "Fix" the "problem" before it starts. "Cure" people who are g*y. Sadly, there are plenty of g*y people out there who would gladly switch. To me, that is absolutely horrifying. What would our world be today without the keen sensibilities of a Tchaikovsky, a Wilde, a Whitman, or a Proust?

In a sense, maybe it does not matter why we are g*y, or how we got to be that way.  But, you know, I've worked way too hard now to accept myself as a g*y person, and have come to realize that I've actually got a pretty good thing going here.  Also, I LIKE guys, not just sexually but also emotionally, spiritually, irrationally, and, frankly, I don't want that feeling to go away...

Answer 3

One person's answer was hidden because they said you aren't g*y until you act on it. By definition I agree with this statement. Until you have sexual contact, and commit yourself to being attracted to and pursue, you aren't g*y by definition. I have problem with people who say they were born g*y because in short it means you think you are a robot and have no choice. That's not the case. We commit ourselves to the choices we make and thinking that goes along with them. When you are young and your brain isn't completely hardwired yet (pretty much under the age of 25 which is when the brain is fully developed) you are still forming and can control what you dabble in or experiment with or commit yourself to. That includes antgung and everything not just s*x or what types of personalities you are attracted to. In the past before political correctness boys that were attracted to men the same way women are were analyzed and said to have gender identification issues due to problems with their gender role models. Meaning if you mom wore the pants and your father was a cuckold you'd identify with your mother and seek a more feminine gender role as communicated by both your parents behavior. Nowadays if fashionable or cool to stand out as being g*y and sometime people walk down and commit to a path they can't turn around from. Saying you were born that way is a cop out that takes the control out of your hands and makes it sound like you are helpless and can't make your own decisions. Human beings have free will and make choices about what behavior and desires to pursue. If you choose to walk down that path or not, understand the whys of what you do and have strength in your convictions. If you don't then maybe you need to explore your decision-making (conscious, unconscious, externally influenced or whatever) more and call yourself bi, asexual or uncommitted to a sexual orientation. If you are under 25 your brain is still not hardwired and can undergo dramatic changes before the way you think and feel is more set in stone. You decide who you are and how you fulfill that definition, you aren't a robot or a victim of biology. If that were the case we'd all act like savage animals, or worse someone will come along and come up with a cure for what science ends up defining as a biological defect.  

Answer 4

Born, I was attracted to guys my age and older men when I was just a young child

Answer 5

Def. born this way

Answer 6

I think we are born that way. one way or the other we can't help it. Its not like i woke up last summer and said "i think i'll like men now"

Answer 7

When I came out to my parents, my Mother told me something that I have no recollection of and do not remember... but I trust her words. She said that she thought I might be attracted to men because I said that I liked the male underwear models in an advertisement... when I was 3 years old.

Since my siblings who were brought up in the same environment as I was are all straight, I think that I was born g*y.

Scientific researchers have since shown what I have always known in my heart to be true... that I didn't choose to be g*y but chose to accept myself for who I am... a g*y guy.

Answer 8

I'm bi and I think I became that way as a teenager. I think it was a great choice by the way.

But I believe my g*y friends were born that way and they believe that too.

Answer 9

I don't think I was born g*y; I was born asexual. When I reached puberty, I started noticing I was attracted to guys. So even though I didn't come out of my mother's womb and wanted p***s, I didn't have a choice in my sexuality later on.

Was it genetic? It makes sense, I have a g*y uncle on my mom's side and a g*y cousin on my dad's side.

Was it environmental? My parents divorced when I was twelve, so maybe having a crappy father figure combined with a traumatic experience during the early stages of my sexual development altered the course of my sexuality? Either way, I had no power over my parent's divorce.

You can't choose your sexuality like you can't choose your level of intelligence. That's why I feel bad for fundamentaslists :).

Answer 10

I did not choose to be g*y.

We say it's one of two things, or perhaps a combination of both:

1) Genetics. Well this one's simple, nobody picks their genes.

2) Environment. I didn't choose to have the life experiences I had, I just had them.

Either way you look at it; is it a choice?

Answer 11

i agree with the third or fourth dude (cant remember:S,sorry bad short-memory)...i wasnt born like that and neither believe is possible...i born without sexual leans until i reach certain age when i noticed i also liked guys...

Answer 12

Dude, I know for a fact that I was born g*y.  

Answer 13

I think different things are true for different people.  Some may choose to be g*y, but there is no doubt in my mind others are born that way.  It should't matter.  g*y people are still just people and deserve the same respect and kindness as everyone else.

Why am I being copied by that poser below me?