Flower girls versus jr. bridesmaids

Question

I am getting married next august and have girls that are 11 years old and 12 years old that are going to be in the wedding. I do not have any other little girls on either side of the family to be flower girls in the wedding. I know that that i could have them both as jr. bridesmaids but what should i do about the flower girl?

Answer 1

Hmmm..well, technically neither of them HAVE to be a flower girl. They can both be junior bridesmaids and you can have someone in the higher reaches of the chapel(like the balcony or vicars quarters) drifting flower petals down on top of everyone. And since they're not technically part of the processional, this person can be of any age.

Answer 2

My dear Christina.  You really don't need flower girls at the wedding.  You can get married without a flower girl, and the wedding will still be legal.  Don't worry about that.  Now, I would ask the two little girls if either of them would like the honor of being a flower girl.  But, you know, if I were an 11 year old girl, participating in my big cousins wedding, I would want to be a junior bridesmaid.  I would think I was too old for a flower girl.  So, leave it to them, but don't worry.  If both choose to be junior bridesmaids, and you don't have a flower girl, you will still be Mrs. Bob Smith.  I have seen it before, and it still is legal.

Answer 3

you think of like toddlers when u think of flower girls.. and jr bridesmaids as preteens....

Answer 4

You don't always need a flower girl.    The 12 and 11 year old are junior bridesmaids , they are too old to be flower girls.  Jr. Bridesmaids can still sprinkle petals , or cary pomanders , and still look cute.

http://weddings.theknot.com/ODB/themes/r...   Most often they carry smaller bouquets than the bridesmaids and the bouquet consist only of one flower.  Brides tend to stay away from junior bridesmaids sprinkling petals because it might make the girls feel  baby-ish.    But , it is your wedding , and you ultimatley decide

Answer 5

If your friend have any kids and they have a little girl maybe she could be the flowergir or just not have one.

my sisters wedding was last august and she didnt have a flower girl.

Answer 6

draw names from a hat to see which is which. that's what I'd do, because its the fairest way.

Answer 7

Ask them what they would like - flower girls, junior bridesmaids, or junior bridesmaids that throw flower petals? There's nothing saying you have to have one or the other in the wedding, and nothing saying that they have to wear flower girl dresses to throw the flower petals, and so on. It's your wedding, if you want those two girls to be in it and flower petals to be thrown then I'm sure you'll find a way to make it work.  

Answer 8

There isn't a rule that says you must have a flower girl.  Having the 2 Jr.'s will be fine.

Congrats and Good Luck!

Answer 9

ok, nobody said you HAVE to have one, lol. so its its not fitting for you, then don't have one. i think a wedding should be a very personal event. so i think its perfectly fine to mix it up a little bit.

but  if you don't feel comfortable with having a nontraditional one... i don't think 11 and 12 is too old to be flower girls.  

Answer 10

They are both a little too old to be flower girls. Young women that age are really touchy about being treated like little kids, and if you make one a flower girl and the other a junior bridesmaids, the "flower girl" is going to feel pretty lousy. My recommendation is to make both of them junior bridesmaids (or call them "handmaidens" if you want a sweeter name) and just don't bother with a flower girl. Many couples choose not to have a flower girl or ring bearer if they don't have any relatives the right age.

Answer 11

A "flower girl" is not necessary to a wedding.  If folks have a 2-7 year old in the family, they include her as a flower girl -- or a ring bearer, if it is a boy.  Usually, the kids act up during the ceremony!

In your situation, the 2 p*****n girls would be wonderful jr. bridesmaids.

Forget the flower girl.

Answer 12

You don't have to have flower girls!

I had a flower girl, but didn't have a ring barer! My mother recently got married and didn't have either.

If you have your heart set on having one though, Do you have any friends with young girls? It doesn't have to be a family member! OR just asked the girls what they think, maybe one really wants to be a flower girl while the others would prefer not too!!

Good Luck and congradulations!

Answer 13

I had this problem also (my step daughter was 8 when I got married to her dad).  She was (in my opnion) to old to be a flower girl,  and to young to be a bridesmaid.   I also had issue with the frilly flowergirl dresses I found,  I liked the idea of something more elegant for all the girls me included.  She ended up a Jr. Bridesmaid,  she had almost the same dress as the other bridesmaids but a little less grown up  (if you catch my drift).  

Since its your day,  you get to write the script.  You can have them dress like jr. bridesmaids but throw petals like flowergirls.  You could have them walk down together or with an escort.  

You may want to check with your wedding venue first, after all planning the chapel told my husband and I we couldn't throw flowers anyway.    

Good Luck with the big day

Answer 14

hhmm do u have girl that is  between 15 and 20 if u do that can be a bridesmaid

but if u just have the 12 year old and 11 depends how tall they are and how develope if they look like bit younger they can both be a flower girl now if they are develope they should be both jr bridsmaid

if the girls no each other dont seperate then i think they should all be jr brides maid ir flower girls because if u make one of them flower girl they might think u dont like them better

so this is a bit confusing  all make it simpler

1 if they know each other and they have developed make theem jr bridesmaid

2if  they not each other but no developed make flowers girl

well ask them what they want to be

hope i helped  

Answer 15

if you don't have any family or friend's children who are young enough to be a flower girl then just skip it.  once they are over about age 6 or 7, an elderly flower girl isn't cute.

when my aunt got married, she skipped having a flower girl because at the time the child she wanted as a flower girl was not Catholic (this was early 70s) and the priest would not let the child participate in the service and the child who was Catholic and who the priest would allow to participate was much too old to be a flower girl.

Answer 16

I liked Ricardo's answer. He is right about the girls thinking they are older than they actually are, and Jr Bridesmaids is more prestigious to the girls. You can also have them both as Jr. Flower Girls. Do you have a Ring Bearer picked out as yet? You could ask the younger one to be a Ring Bearer, the older one to be the Flower Girl and they can go down the aisle together or separately.

I had 2 Jr Bridesmaids. One was my Step Daughter to be, as well as her bestest friend in the whole world who could not miss the event. (I was begged and had no problem giving in.) I also, had her bestest friend be the "sign the Book important person" (for the lack of the actual name) She was so thrilled and honored and I certainly made points with my new Stepdaughter. (I gained 2 girls plus a Stepson He refused to come to the Wedding. His choice or his Momma's either way he didn't want to be a part of it) The younger Step Daughter was my Flower Girl. And the only Ringbearer I could use was my soon to be Sister in Law's older son a 2 1/2 year old Toddler  with a mind of his own. That proved to be hysterical during the Wedding Ceremony (even my Reverend chuckled). With 200 plus guests in a big Church, laughing. And yes we did practice and practice. A toddler is bound to steal your show...I loved it. Getting mad or upset would have made me look like an idiot or as it is called now a Bridezilla. Roll with the changes and the punches and your wedding will be a success. Enjoy your Day.

Answer 17

i was 11 when i was in a wedding as a junior brides maid but i was kinda sad that i was never a flower girl and even though my dad was getting remarried, i didnt feel all that important to be the bridesmaid.

So i say talk to them about it. Ask who has never been a flower girl, who wants to be the flower girl and whoever doesnt, there could be just the jr. bridesmaids. Im only 18 and dont know a whole lot about weddings but i say if you dont have a flower girl, dont sweat it because weddings dont HAVE to have flower girls. but if you feel like having one anyway, try finding guest with a daughter that might like that

good luck!