For first moms of FAILED "open" adoptions....?

Question

did you go through an agency or did you do it privetly?

Answer 1

My son's adoption was done through the Alberta Government's Family and Child Welfare department.

Answer 2

I have not personally been part of a failed open adoption, but do know two people who have been.  Both were private adoptions.

The first was my daughter's best friend who had a son at 19 years-old.  She foolishly met a couple on-line and relinquished her son through their lawyer.  She was told that she would see her son once a year and get bi-yearly photos and updates.  When she contacted the lawyer to get her first letter, she was told that the couple had "disappeared".

The second was a neighbor whose 17 year-old daughter was pregnant.  The grandmother basically sold her granddaughter (as in was paid money) through a private adoption to a couple in the area who she found through friends.  The grandmother arranged for her to visit the baby in an open grandparenting agreement, but made no arrangements for her daughter to see her own baby.  The adoptive couple moved across the country when the baby was 1 year old and did not leave a forwarding address.  The grandmother tracked them down but they will not return her calls.

Neither of these families are economically stressed, both have high incomes and stable homes.  We at least they HAD stable homes.  They are a mess now.

And who said adoption is win/win/win?

Answer 3

I went through an agency in Modesto, CA. The agency was great. The adopted mother lied about it being an open adoption. I guess she got scared. But when my baby turned 18 she called and said "come get this child!" I did...and my big girl has been a part of my life since.

Answer 4

welfare deparment