Figuring out if you were molested

Question

I am 24 and for about 8 yrs now I have felt like something happend to me as a child. I"m talking before I was 5 because after that is when I started doing and feeling things. I hugged my dad one day and it just felt wrong. Ever since things from when I was younger kept coming back to me and just didn't make sense any other way. Even little things that my parents would say or how they'd react didn't make sense. Yesterday I finally got the courage for the first time to ask my brother. I've never talked to anyone about it before not even my husband because of the embarassment of some of the things I remember. He told me things that he remembers doing at the same time in our lives, when we were 5 and 6 and they were the same things that I remember. I have two children 2 and 3, and I feel like I need to know for sure if anything ever happend for their safety, but what if I'm wrong? I would have completely ruined the relationship I have with my parents and if I'm right I'm sure they would never admit to something like that. How are you supposed to go about this

Answer 1

ask them flat out if ur parents really love u they will talk to u may not like u for a week at tops but u need to talk to him about it and if he did get jesus

Answer 2

Honestly I think your best bet is to see a psychologist. Not because I think you are crazy, but because part of their job is to help you sort out your feelings, memories, emotions and actions. In the meantime, if you are very concerned it's probably not something you and your brother BOTH imagined. Keep a third eye on your kids around him.

Answer 3

You need to consult a professional counselor to help you to determine and evaluate these memories or thoughts. Some one that can be objective / on the outside and help analyze what you are perceiving / or recalling from your past. A proffessional that has experience in this area of helping people to figure it out.

Answer 4

you should see a therapeutic hypnotist. it might help uncover some of those memories, and you might discover if it happened or not.  you should always talk to your children about inappropriate behaviour from others to protect them and always encourage them to come to you with any questions so that they wont have to live with the uncertain feelings or questions that you are now going through.

Answer 5

If you and your brother are remembering the same things it is likely that you were, but you might want to go to a professional therapist. They probably can help you to remember more clearly. If this did happen then you need to find out simply because you don't want to leave your children in a place where they might have this happen to them. It is time to think about your children and not worry about anybody else. They are small and trust your parents so they probably wouldn't tell you if something did happen. They would probably hold it in and it would eat them up inside until they blamed themselves and their self-esteem will suffer for the rest of their lives.  Do what you have to do to find out for sure and protect your kids. Good luck with this and God Bless You.

Answer 6

there are therapists who specialize in this sort of thing. Id highly recommend looking into it because its very hard to understand things like that without help.

Answer 7

maybe it time to explore more with professional counseling

Answer 8

Maybe you could see a psychologist or try Hypno therapy where they try to take you back to when you were younger and see what you say..

Answer 9

Tricky situation to be in but I would look at the relationship between your parents and yourself now. If it is a close relationship It might be safe to bring it up as a dream. Tell your parents you keep having the same nightmare and it's repeatedly about you being molested. If your relationship with them is not so close I would just move away from your parents with your kids and boyfriend. Tell your parents you found a job somewhere else.

Answer 10

Try hypnosis it can recover repressed memories but remember that's not always the best thing.

Answer 11

I know what you mean, sometimes you cant tell if its just hazy memories from dreams and stuff like that which can be very frustrating. If your brother remembers similar things to you then its likely that something happened right? But i would say that if you dont have any particular reason other than those memories and you have a good relationship with your dad then maybe it would be best to let it stay in the past. If I were you I wouldnt leave your kids alone with him, just incase, but as long as you can be there then it should be ok? Hmm I dunno sorry lol after saying all that.. i totally understand what you mean though, its really tough  =\  maybe you could like take him aside or something and talk about it..make sure he knows that its serious and everything but you dont want to spoil what you have if youre wrong..

EDIT: ive read the rest of your Q, and its a bit confusing heh, if you cant actually remember being molested or anything im not really sure what i would suggest. i do agree that your children are the most important in this situation, they are young and they need you. talk to them and make sure they know they can tell you ANYTHING .. look out for any changes in the way they act or whatever.. hmm sorry i cant help more  =S