First time to post a poem here, any thoughts or suggestions?

Question

I call it ..Buk. Walking alone down a dusty road that moonless night, hopelessness and despair to my left and mt right. No one to love me and no one to care, then a man out of nowhere said, "sit down, take my chair". A stranger sight I had never seen, that old man sitting on a hay bale with a quart of Jim Beam. With nothing to lose, I walked over and sat, he said "if you're cold I can loan you my hat". Some hours later after much laughter and charm, he said "follow me to that Big Old Red Barn, peace you will find there, good friends, and much love, and I've never looked back, and...I thank God above.

Answer 1

Very nicely done girl. Buk would be proud. LOL

Answer 2

Nice poem, I must say. But I have the strange feeling that I have read something similar before. But mine are worse: I destroyed them as useless. Wish I could write like that.

Answer 3

:O)

Answer 4

You are on the right track.  Here are a few examples of poetry format (forms) ♦

http://www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wi...

Answer 5

I remember this from previous post,

and smiled as I felt that's just how it would be!

I agree with the suggestion of line breaks

but you elicted the reactions beautifully.

ma

Answer 6

You have excellent writing talent.

This is a poem in prose format.  Can you also post a poem in poetic form? I would be happy to see more of your work and I am sure the poets on this site would also like to see more.

Answer 7

buc will be proud. i like that  

Answer 8

that's very good.

Answer 9

Buk will like it, nice poem.

Answer 10

AMAZING!!!

YOU HAVE TALENT!!!

Answer 11

The poem is really good and I like it a lot.  My only suggestion would be to break it up a little instead of just writing it as one paragraph, this will help the reader, e.g.

"Walking alone down a dusty road that moonless night,

Hopelessness and despair to my left and mt right.

No one to love me and no one to care,

Then a man out of nowhere said, "sit down, take my chair". "

I hope that helps, but please don't stop writing because you have talent.

Best Wishes