For those of you that got married in the Catholic church, can you share your experience?

Question

First of all, were both of you catholic? Was it in Spanish or English? What did you have to do to be able to get married? What were the requirements? If you had to attend classes or a retreat how was that? Overall was it really nerve wrecking? Did all your relatives attend? Or just had the witnesses? How was the priest?

My hubby and I have not gotten married by the church only civil, we are both Catholic, have received all our sacraments, except for marriage. We don't want to get married by the church, and hope to some day, but the thought of it makes me soooo nervous!

Answer 1

While the church doesn't really recognise your marriage, it still considers you to be married, and so would not marry you again. If you want to get it blessed by the church they aren't likely to make you go through pre-Cana (the courses), but you'll probably have to do some sessions with the priest. It's a fairly painless process given what you've done.

Answer 2

My husband and I got married in the Catholic church three months ago.  We were both Catholic (I went through RCIA classes and converted prior to the wedding, however, that's not a necessity!).  Our mass was in English.  In order to get married in the church we attended a one day class that wasn't too bad (each diocese has its own requirements on that) and took a survey called FOCCUS.  After taking the survey we met with the priest and talked over our answers.  All my family attended (not many of my husband's did but that's because they all lived a long ways away from where we were married).  The priest was fine - ours was really laid back.

Since you are already legally married, the ceremony in the Catholic church won't be a wedding really; it'll be a blessing.  There's nothing to be nervous about.  Why didn't you just get married in the church to begin with if it's this important to you?

Answer 3

I haven't but a friend has. Both of them were Catholic but only the groom had completed all of his sacraments. They only had to meet the priest once before the wedding (just the couple) and they said he was pretty relaxed. I think it depends a lot on the individual priest.

They had a big wedding about 200 people in the church, 3 bridesmaids and 3 groomsmen. It was all conducted in English (no one in either family spoke Spanish). The only thing the bride was disappointed about was the fact that they weren't allowed to play any music with lyrics in them during the ceremony (apart from hymns). So all of their music was instrumental.

Answer 4

Married 23 years ago in the Catholic Church, an English service, with family and friends in attendance (about 250) and still with him today.

We were required to attend an engaged couples course (about $45 I think) for 8 Saturdays for about 4-5 hours. This was actually quite helpful. They brought up issues that some of the couples hadn't thought about discussing - children (if and when, and how many), the importance of faith to each of you, who works, how are chores divided, who decides where the money goes, and what's a priority - job, travel, education, savings, etc -  who handles the bills, etc.

They taught some of the different methods of communicating and problem resolution, and gave quizzes to see if you were both on the same page as to what was (and wasn't) a priority in your life, in your partner's life, and how well they jelled.

No weekend retreat though.

We also had 4 or 5 meetings with the priest that married us as well.

There were no expenses as far as the Priest or Church were concerned. The service was free, as was the Church. We would have had to pay for the organist if we wanted one, but opted for taped music.

That was a while ago, but I hope that helps.

Answer 5

I haven't done it myself, but I've talked about it with other people who have. What I know is you have to pay the church and you are required to attend marriage consoling or something of the sort. Most places like you to be apart of the church. And most of them said they were very nerves until the end of the wedding day.

Most of the people I talked to had all there family there. A few had just like a few family members, such as mom dad grandma and brother and sister or mom dad and friends. Over all I believe most of them would do a church wedding again and the rest probably not, because some said it's just to much.

Answer 6

I personally didn't get married in the Roman Catholic church  yet (I'm only 16), but, my older sister did this summer, so, I can clear up a few things for you. :)

My sister was Catholic but her groom was not.

I've never heard of it being done in Spanish (unless it was in a Spanish speaking nation). Their ceremony was in English. And I know some churches can do it in Latin if requested, but, I personally prefer English because you can understand everything.

I believe they both needed their birth certificates, baptismal certificates, and confirmation certificates. Our church also requires a small donation for the ceremony. The couple also was required to attend a marriage preparation course. The priest also took them separately into a room and questioned them about a few things (whether or not they'd welcome children into the marriage, how often they attend church, etc).

My sister just informed me that the marriage preparation course was "boring but bearable." They attended weekly classes for a few weeks.

Both the bride and groom were nervous, but, they did fine! :)

We have family members in other countries, so, not everyone was able to attend, but, there were a lot of family and friends there. :)

The priest was very friendly. He suggested that because the groom is not Catholic, that they do not have a full mass because it can seem long and confusing for people who aren't familiar with the religion (his side of the family).

Good luck! :)