Forgive and forget??????

Question

When I was in my first year of GCSE's, a new girl started at my school. It was hard for her because she started in the middle of the year, and everyone had already found their friends and "groups". I took pity on her and befriended her. What a mistake. Within a couple of months she decided that she fancied my best friend (a boy) and hated me for spending so much time with him. She began a hate campaign against me. She damaged my uniform with a marker pen, stole things from me, got other nasty people to shout abuse at me across the school yard and dirtied a pair of her knickers and hung them up on the notice board with a sticker saying they were mine. That is only a fraction of it. It went on for over a year before she went a step too far and began slating my family. Long story short, I ended up slapping her (well actually, it was more of a punch...). I know it was wrong, but I was at the end of my tether. She had a hissy fit, stamped her feet and told me she as going to get me expelled. I was terrified. In the end, the headmaster took me to one side and told me he was glad I clobbered her because he wasn't allowed to!!! She was asked to leave and I haven't seen her since. This was 14 years ago.

My question is this... she has just requested me to be her "friend" in facebook. When I saw her name, a little bit of sick came up. It was such a long time ago that I think I should accept, bury the hatchet and get to know her as an adult. My husband says I should reject the request out of hand because she was such a nasty cow.

What should I do????? Help!!

Answer 1

I agree with Marina

Answer 2

looooooooooooooooooooong question

Answer 3

i say don't accept it

Answer 4

i think that you should accept it.

people change and as an adult she may feel embarrasment and regret for what she did to you.

i think maybe you should send her a friendly message.

if she still seems cold towards you stay away, shes not worth it.

but if she seems friendly back give her a chance, she may give an apology or you could confront her and ask her why she felt she had to do that to you.

good luck

hope i have helped.

:)

Answer 5

Don't open a can of worms. lifes too short. she may have changed but is it likely?  

Answer 6

How many years had this passed? Surely if it had been awhile she can't do anything too nasty to you again. And you already have a husband. If I were you I would accept it. Just to show her that I can be big-hearted and forgive her. You're already an adult and you would be able to handle it better. Maybe she's trying to reconcile with you. No harm in trying?

Answer 7

You should forgive her n stuff, but don't get too close with her.

Just because ur both adults now don't meen she changed much, cuz wot she did b4 woz just too much.. plus u should always trust ur instincts and wen her invite came up u felt sick so i think u don't need her in ur life.

Answer 8

Ignore her request, you have absolutly nothing to lose.  

Answer 9

Take your husband's advice. There is no reason to invite this woman into your life. You don't need her. If she needs you, she should have treated you better.

Answer 10

I would just get over it! It was 14 years ago and probably its long forgotten. She probably wants to talk and say that she is sorry! I know its sounds stupid and it is well late for an apology but i think it'll be nice to get along and forget everything that happened!

Answer 11

Nope -- you gave her an 'in' once because you felt sorry for her and she was a jerk for it.  IGNORE and stay away from her.  Do not post any personal information on facebook and make sure it's on "friends view' only to see your information.

Answer 12

I know what the 'grown up' thing to do is but I would be tempted to respond saying that no, you would not like to accept her offer of friendship in some sort of 'adult' way!!! heehee!  I'd really love to reply with 'actually, i'd rather suffer cystitis for a year' or 'stick wasps up my a*se' lol!!